Crackhead Encounters

[GQNammer]

Post your crackhead encounters here!!

7-11 on 52nd across the street from Jack James High School. Lady on a bike approaches me when I'm in my car and says,

"Should I hop in?"
Me: "No!"
Lady: "You got the stuff?"
Me: "No! Get the fuck outta here"
Lady: "wrong guy?"
Me: "Obviously, get the fuck away"

She then strolls over to my friend who's parked right beside me and approaches him. Same type of scenerio occured.

You would think crackheads would know what their dealers look like.

[mac_82]

Haha I had one back in Sept behind Westhills where they put all the new traffic circles in.

:rofl:

[shawtie]

HAHAHA to funny!!

[SilverBoost]

Do squeegie punks fit into that same catagory? It's hard to tell the difference sometimes except that the squeegie guys are a little more ambitious. Fuck I hate it when they catch you off gaurd and before you can tell them to back it off the next thing you know you have a scum brush right acoss your clean windshield.

[Hakkola]

:rofl: Squeegie bastards!!!

I pulled up to a liquor store downtown last fall and it was raining heavily. This guy came up to me and started cleaning my windshield, (which had not mud on it, just rain water), then asks me for 10 bucks so he could buy some alcohol. :rofl:

He must have been drunk already.

[dub_c]

I beat the shit out of a squeegie punk once, dumb mother fucker. Considering he SEEN me leave the car wash, he deserved what came to him.

[cman]

Parking lot across from Roadhouse, 75lb soaking wet lady with "sores" all over her face and hair that looked as though it hadn't been washed in 2 years was picking up bottles and cans then came over and asked us for money, alcohol, smokes or drugs.
meh whatever, stupid low lifes.

[Supa Dexta]

I can't remember the date exactly, but the sun last week had a pic of the redmile on the cover, a large group of fans, and then in the very middle was this crazy guy towards the bottom, stand out like a sore thumb... And here's how I know him..

The day before that I was at a buddy's house, and we were walking out his walk, towards his truck to go to the liqour store.. All of a sudden we hear this loud swoosh? of gravel and a thud.. We turn around and theres this person laying in a pile at the bottom of the hill. My buddy says "hey some kid on a scooter just whiped it" cause he seen these two little wheels sticking out of the pile of clothes thats laying 40' from us... So I ran over thinking this kid came down this hill and is laying there not moving.. When I get up to it, still not moving, I see its a man and a luggage bag, thats what the wheels were on.. I'm standing over him saying "hey are you alright? he starts moving and I pull him up, his face is all smashed up on the side and he's mumbling nothing I can figure out.. I stand him up and then I turn his bag right side up, the thing was heavy maybe 60lbs or so.. I figure he started walking down the hill and he hit the gravel and washed his feet out, perhaps the bag took him out once it got rolling..either way he ate shit... Theres a mark maybe 10' long of his feet sliding, then the pile of shit he turned into laying at the bottom.. So right after I stood him up and he started making some sense the first thing out of his mouth was:

"HEY, YOU GOT A LOONIE?"

wtF!! No I don't have a loonie you crazy bastard, I'm just seeing your alright? "yeah. yeah I'm ok he says in a mumbly mess of words" so he starts walking again, this time going up the oppposite hill.. Seemed fine but wasn't walking too straight.. but he was on his way.. so we go to the liqour store, maybe gone 5-10mins.. we come back and here he is 5' from my car taking a piss on the sidewalk! dong out, no cares in the world... We're like for fuck sakes, we don't want to talk to this guy again, so we went around the block to park in the back.. Just as we come around the side of the house to go inside, we can see him out on the street SITTING ON THE HOOD OF MY CAR!

Well thats it, I said to myself.. I marched right out to the guy and said what in the hell are you doing, get the fuck off my car.. (the whole time he has these head phone on full fucking blast) But he hears me too somehow, so he says " yeah just getting myself together" as hes sitting on my hood pulling up his zipper ... get the fuck off my car and do that.. get the fuck going... so he pointed it towards macleod trail and was gone... out of that area and out of my face thank god.. My buddy calls me up the next day saying he just got the paper and that exact guy is on it, same crooked face, and little hat, headphones and everything.. quite a laugh, city of a million ppl and this guys showing up in our lives 2 days in a row... haha

And where the hell does he get batteries for those headphones full blast all day...?

:rofl:

I got tons more, but thats the most recent.. I'm in alleys parking all the time for work, down behind cowboys and the whiskey.. hell even outside the cecil.. thats good for some sketchy dudes and crazy stories.... :rofl:

[RUQUIKR]

^^^ too funny!

[dj_rice]

Originally posted by GQNammer
Post your crackhead encounters here!!

7-11 on 52nd across the street from Jack James High School. Lady on a bike approaches me when I'm in my car and says,

"Should I hop in?"
Me: "No!"
Lady: "You got the stuff?"
Me: "No! Get the fuck outta here"
Lady: "wrong guy?"
Me: "Obviously, get the fuck away"

She then strolls over to my friend who's parked right beside me and approaches him. Same type of scenerio occured.

You would think crackheads would know what their dealers look like.



First off, this is in Forest Lawn, so its a given, 2nd I'm assuming your nammer so lol thats a given also, I get that shit all the time

[CelicaST-162]

V-unit

[3G]

hahaha couple weeks we're sitting on 7th and 8th waiting for my now ex to come meet up with us, some crazy bum comes up and asks for a joint and were like "we are craving it as much as you" he then he proceeds to ask for change so we ask him what he'll do for it. he points @ another bum and is like "watch me go steal his hat" then all you see is this bum walk up to the other bum and put his hand on his head and the other guy just ran lol, i never give these guys money but this one deserved it :rofl: :rofl:

[Lo)2enz0]

at the mcdonalds off 17th i go there every once in a while to get food late at night and your always going to have an encounter there. there is this white lady with blonde hair, watch out. during the day she freaks everyone out.

[DeeK]

LOL


I was on 8ave downtown one night close to the palace (at the time). Some guy walks up to us and just starts chatting it up, on crutches. Out of nowhere he just spouts out "oh man, I wrestle with the Hart family, Brett Hart is my best friend. (this guy is like 5'2" and 55-60 years old) I even have the Hart family crest tattoo on me." *he flips up his shirt and then drops it back down so quickly you couldnt see anything if you tried*. "Pretty cool huh?"

