Top 10 douchebag cars

[DuPont]

Got a laugh out of this from the 350Z/G35 Forums, enjoy.
And don't get your panties in a bunch if you happen to drive one on the list. :rolleyes:

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Top 10 douchebag cars

..10 Maserati: This car is in the number 10 spot only because of their lack of prescence on the road. Typical of a mid-30s douchebag, these cars can be found with their either wealthy or stupidly indebted owners driving like complete morons in thick midday traffic. When they aren't trying to impress high school sophomores with their rad fake ferraris they can be found laying black marks into onramps and nearly taking out soccer moms when they fail to signal while playing NASCAR on the highway.

..9 Civic Si: While most civics are owned by sensible motorists just wanting cheap transport, a small group of teenage douchebags, empowered by the fantastic scenes of speed in The Fast and the Fictious have decided that one car stands above all else as a powerhouse road rocket. They have chosen the anemic Civic Si to show the rest of the commuting world just who's boss. With it's stunning 170 HP, these buzzfarting pests can be seen slowly bumbling through traffic, racecar style, sometimes passing on shoulders and turn lanes to prove their macho vehicles are faster than anything they happen to pass, most of the time when no "race" of any sort is taking place.

..8 BMW 3-Series: Everyone's encountered these douchebags on the road. Yuppie with a cell phone up to his ear, crappy eurotrash technomusic blaring, chinese knock-off designer sunglasses on and a pink polo shirt with the collar popped like a pro. This metro douchebag has only one thing on his mind when he's driving, and that's proving how big a douchebag he really is to any and all drivers on the road. When you are at an intersection with a lane that ends, he will try to race you to get in front of you, when you are doing 15 over on the freeway, he will pretend to be agitated and floor his mighty 220 HP mill to flyby you and show that his vehicle is meant for autobahn speeds. Apparently the warranty as a clause about a free replacement vehicle if the car is damaged while running a red light or stop sign, regardless of age or mileage, so be careful when these crowning douchebags pull their ultimate driving machine up to the line, they might just cross it!

..7 Dodge Ram: This list wouldn't be complete without the country douchebag cousin. Out of all the trucks, none has spurned a douchebag craze like the Hemi toting ram. With it's big grille, sunburnt, dirty, tattoo'd arm hanging out the window, and a confederate flag adorning the rear window, this truckload of douchebaggery will bear down on any little car that happens to be in front of them, tail gating them until they can snarl their overstressed engine to gradually pass by. Loud and awful sounding exhausts along with gun racks and cam seat covers are common place on these rural douche haulers. Just make sure you have a decent bit of distance between these tailgating SOBs if you decide to brake check these lunatics, trucks aren't known for their ability to stop.

..6 Trans-Am: A hardy choice for a midlevel douchebag, Trans-ams are notorious for their owners complete lack of self control when it comes to showing off their badass plastic muscle car. Revving their obnoxiously loud engines at anything with 4 wheels and an audible engine, these douchebags are always looking for a chance to show off their douchebaggery. More often than not, some slack-jawed yokel, upon being called such, will utter phrases like "well what do you drive" or "my shit's faster'n yours". This boondock douchebag call, while not limited to trans-am drivers, is often followed by a big burnout , no matter how thick the traffic is, and a middle finger. It should be noted, these douchebags appear to network with other douchebags to form douche convoys.

..5 Camaro SS: The companion douchebag to the trans-am, these cocky bastards have taken a notch above the trans-am because of the ego boost their SS badge gives them. SS, standing for Super Small, is a reference to their penis size. Often the SS douchebag (lol sounds like a ship full of pussies) will try to show off for his inbred girlfriend by racing vehicles that aren't acknowledging a race, or participating in the douchebaggery of trans-am owners, as stated above. On top of burnouts, donuts, and being obnoxious, they firmly believe the SS badge of their Camaro gives them super powers over other Camaros, even V8s, inspite of a weight difference not over come by the marginal power difference.