"I didnt see anything buddy, what are you talking about?"

he replies
"Well I got one on my wrist as well. *again flicks up his sleeve and drops it back down so quick you cant see anything* Pretty cool huh?"

"buddy, I still didnt see anything"

(this had gone on for like 10 minutes now. And hes rambling while hes trying to keep up with us down the street)

he says:
"Yea unfortunately I got hurt wrestling with my brothers, so now I'm on these stupid crutches... I HATE THEM" *he starts flippin out, and throws his crutches, then realizes he cant walk without them*

So we picked him and his crutches up and sent him on his way. He continues to follow us. He starts telling us about how he was in the WWF and was making millions, but his injury ruined his life. Meanwhile hes clearly tweeked out.

Hes starts asking us for money so that he can eat and pay his medical bills and such. My buddy and I just look at each other and laugh. He says "Pretty funny joke eh? ya, I'm kidding, I just want some money so I can get high"

We ended up giving him the small change we had on us. was like 82 cents just because he entertained us for a bit.

Funny shit.

:)

[Honda_002]

hahah i had one by the covenience store near cafe med, he crept up on us and asked us if he had our wednesday night special:rofl:

[GQNammer]

Originally posted by dj_rice




First off, this is in Forest Lawn, so its a given, 2nd I'm assuming your nammer so lol thats a given also, I get that shit all the time

But here's the thing! She was there to meet up with her dealer. She didn't walk around looking for crack. When she finally found out where her dealer was, she went to him, came back near my car because she parked her bike there, and said "Sorry man, he was over there"...............................IN AN SUV!!! Like seriously, my car looked nothing like his SUV haha.

[StupidWade]

I swear to god this is true.

I was down on 17th Ave about 8 years ago. There's a 7-11 kitty corner to the Crown. I parked in front and there was a guy laying out front, kind of half propped up on the wall beside the door. He was all ratty looking and pissed drunk, so bad that he couldn't even hold his head steady. So I had to walk past him to get in the store. As I go past him I can see that he's fumbling to get a pre-wrapped sandwich open (somebody maybe felt sorry for him and bought one for him in the store.)

I go in and wait in line to buy a pack of cheap cigars. When I come out, he's holding his sandwich in one hand and his dick in the other. He's sort of leaning over while laying down and pissing on the sidewalk beside himself. Anyway, I get away from him as quick as I can just in case he loses control of the fire hose. As I get beside my car, I look back and, sure enough, his fucking dick is out of control and he pissed all over his shirt and I think his sandwich, too.

I didn't stay to see if he took a big bite of the piss-sandwich.

[SuPhistiKatEd]

You have to admit, some of those people are hilarious.

There was this one guy in the +15 Downtown that would ask: "Could you spare me some change, I'm pregnant." I look down and he's wearing high heels. Made me chuckle.

Two guys asked me one time if I could "spare some change for their marriage liscence."

There's this one guy that stands outside of the Queens Bench everyday and the only thing he says is "Spare change....spare change....spare change..."

Walk by the 8th Street Macs...never a dull moment there.

:rofl:

[Pee_Sack]

There is this guy that live across the street from me, and he lives with a cracked out native lady. She looks like she hasn't showered in 2 years, and she is drunk/high 24/7. She leaves her house and goes for random walks down the middle of the street, and it is a pretty busy street. Couple minutes later you see her walk back up. There was one time I was sitting on my balcony and she was stumbling down the street holding traffic on both sides cuz noone could go around her. She took about 5 steps along the street and fell flat on her face. I just sat there laughing at her.

If any of you guys have been to Fort McMurray you know what it is like downtown around 7-11 and the oilcan Friday nights. So many funny stories because of these people.


By far the funniest people are Mexicans, in Mexico. When I was down there I went for a walk through a couple villages one night and they would just be walking around drunk and high and tlaking to themselves. Completely harmless, wouldn't bother you, but if you talked to them, they had some good stories....and some MAD tequila.

[kaput]

.

[l8braker]

I used to work at the 4th St. Petro Canada during a summer filling gas and there would be this one women who would drive up ask for 10 bucks in gas and when I would get her change she would smoke crack out of her pipe at the pump. She would just sit there fucked up for 5 mins and I had to move her along. We called the cops and they refused to do anything...

[Hakkola]

Hahaha, ok, I think I've told this one before but I have to tell it again.

At the Mcdonalds on 17ave sw, me and a couple of buddies are eating when this drunken indian dude walks up to us. This was back in 2002, after 9/11, so this guy starts talking about the Twin Towers and Bin Laden. Then he asks us for an extra dollar or two for some food, we are in Mcdonalds so we figure no harm done and we give him some spare change.

So he comes back and starts eating this sandwhich that looks like it has extra mayo on it, I mean mayo is just dripping out of this thing from every side. He says he's going to Afghanistan to find Bin Laden, and continues eating his sandwhich.

A couple more buddies come in and the native dude is still standing there with mayo and lettuce dripping off of his hands, and the native guy thinks it would be a good idea for him to offer a hand shake to our buddy. :rofl:

Imagine that, this mayo and lettuce filled hand reaching towards you to be shaken. It was hilarious.

I've been back to that Mcdonalds and have never seen this guy again, sometimes I wonder if he ever found Bin Laden.

[shakalaka]

Originally posted by Hakkola
Hahaha, ok, I think I've told this one before but I have to tell it again.

At the Mcdonalds on 17ave sw, me and a couple of buddies are eating when this drunken indian dude walks up to us. This was back in 2002, after 9/11, so this guy starts talking about the Twin Towers and Bin Laden. Then he asks us for an extra dollar or two for some food, we are in Mcdonalds so we figure no harm done and we give him some spare change.

So he comes back and starts eating this sandwhich that looks like it has extra mayo on it, I mean mayo is just dripping out of this thing from every side. He says he's going to Afghanistan to find Bin Laden, and continues eating his sandwhich.

A couple more buddies come in and the native dude is still standing there with mayo and lettuce dripping off of his hands, and the native guy thinks it would be a good idea for him to offer a hand shake to our buddy. :rofl:

Imagine that, this mayo and lettuce filled hand reaching towards you to be shaken. It was hilarious.

I've been back to that Mcdonalds and have never seen this guy again, sometimes I wonder if he ever found Bin Laden.

Did he look quite young by any chance? I dunno I had an Indian dude in my high school, he was so freaking weird. He'd just talk to random people, ask random girls out and if they say no, he'd be like I am gonna kill myself. He was mighty smart though, had mad grades. hmm I wonder whatever happened to him.

[Hakkola]

No man, dude was at least 35.

[shakalaka]

O right, well could be his dad I guess. :D

[Supa Dexta]

I keep running into the same guy in impark lots saying he locked his keys in his car and needs change for the bus.. ha.. I called him on it too.. I offered to help get the keys out, no deal.... And I've told him he has to stop locking his keys in his car every week.. ha.. First time I seen him was center st, probably 8-10 months ago.. And he's still using that excuse on different lots around dt...

[Orbie]

Originally posted by SuPhistiKatEd

There's this one guy that stands outside of the Queens Bench everyday and the only thing he says is "Spare change....spare change....spare change..."


This guy used to make his rounds between 4th and 5th ave on 2nd street, I thought he was pretty offensive, he'd run right up to you yelling "change...change...change". For awhile he would say please but than he reverted back to "change...change...change". One time I ran into him with some chinese friends and as we walked by he got mad and started yelling "Nips, Gooks!" :rolleyes: funny part is he couldn't even get his racism right...

[asp integra]

today at work (alberta boot, 10th ave and 5th street right across from the bottle depot) i saw this crazy homeless guy walking right down the middle of the road yelling and swearing at cars and getting in their way, right as this is happeneing i hear sirens from fire trucks coming from the fire station a few blocks up the street, they all had to stop or slow down cause this stupid guy woulnd get out of the way, i see so much stupid shit down there

[joyridder]

worst exp I ever had was in the Vancouver Bus Terminal. I had lost my return ticket back to Calgary, so I had about a 6hr wait. I had just travelled for about 5hours from Vic to Van so I was pretty tired. I was alone, female inside a crack infested cesspool of weirdo's, I could not even venture outside to have a smoke! This guy kept asking me for change, waking me up, making up a diff story every time. After the like the 6th story my patience had worn thin so I told the to fuck off!!

[eur0]

I was sleeping on the C-Train on my way to school and I could tell there was this cracked out girl sitting next to me talking away to herself. I just closed my eyes and tried to "pretend sleep", the only problem was, was that she started talking to me...for the whole fucking way to school.

I pretty much kept my eyes closed the entire time and when I was about to wake up just before SAIT, she grabs my arm and starts to twist it. Not just like a tug but wrenching on it, im like "what the fuck are you doing?" she replies "oh sorry I was just trying to tell what the time was by your watch". Note to self, hide your watches on the train, crazy bitch.

[evo916]

ive got a good one, pretty gross though, around 2 yrs ago i was drivingdown near 4st and 8th ave (st louis hotel) on the way to bartending school and a cracked out prostitute was staggering down the middle of the street i honked my horn a couple times as she was in my way but of course she doesnt move she just keeps on goin. i was just about to turn around and she lifted up her skirt and took a dump in the middle of the road i had a few other wierd encounters down there no matter what time of day this just topped the wierd stuff off :barf:

[Graham_A_M]

^ wow, thats nuts. I'm a limo driver, so I deal with crazy shit ALL the time, a whiles back I was waiting outside the corner of center street and 4th ave downtown during the afternoon. I was waiting for my guests to come out of this building right there at that intersection (they were at a business meeting). I was driving this '07 Benz 550, for that particular trip, standing right beside the rear passenger door. Then this homeless guy: (or at least I thought he was.. he looked awful), walked up to me in this incredibly boisterous and rude tone, and says "IS THAT YOUR CAR?"
ME: Yes it is can I help you? (obviously I have to be polite to people when I'm in uniform)
GUY: WELL GET IN
ME: I can't, I'm waiting for my guests in that building
GUY: I DONT CARE GET IN! (still almost yelling, being very rowdy... now drawing a crowd of spectators)
ME: I can't I'm waiting for my guests, I'm not a Taxi, if you want a taxi, I can call one for you.
GUY: I'll give you $1000 if you can give me a ride to XXXXX place
ME: Honestly I can't, and I really doubt you have $1000 on you to give to me for a 10 minute ride.


[Now, keep in mind this is the kind of guy you'd expect to see pushing a shopping cart full of bottles.]
Then he pulls out his wallet, CHOCK full (almost bursting) with $50, $100 and $1000 bills... Then he digs in a pulls out a normal looking $1000 bill, holds it in his hand and says "NOW GET IN!!"

:eek:


I was beyond shocked, like: WTF is this?
I can't just..... leave my guests and do this, I'd be fired for sure. Especially considering that my guests should have been out 10 minutes before this whole fiasco happened.. and they'd be out any minute. :banghead:
I told him that, even though every fiber in my body wanted to pull that door open and say "hop in" :bigpimp:
So he threw his hands up, $1000 bill still in hand, cursed and walked away... I he caught a cab (the ONE that stopped for him)... hoped in, and watched him drive off. :nut:

Thats not the MOST NUTTY CRACKHEAD experience that happened, but still really odd, I'll never know what could have happened.

I wont get into the "cross-dressing knifing" incident or the "porn movie" incident, since I'm DEAD tired.. maybe more later.
The life of a limo driver... after a while you deal with a bit of everything.

[Supa Dexta]

I passed by a guy once, who was just going off, as if he were on the phone about how he has this meeting and that appointment.. He's got to catch a flight here and there, he needs this on his desk...etc.. Made me wonder if at one point he actually had that stuff going on and lost it all...

[h_s]

I LOVE CRACKHEADS, i swear their awesome, i bought a pioneer in dash dvd player off a crackhead for $150, and a sony dvd camcorder for $50, and a compaq laptop computer for $200, a sony deck for $20, a carton of smokes for $10, a flames jersey for $30, (all brand new)

man it must be some good shit if your willing to go that far for a few hits, i wonder how smoking crack feels like, hmmm :dunno:

[Hakkola]

Originally posted by h_s
I LOVE CRACKHEADS, i swear their awesome, i bought a pioneer in dash dvd player off a crackhead for $150, and a sony dvd camcorder for $50, and a compaq laptop computer for $200, a sony deck for $20, a carton of smokes for $10, a flames jersey for $30, (all brand new)

man it must be some good shit if your willing to go that far for a few hits, i wonder how smoking crack feels like, hmmm :dunno:

You realize all that stuff was probably stolen, right?