..4 Mustang Cobra: The crowning douchebag of the V8, the Mustang Cobra reigns supreme in their godlike douchebaggery. Cobra douchebags suffer from a Napoleonic complex that their cars are the greatest vehicles ever made. The fact that can be fast is the primary fuel for this ego. However, when these douchebags are bested they fall back on a douchebag cliche as old as time. People who think their car sucks are jealous of it, and wish they could afford the bourgeois pricetag of a $27000-$30000 car. They are also prone to excuse making, from the design of the car, to the fact that some of these douchebags just don't know how to drive them. These are all excuses levied to try and quell the flood of criticism of the small-dicked, arrogant douchebag when they try to show off more than they are able.

..3 Subaru STi: The douchebag mobile for the 21st century is here. Complete with a simulated penis enlarging function that gives the owners of these fugly shopping carts with engines the feeling they are more masculine than they truely are. Again spouting claims of jealous or inability to afford a cheap japanese import, the drivers of these cars are the first all-weather douchebags of the list. Because of mass advertising campaigns, the pinheaded morons driving these cars seem to think that any day, rain, snow, shine, or 3" of glaze ice is race day and will not hesitate to prove this to you, even if it means slamming into a telephone pole on a winter day. On top of that, the turbocharged engine gives these twats a sense of superiority over other vehicles that don't have turbochargers. The douchebags brag about these fascinating pieces of technology, even if they haven't a clue how they work.

..2 Mitsubishi EVO: Thanks to a mass marketed hype, Mitsubishi was able to jump into the douchebag market with the Mitsubishi EVO, an ugly piece of junk that can best be described as a turbocharged chinese takeout box. Because of the hype and aura surrounded by these douchemobiles, their owners think their cars are invincible, able to best every and any car on the road or track, inspite of reality. Again jealousy is an issue with the owners of these rolling dumpsters because we all know people just wish they owned a $30000 Lancer with a hopped up engine. Additional "technology" features (including a massive wing inversely proportional to the owners penis size) attract quasi-intelligent douchebags to these cars because they can pretend to explain how all the useless marketing features actually make their cars fast. Through extensive douchebag networking, a random douchebag always knows some other douchebag who is a friend of a douchebag with an Evo that runs single digits in the quarter mile. This information is bogus, and often imparted by a douchebag trying to impress non-douchebags about a hyped up douchemobile that he doesn't own. Races with these uber-fast EVOs never materialize either. Fortunately, the hype on these vehicles is fading away, but egos remain higher than ever as a result, with douchebags desperate to prove how badass they can be by racing anything on the road.

and now...

The Number 1 Douchebag Vehicle of All

Dodge Neon SRT4: The ultimate in douchebaggery vehicles. A worthless turd of a vehicle, slapped together by the company that brought you the Ram, comes a douchemobile of unimaginable proportions. There is not a single owner of these vehicles that isnt faithful to the douchebag way of life. Whether it's talking up their slow piece of crap and never running it, making every excuse from the douchebag rolodex of BS reasons why they won't race or lost a race, or simply doing childish douchebag things like weaving, blowing through redlights, flooring it at every opportunity, burnouts in traffic, revving at cars two lanes over and in front of them, racing in traffic, nearly rear ending cars, losing control and flying off a road while attempting to race a car that wasn't race, NASCAR impersonations, trying to show off to their ugly girlfriend how macho they are by being a complete moron, pretending parking lots are rally tracks, and thinking they have the fastest car ever built, SRT4 owners do it all. They are world class, award winning, grade A douchebags that need to be stomped, laughed at, outrun, and outdone in every car related anything they bring their pieces of crap too. Even Dodge thought they created a douchebag monster they couldn't control so they axed it. Above it all, these douchebags are in intense denial about one thing: THEY DRIVE NEONS. Neons will never be cool, respectable, awesome, attractive, or have a legacy other than being pre-form scrap metal. Douche on SRT4 owners, douche on!
__________________

[BerserkerCatSplat]

That was funny the first dozen times he said "douchebag," then it got repetitive and annoying. :dunno:

[JAYMEZ]

^^ Lol no doubt.. Gota love how the G35 /350z guys dont put themselves on this :rofl:

[glennc]

Originally posted by BerserkerCatSplat
That was funny the first dozen times he said "douchebag," then it got repetitive and annoying. :dunno:

I lost interest after my car was listed 9. Slight error, 170? Im prolly closer to 180 :rofl:

[andres_mt]

haha awesome...I'd be so dissapointed if SRT-4 wasn't number one. :rofl:

[Sprinter]

SRT-4 drivers should be knicknamed "El Douchebags"

[lexIS300]

i have no idea how a maserati got on the list. they are beautiful cars

[glennc]

Lets add a REAL number one to that list.