[bspot]

Originally posted by h_s
I LOVE CRACKHEADS, i swear their awesome, i bought a pioneer in dash dvd player off a crackhead for $150, and a sony dvd camcorder for $50, and a compaq laptop computer for $200, a sony deck for $20, a carton of smokes for $10, a flames jersey for $30, (all brand new)

man it must be some good shit if your willing to go that far for a few hits, i wonder how smoking crack feels like, hmmm :dunno:

Way to support his habit and make sure he turns around and robs someone elses store/vehicle/house to keep it going.

[Accord_tunerx]

man it must be some good shit if your willing to go that far for a few hits, i wonder how smoking crack feels like, hmmm :dunno: [/B]


you should try and tell us how it feels :rofl:

[h_s]

Originally posted by bspot


Way to support his habit and make sure he turns around and robs someone elses store/vehicle/house to keep it going.

if i dont, the business man down the street will

[snowcatxx87]

Wait untill he sells you something that went missing from your car/house/family/ etc. Then see how much you like it.

[Kennyredline]

Originally posted by h_s
I LOVE CRACKHEADS, i swear their awesome, i bought a pioneer in dash dvd player off a crackhead for $150, and a sony dvd camcorder for $50, and a compaq laptop computer for $200, a sony deck for $20, a carton of smokes for $10, a flames jersey for $30, (all brand new)

man it must be some good shit if your willing to go that far for a few hits, i wonder how smoking crack feels like, hmmm :dunno: hopefully he doesn't know where u live, he might come back to steal the stuff he sold you...

[type_one]

Originally posted by GQNammer
Post your crackhead encounters here!!

7-11 on 52nd across the street from Jack James High School. Lady on a bike approaches me when I'm in my car and says,

"Should I hop in?"
Me: "No!"
Lady: "You got the stuff?"
Me: "No! Get the fuck outta here"
Lady: "wrong guy?"
Me: "Obviously, get the fuck away"

She then strolls over to my friend who's parked right beside me and approaches him. Same type of scenerio occured.

You would think crackheads would know what their dealers look like.


I KNOW THAT LADY!!!! i live right by that 711 and she always comes up to me no matter how many times i tell here shes got the wrong dude btw her name is wanda and if u see her again tell her that her baby is black and watch her freak

btw i sugest u roll up the window first

[adam c]

my story is in vancouver...
went there in april for the long weekend, anyways driving down East Hastings and just watching all the bums walking down the street, I know it's mean but damn I couldn't stop laughing and watching their little bum-supermarket thing where they would park their shopping carts in front of buildings and have other bums come over to theirs and start trading.

anyways the actual story, me and a bunch of buddies drove to van for the long weekend, drove all night and got there about 8 in the morning. Looked around for the hotel and finally found it. We parked across the street and this guy comes walking up, seemed a little tweaked but from his appearance I wouldn't have been surprised. He gives me this story about how he just lost his job and got kicked out of his apartment. I was just like ok... He's like I have this 1/4 bag of weed I'll sell you for cheap, i said no and continued to unpack my car, then he asked me if my friends smoked, i again said no.

He looks down at my lisence plate and goes "Hey you're from alberta, i'm from camrose", again, ok.. and whats ur point? then he asked me for change, i didn't have any and told him to ask one of my friends, he leaves but after walking half way down the block turns around and starts threatening to kill us...

---

another time in calgary, i got off the train to goto work downtown, a guy asked me for some money. i said no i dont have any. then he asked for change, i said no again. then hes like well u must be broke as i am. i was like no, i just dont carry money around with me. hes like well i take debit and credit cards lets go... i just put my headphones back in and walked away..

[brettg]

i was in the parking lot on ninth right buy td center there, oe of the many pay lots, and as my bro ad i walk through the lot near the back there are probably like 6 crack heads leaning against the fence who start to ask us for money for "food", as one os asking us the other guy in the back is actually lighting up his crack pipe andsmoking it right there in front of us and everyone else. i thougt it must have been something else but nope it was good old crack. couldnt believe my eyes. i mean at least hide that shit when asking for "food" money.

[Graham_A_M]

WOW, Crack and Meth must be SO incredibly addicting. I've only met one person that used to be a meth-head and quit. ONE. Everybody else is totally washed up on either crack or meth... it seems to be an in-escapable drug. Its SO tempting to try it, but like most: theres probably "no going back" if I did. I hear cocaine isn't nearly as addictive... oh well, I never know for sure. :dunno:

[64-impala-ss]

My favorite was the inovative crakers i seen in forestlawn sitting at a table on the side walk selling some old ass apple computers

[nich148_9]

Originally posted by 64-impala-ss
My favorite was the inovative crakers i seen in forestlawn sitting at a table on the side walk selling some old ass apple computers

I can just imagine their sales pitch:

"State of the *hic* art, loaded with *pass out*"

[j_gor78]

I worked downtown at Td Square for 3 years....finally I couldn't take it anymore getting asked for change everywhere I went. So I finally cracked and one day a homeless person asked me for change at the c-train station and so I stuck out my hand and I said, "Yeah do you have any I could really use some change" it was funny he said he said he didn't have any.

after that I just got worse and did it all the time...I just can't figure out why they never have any change and wouldn't give me any....well I no longer work downtown so I guess I can feel bad about it now:dunno:

I am a fairly big guy I don't recommend this to everyone but I got a kick out of it.

[h_s]

Originally posted by Graham_A_M
I hear cocaine isn't nearly as addictive... oh well

its actually quite addicting, i havent smoked crack or meth yet so i dont have much to compare to

[GorG]

Last summer after the stampede my buddy and I were trying to find a pizza place that wasn't packed after leaving tequila. we ended up going down to 7th St. or something and then decided to forget about it and go home, we slowly stumbled our way to train station, and we start walking past the park on 12ave. for some unknown reason (most likely because we were quite drunk and looking for an adventure) we walk through the park 5 steps in we here this lady in day in the bushes " peek a boo i see you" and then she runs away giggling. She couldn't have been more then 20 years old looked like shit though. So what ever we started walking and then we see this bum on bench.

"Why not wake him up and talk to him" my friend suggests, he was mainly curious on how 3 sheets of newspaper can actually keep someone warm. He shakes the bum until he's awake. I swear I have never seen someone freak this bad in my life “MY TOOLS, MY PRECIOUS TOOLS. WERE ARE THEY? Are you guys going to give them back so I can work? YOU'RE ALL A BUNCH OF ASSHOLES who take tools." My buddy and I are just like what the fuck is going on. Still we're laughing at the situation. He gets up and does this fucked up shake with his head, and he’s all wobbly, pretty funny and then he starts explaining to us the situation with his tools and how he's lost them. The story he told us was something about him being this amazing contractor that had these magical tools that made ever job a work of art. Then these 3 brothers came and jacked his tools one by one. Every other line was like you guys should buy me beer or give me money for this information. I'm like information? What the fuck are you on buddy? "A lot of stuff but we don't need to get into that." Both my buddy and I are just like what the fuck, ahhahahhahaha.

Next this native comes up out of the blue, the original bum is like "This Erin he can get you what you need, when you need it? So what are you guys into?" At this point my buddy and I have had enough as we turn around that same chick from the beginning is right behind us and screams "BOO" and starts rolling on the ground and laughing. Bitch probably wanted to snatch our wallets. Erin or whatever stops me before we leave and is like hey you want this mp3 player I’m like sure, he's like 2 bucks. I laugh and I’m just like deal. We go home and that’s the end of the night pretty interesting adventure to say the least.

I ended up putting in batteries in to the mp3 player and there were no songs. I searched the mp3 player and found 6 recordings basically what I got from them was that they were going to beat this chick up for not giving money to the crack dealer, this guy fucks a chick, and then his girlfriend finds out about it but forgives him. And the rest of them were like 3 natives trying to figure out how to use it and make it play songs. The recordings were the funniest things I’ve ever heard in my life. I still have them some where on my computer.

[MudCrawler]

I was in new york, at about 1:00am walking back to my hotel after a show when out of central park comes a black lady wearing nothing but a garbage bag, coming up to me talking in all of this gibberish in a raised and agressive tone.



It was scary. I left.

[Rockski]

Originally posted by GorG

I ended up putting in batteries in to the mp3 player and there were no songs. I searched the mp3 player and found 6 recordings basically what I got from them was that they were going to beat this chick up for not giving money to the crack dealer, this guy fucks a chick, and then his girlfriend finds out about it but forgives him. And the rest of them were like 3 natives trying to figure out how to use it and make it play songs. The recordings were the funniest things I’ve ever heard in my life. I still have them some where on my computer.

put them up... josh want to hear

[GorG]

KK i'll look for them when i get home, they are funny as hell, long i think the total time is 6 hours or so

[*prettyboy*]

Theres a taco bell on Edm Trail and theres some chick named phyliss that works there, i think shes a damn crack head thats trying to recover cuz shes pretty messed up in the damn head if funny going therestoned cuz she repeats every thing u say and takes an hour gettin ur shit , thats my crack head encounter hah pretty lame but wtf.:thumbsdow

[VetteRacin]

Originally posted by *prettyboy*
Theres a taco bell on Edm Trail and theres some chick named phyliss that works there, i think shes a damn crack head thats trying to recover cuz shes pretty messed up in the damn head if funny going therestoned cuz she repeats every thing u say and takes an hour gettin ur shit , thats my crack head encounter hah pretty lame but wtf.:thumbsdow

she has been there like that for atleast 6 months

[projekz]

I got one.
I lived in Vancouver for six years. Use to go down to Gastown to some clubs. Me and my buddy got out of the car in a "Secure parking lot" and started walking towards the exit when a weirdo popped out of nowhere with huge chains wrapped around his body with a big lock holding everything together. He started bitching how he was gonna go for a LONG SWIM. We ignored him and went on with our plans. We got out of the club around 2:30am and he was lying down in the middle of the street crying and yelling about losing the keys to the lock:rofl: :rofl:

Also had one in Cayman Islands. We went out for dinner and on the way back from the restaurant there was a drunk Mexican guy following us and talking to us in spanish. Neither me or my brother speak spanish so we ignored him and kept walking. When we got to a brighter part of the street he was still following us. We could see that he was bleeding from his forehead and was obviously really drunk. He kept yelling louder and then my bro said "si,si". The guy grabbed a good size rock and threw it at us. So we turned around to confront him. Another guy walking down the street came over when he saw my brother grabbing the guy by the throat and started to talk to the drunk guy and explained to us that the drunk guy had received a rock on the head and thought we did it. He had been asking us if we threw a rock at him all along while following us and got mad when my bro replied "si,si" The funny thing is that Cayman Island is a British Isle. We thought we didn't have to learn another language.

[BlueFrenzy]

I use to live in Toronto. During one of the midnight doughnut runs, there was this bum in the shop yelling at the poor cashier girl about how she's a whore and how he wouldn't sleep with her because she's too plain. Mind you, this dude was like 50, scraggly beard and would probably have a hard time getting a crackwhore to have sex with him. Anyways, I get my doughnuts and start to leave. I felt bad for the cashier so I decided to tell the bum to take a hike. he then follows me outside, all the while yelling about how he could bang any girl. Then he decides to call me a hooker (wtf??) and how he can tell that I want him so bad (I'm a guy). Then goes on to explain how he has banged Jenna Jameson and how he had to beat her off with a stick because she wanted it so bad from him. Kept walking and he eventually drifted into a parking lot. Was entertain for me, but I can't imagine what the cashier girl must have felt like.

[sh0ko]

shakalaka in indian do u mean brown?! cuz if so was his name sanjay?! did have have like a comb over and crap?! haha

[Mar]

I was driving home a few nights ago. First off, I'm from the east coast. We don't have homeless people, nobody's a bum, and never before have I ever seen anyone stand on the corner washing windows. So I pull up to the red light in my shiny coupe, 1 day out of the wash with windows down and music up. There's a bunch of guys on the corner and one of them says, "I got this one." I don't know what he's talking about but he walks up to my driver's side and puts his hand on my window and almost gets started but I was like, "No, man, don't." He ignores me so I grab his arm and say, "No, fuck off." So then, without looking at me, he says, "Don't worry about it, this one's free." So I tell him if he touches my car, I'm going to get out. He stops and looks at me in astonishment. After a few seconds he says he's got 4 other guys with him and I say I don't care, I'm going to get out and beat him if he touches my car. I guess his friends realized the downside of what would happen if the cops showed so his friend just kept waving me on through the intersection to stop the confrontation, telling me to have a nice day.

[Mar]

another time in calgary, i got off the train to goto work downtown, a guy asked me for some money. i said no i dont have any. then he asked for change, i said no again. then hes like well u must be broke as i am. i was like no, i just dont carry money around with me. hes like well i take debit and credit cards lets go... i just put my headphones back in and walked away..

I had a guy say that to me last week, I asked him where I swipe the card.

[abyss]

Originally posted by dj_rice


First off, this is in Forest Lawn, so its a given, 2nd I'm assuming your nammer so lol thats a given also, I get that shit all the time

You DO realize that this will only get worse when you roll around in an SUV right?

[RotaryDrifter]

Originally posted by Mar


I had a guy say that to me last week, I asked him where I swipe the card.


Between his ass.:rofl:

[FivE.SeveN]

I was at Mynt last weekend, parked in the lot right beside the bar. Theres this drunkass bum wandering around, comes up and asks for change. "No I dont have any." As in, go away, you'll use it for booze.

So we get in but I have to go back out to pay fuckin' impark. Dude is still there. He follows me from the exit, to the ticket machine, and starts explaining how it works. "You press this button, ok now swipe yer card! NOW PUT THAT ON YOUR DASH OR YOU GET A TICKET............. btw, got any CHANGE?"

"No! Fuck off!' OMG!

[l/l/rX]

Originally posted by Graham_A_M
^ wow, thats nuts. I'm a limo driver, so I deal with crazy shit ALL the time, a whiles back I was waiting outside the corner of center street and 4th ave downtown during the afternoon. I was waiting for my guests to come out of this building right there at that intersection (they were at a business meeting). I was driving this '07 Benz 550, for that particular trip, standing right beside the rear passenger door. Then this homeless guy: (or at least I thought he was.. he looked awful), walked up to me in this incredibly boisterous and rude tone, and says "IS THAT YOUR CAR?"
ME: Yes it is can I help you? (obviously I have to be polite to people when I'm in uniform)
GUY: WELL GET IN
ME: I can't, I'm waiting for my guests in that building
GUY: I DONT CARE GET IN! (still almost yelling, being very rowdy... now drawing a crowd of spectators)
ME: I can't I'm waiting for my guests, I'm not a Taxi, if you want a taxi, I can call one for you.
GUY: I'll give you $1000 if you can give me a ride to XXXXX place
ME: Honestly I can't, and I really doubt you have $1000 on you to give to me for a 10 minute ride.


[Now, keep in mind this is the kind of guy you'd expect to see pushing a shopping cart full of bottles.]
Then he pulls out his wallet, CHOCK full (almost bursting) with $50, $100 and $1000 bills... Then he digs in a pulls out a normal looking $1000 bill, holds it in his hand and says "NOW GET IN!!"

:eek:


I was beyond shocked, like: WTF is this?
I can't just..... leave my guests and do this, I'd be fired for sure. Especially considering that my guests should have been out 10 minutes before this whole fiasco happened.. and they'd be out any minute. :banghead:
I told him that, even though every fiber in my body wanted to pull that door open and say "hop in" :bigpimp:
So he threw his hands up, $1000 bill still in hand, cursed and walked away... I he caught a cab (the ONE that stopped for him)... hoped in, and watched him drive off. :nut:

Thats not the MOST NUTTY CRACKHEAD experience that happened, but still really odd, I'll never know what could have happened.

I wont get into the "cross-dressing knifing" incident or the "porn movie" incident, since I'm DEAD tired.. maybe more later.
The life of a limo driver... after a while you deal with a bit of everything.

theres such thing as "$1000" bills?

hrm did not know that.

[Rockski]

Originally posted by l/l/rX


theres such thing as "$1000" bills?

hrm did not know that.

yea man haven you ever played monopoly

[Seanith]

Of course theres $1000 bills. What do you think suitcases get filled with when making a big deal? $100s? hah

[GQBalla]

there are $1000 doller bills but i dont think they make them no more - aren't they purple?
my dad has a few of them i think

[NATE0513]

I used to live on 14th ave. a crack head would frequent the corner of 14th ave and 3rd street sw by the tennis courts. I'd walk past coming home from work and the tard would always ask me for shit. One day i'd had a bad day at work and past by again and the fucker asked me for some money. I totally blew up on her, told her that every time I pass her the answer is always no and that there will never be an exception. She got all shakey and shit, I gave her a nice rude chuckle and left. Next day I saw some little asian kids throwing tennis balls at her and tallying points for strategic hits on her head, after which I nick named her venus.


-NATE

[Supa Dexta]

that aint too cool^ about the balls..


and yeah theres 1000's

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/d/d3/CAD1000_Front.png/180px-CAD1000_Front.png

I used to get one now and then as a kid, when I sold cows.. ha.. haven't seen one in yrs though..


:(

[403Gemini]

Originally posted by l/l/rX


theres such thing as "$1000" bills?

hrm did not know that.

actually, there arent... anymore

they havent been in production for quite some time and basically if a store is to ever get one they are supposed to take it to a bank to be immediatly terminated.

99% of places wont even take a $1000 bill... even banks without crazy coutnerfit checking (i worked at a bank)

graham, all that money was probably counterfit, its best you didnt take the money ;)

[ProjectR]

:rofl: crackers!

[Stoppie]

Haha I had one back in Sept behind Westhills where they put all the new traffic circles in.

my friend lives by there... i've had soo many encounters aswell.

About squeegy guys im always scared to not pay em or something... like for all you know they could have a gun lol. Usually i just pay them in a cigarette or two.


one time i was parked on the curb waiting for my friend when some girl came up and got into my car... yes actually got into my car. Me and my friend (who was in the back at the time) was just like... um excuse me, wanna tell me what the fuck your doing. (this lady was pretty far gone... she could barely talk) and she was like "this better be some good stuff for what im paying for" and i was like "lady you have the wrong car, mind getting the fuck out... you dealer is behind me, i bought some stuff earlier from him" (obviously lieing) because the car behind me was a ghost car, and there was a cop having a coffee in there. She goes up to the window, i watch the door open and the cop gets out grabs her arm and she starts to struggle, and i mean struggle. She was throwing punchs at this cop. I see him throw her to the ground, put his knee on her back and cuff her and toss her in the car.

Funniest thing i ever saw/expierienced.

[Stoppie]

Haha I had one back in Sept behind Westhills where they put all the new traffic circles in.

my friend lives by there... i've had soo many encounters aswell.

About squeegy guys im always scared to not pay em or something... like for all you know they could have a gun lol. Usually i just pay them in a cigarette or two.


one time i was parked on the curb waiting for my friend when some girl came up and got into my car... yes actually got into my car. Me and my friend (who was in the back at the time) was just like... um excuse me, wanna tell me what the fuck your doing. (this lady was pretty far gone... she could barely talk) and she was like "this better be some good stuff for what im paying for" and i was like "lady you have the wrong car, mind getting the fuck out... you dealer is behind me, i bought some stuff earlier from him" (obviously lieing) because the car behind me was a ghost car, and there was a cop having a coffee in there. She goes up to the window, i watch the door open and the cop gets out grabs her arm and she starts to struggle, and i mean struggle. She was throwing punchs at this cop. I see him throw her to the ground, put his knee on her back and cuff her and toss her in the car.

Funniest thing i ever saw/expierienced. I talked to the cop after and had to sign that bullshit witness paper... but apparently she had a warrant out for her arrest for two cases of armed battery and Grand theft auto lol. My heart kinda missed a beat cause if that lady woulda unloaded on us... i dunno lol.

[Graham_A_M]

Originally posted by 403Gemini


actually, there arent... anymore

they havent been in production for quite some time and basically if a store is to ever get one they are supposed to take it to a bank to be immediatly terminated.

99% of places wont even take a $1000 bill... even banks without crazy coutnerfit checking (i worked at a bank)

graham, all that money was probably counterfit, its best you didnt take the money ;)

EONS ago, there was supposedly a $500 bill too, so I've heard. $1000 bills existed, I dont know the date of when they stopped their production I remember seeing a few of them around used fairly casually until about 10 years ago (or so) :dunno: I think people just had them just for the "flash" its pretty hard to break a $1000 bill at the till.

[Stoppie]

they don't make them... but u can request them. If you want one u can get one made.. but will prolly have a surcharge on it or somethin

[dub_c]

alot of farmers used 1000 dollar bills to buy horses and shit, atleast, thats the only time i've seen em.

[Pihsiak]

My ghetto story goes a little like this...

I was walking to the train station from Stephen Ave downtown by the old A&B sound. When I reached the alley behind the church. A guy with a long coat pops out and is all, "Hey dudes, you cool? wanna buy some weed?"
I'm all, "No thx buddy, I'm good" and keep on rolling
When I get to the train station in front of the Bay. These greasy looking punks, (prob from out of town), come up to me asking where they can get some weed.
I quickly point refer them to the guy in the alley.

[Celica TVS3]

I have a positive story about crackheads!

I was studing late at the unviersity a couple of years ago. I took the southbound train home at about 11:30 in the middle of the week. Obvously the train was compleatly dead except for another university student - he was the sterotypical nerd, picture a fat white Erkle.

At the first stop entering downtown about 8 cracked out 20-30 year old indians get on the train. They are twitching and figity.... One of the guy, seemingly the big pimp of the group lights up a smoke on the trian.

Sure enough, the nerd walks over to him and says "excuse me sir Calgary transit does not allow smoking on the c-train".

The guy looks up at the nerdy kid and laughs for a second.

I'm thinking holy shit this is going to get ugly looking around for that emergency button.

The crackhead says "yeah, but I do alot of things i'm not supposed to do". Then says, "I'm sorry sir if it bothers you i'll put it out". He put out his cigerette the nerd thanked him and nobody got stabbed.
:clap:

[Tik-Tok]

My wife used to work in the CHRA building on 1st street downtown, when waiting in my car for her to get off work I used to get all kinds of crazy crackheads come up to me, most of them hookers of course.

When she used to smoke, she had to do it outside the building, and one day I showed up to give her some money for lunch and this crazy crack-whore comes running up screaming "THIS IS MY CORNER YOU BITCH!" :rofl:

That made my year.

[romanianmagic10]

I work downtown 2 and i park on 10th ave and 8th. I start work at 7 am. There is a guy who get's up right before i pull in and starts working on his 40. How can you start drinking at 7 am for 5 days a week if not 7 for the past 3-4 months?

[/////AMG]

Originally posted by Tik-Tok
My wife used to work in the CHRA building on 1st street downtown, when waiting in my car for her to get off work I used to get all kinds of crazy crackheads come up to me, most of them hookers of course.

When she used to smoke, she had to do it outside the building, and one day I showed up to give her some money for lunch and this crazy crack-whore comes running up screaming "THIS IS MY CORNER YOU BITCH!" :rofl:

That made my year.

:rofl: :rofl: And that story has made my week.

[codetrap]

.

[Graham_A_M]

By the way, heres a pic of that $1000 bill, and that $500 bill too
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Withdrawn_Canadian_banknotes

[jdm_eg6]

Ive got one, in vancouver next to one of those robot impersonator guys was a woman dancing intensly to east indian music and humming and waving her hands about, but not collecting money, and then when electro man stopped his routeen. she picked up a left off. PS: she had a tape player :confused: hahah
bet you guys didnt get pictures of your crackheads?
here she is!
note her cut up sock on right foot
http://memimage.cardomain.net/member_images/11/web/2087000-2087999/2087668_66_full.jpg

PS: i have a video aswell if anyone dares to venture!

[turbotrip]

Originally posted by sh0ko
shakalaka in indian do u mean brown?! cuz if so was his name sanjay?! did have have like a comb over and crap?! haha



Sanjay is the ULTIMATE CRACK HEAD!!! lol the guy is like 25 and still in first year and is always shooting up heroin and shit and getting drunk as hell on campus and getting chased around uni by security :rofl: :rofl: The dude has threatened to kill a few kids at uni and chased a few of them around the Engineering Building.

[civic_stylez]

the best ive seen is a crack head that went into the 7-11 we were in and starts grabbing a ton of shit.. chips, after shave,coke, everything and proceeds to go to the counter and trys to pay with it in 200$ of photocopied money... straight out of that episode of beavis and butthead.. im standing behind this guy that smells like he took a fall down an outhouse shithole and he gets super pissed off when the clerk is like " get out of here".. he insists that its real and he must have been using a printer that he bought from jesus' last garage sale cus it used the paper that had the little holes on the side that you had to rip off. the clerks like this isnt real money and flips the note over to reveal the 20 year old stock market tips that had been printed on the other side 2 decades ago... it was just priceless and i had to give the stinky fucker credit for trying it anyways....:rofl: :rofl:

[GQBalla]

LOL^^^^^ pwned - the real question is where did he get the fake money ? and how did he print the money? the aliens did it for him

[Spatz]

i was downtown bike riding with my buddy and we were just about to pass the drop in center. across the street theres the c-train track and there was a bum holding up the c-train trying to fight it, it was pretty funny to watch, his friend came and got him though.
:rofl:

[LilDrunkenSmurf]

I was walking down to the rocky mountain plaza, and just at the entrance this fat white lady is waiting there. She walks up to me and asks me for change... i'm like "no... i just have my debit card" she's like "well do you have any cigarettes?" no... i dont smoke... "please? i'll do your laundry for a month!"
wait... hold on... WTF?! *walk away*

[Graham_A_M]

^ I'd say. we have a deal and see what other fucked up shit she'd say.:D

[dino_martini]

I always say to hobos when they ask "hey you have any spare change?" I always say, "I was just about to ask you the same thing" most just laugh about it. One followed me about 6 blocks but when I walked into Bankers Hall he left.

[adidas]

My best friend and I were walking to work one winter afternoon. We both lived a few blocks away from each other so walking to work was always a blast! But this one time we decided to stop at the Liqour store accross from the Bottle depot in downtown(10th ave and 4th street i believe). We both wanted to get drunk at work, since we worked at Mynt!

So as we walked out with a 2-6 of vodka we see a bum accross the street looking at us. So we just go our own way and i turn around and hes still looking at us, so i stare at him and since he was sitting/leaning on a fence he decides to get up and get 3 of his other bum friends. He tells em something and 3 of them start running after us, these guys must have been on something since they ran faster then me and my friend!

Both my friend and i had dress shoes on and we hardly had any grip in the snow, so when it came time to take a turn on 4th street to walk under the bridge we had to really slow down so we dont fall...2 bums decided to not run after us anymore but 1 still kept up and once we turned down on 4th steet he decided to stop also.

At the moment it was pretty scary cause neither of us were expecting these guys to start running after us.

[TheLegend8]

If a bum asks me for change, i reply, "Do i look like a change machine!?" they are usualy speachless.

[wildkarrde]

Haha, good times.

I do some construction/landscaping at all the Calgary Parking Authority lots around town, and I run into this shit all day long.

I've seen native women take shits while leaning up against fences, TONS of people shooting up, smoking crack, prosties jumping into my company truck (wtf) and this one fuck from that tried to explain to me why Russia iis the greatest nation in the world. He even starting spouting off about quantum physics, and chemistry.

Its all good and fun, but all day I have to watch out for these dumbfucks contaminated needles strewn all about these goddamn lots.

[Hanzo]

well my story isn't really an encounter with a junkie/drunk/bum.... To put it BLUNTLY, i almost ran over a drunk native guy on 16th ave by the North hill mall.

so basically what happend was, i see a red light ahead, i was on the right most lane, there was a huge 18 wheeler stopped at the red light to the left of my lane. So my visibility was greatly reduced can't see anyone crossing the road...

then light turns green so i accelerated to about 70 and went through the light, just as I pass through the light, i looked to my left to see the crosswalk that i couldn't see before since the truck was there. There was this drunk native dude about 1 meter away from me walking down the crosswalk still, if he was 2 seconds faster, i would have nailed him... Damn would that have been man slaughter for me??

[Black Gts]

I was working at the lougheed house downtown, and would always see the crackheads strolling through the park. These idiots would always try talking to us. So one day I decided to mess with them. When they came over I would say"can you do me a favor, when I was on break, I dropped a couple grams by that tree, if you can pick it up for me Ill smoke with you":rofl: :rofl: :rofl: every single one would go to the tree drop to there knees and start searching. It was actually kinda sad but we were laughing so hard it didnt matter.

[Graham_A_M]

http://www.mx6.com/forums/showthread.php?t=172052

^ thats an interesting story....

[PiMpIn SmUrF]

haha thats great, i got a weird story aswell.

Me and my brother(big dude) were at my dads house one night hanging out. My dad was in the living room watching tv, Then we hear the door knock and my dad opens the door and this totally cracked out guy trys to come in, my dad pushs the door in his face and the guy keeps saying *let me in my house, i want my cloths and tv and dvd player i left in there back. LIKE HE WAS SERIOUSLY MESSED UP. I dont know what kind of drugs he took.
My dad calls the cops and we hear him knock on the next door(this single mom and kid live there) she yells out *im calling the cops if you dont leave). He then starts saying *IM GOING TO LIGHT A FIRE), then he trys to light a fire and me and my bro said fuck it lets not wait for the cops and open the door and the guy is sitting beside our door trying to start a fire. So we grab the guy and just beat the shit out of him. When the cops got there he was just laying there looking confused all bloody.
Cops said *good job for taking care of your father(my dad is a older guy 62yrs old)
We didnt even get charged or anything. They gave us props.
The funny part is when they were picking the guy up he tryed to punch the cop then bam right back on the ground face down haha.

[Graham_A_M]

^ big props. If he would have forced his way in with the single mother next door... that could have really taken a turn for the worse:(

[old&slow]

Oddly I have a story as well. I recently went up to the local timmies for my morning java.There's a kinda cute girl there who looks to be latino. I didnt pay much mind til she followed me out the door.She asked for a light which was just an icebreaker. She was from forest lawn and was looking for a ride back there from Mckenzie Lake.
I'm a bit of a pussy for that kinda thing so I said sure why not.I had time.
As we were driving down the deerfoot the story unfolded.She'd been partying(hooking?) and got dumped somewhere in my hood. Anyhow out comes the crackpipe and she starts smoking the thing like it was a cigarette and I guess I wasnt supposed to mind!
We finally arrive where she wants to go and then comes the begging for money."could ya loan me some money?"
I say no. Then she tells me she dont expect something for nothing and lets me know that I can have my way with her for a price. But she insists she's not a hooker.

I gotta say tho, I was tempted. She was a real hottie.She didnt look like a crack whore by no means. I guess she just started the stuff.

Her friends must have heard us pull up and came out to inquire as to me being a cop,so she quickly ran off!

Do u think I shoulda just got some head? :)

[doublepostwhore]

Why would you let the bitch smoke crack in your car. :confused:

Did you want to get a hybrid form of aids? no? Good choice on denying head.