Nissan 350z/G35: As if number 2 the evo wasnt enough douchebaggery for you, topping the list is the 350z. Drivers of these volkswagen beetle rip-offs tend to think that ripping along in rushhour traffic to get to the front of the line is the only way to live. For these dilusional drivers saving 2 seconds on a trip to and from the dealership to get an OEM distributor cap that will make mad horses is just a part of life. Tinted front and side windows often provide that little extra security just so everyone driving past cant see how much of a douche is hidden within. With these douches youll often find they will in fact try to race you, pull ahead, realise there are a set of horrible train tracks and almost lose it before the next red light (true story). Well aware of the aero-dynamics of their aparantly sleek rides, these middleaged mcdicks managers actually beilive that having an elongated beetle makes them faster. Prone to horrible taste in 19 inch rims and lips, the breed of drivers that flock to these cars clearly top the list of .douche-bag-bagery-ish-nis

[IntegraG2]

a douchebag is a person that drives a car not the car itself....doesnt matter what car you drive a driver can be a douchebag regardless....and this douchebag word is fucking annoying.....damn douchebags.....hahaha

[403Gemini]

Originally posted by JAYMEZ_STi
^^ Lol no doubt.. Gota love how the G35 /350z guys dont put themselves on this :rofl:

actually i first saw this on the srt forums ;) its clearly a joking list lol

[footballer]

man funny stuff but why the evooooooo noooooooooo.

[That.Guy.S30]

Originally posted by DuPont


..2 Mitsubishi EVO: . Races with these uber-fast EVOs never materialize either.

[/B]

haha i find this funny b/c the EVO will wipe the floor with the g35/350z stock.

[brandon]

lol you guy's didn't read this right.

The g35 forum/350z forum did not create this! it was just hotlinked on there as is now on beyond.

[That.Guy.S30]

Originally posted by brandon
lol you guy's didn't read this right.

The g35 forum/350z forum did not create this! it was just hotlinked on there as is now on beyond.

ohhhhhhhhhh... ahahah

haterade for us all then.

[harv91]

i think that the guy who made this article up is just pissed cuz he takes the bus all day and those were the cars that laughed at him for takin the bus :guns:

[LilDrunkenSmurf]

don't take offense, its just a joke, my car was on there as well... i'm a
"teenage" civic driver, i get mocked all the time, just learn to laugh it off... doesn't matter who wrote it... it was funny for the first 10 douchebags or so

[infected]

Originally posted by DuPont


..5 Camaro SS: The companion douchebag to the trans-am, these cocky bastards have taken a notch above the trans-am because of the ego boost their SS badge gives them. SS, standing for Super Small, is a reference to their penis size. Often the SS douchebag (lol sounds like a ship full of pussies) will try to show off for his inbred girlfriend by racing vehicles that aren't acknowledging a race, or participating in the douchebaggery of trans-am owners, as stated above. On top of burnouts, donuts, and being obnoxious, they firmly believe the SS badge of their Camaro gives them super powers over other Camaros, even V8s, inspite of a weight difference not over come by the marginal power difference.



Best one ever!! :rofl:

[JAYMEZ]

lol of course its a joke , im kinda pissed the EVO beat the STi though .... Damnit , im gonna get spinners on my car.

[403Gemini]

Originally posted by JAYMEZ_STi
lol of course its a joke , im kinda pissed the EVO beat the STi though .... Damnit , im gonna get spinners on my car.

lol oh dont worry, my cars to new to be on that list otherwise im sure itd be upt here :thumbsup:

[glennc]

Of course its a joke. My joke is a post.

[Supa Dexta]

stratus/sebring convertible should have made that list.. ha

I get a kick out of most people that drive those, they are always the first ones out in the spring and the last ones to put them away in the fall, and the only ones that drive around with the top down on cold shitty days, thinking they are king shit...

:burnout:

[sh0ko]

its funny haha


attempting to race a car that wasn't race

hmm good english very

[FivE.SeveN]

Originally posted by DuPont

Dodge Neon SRT4: The ultimate in douchebaggery vehicles. A worthless turd of a vehicle, slapped together by the company that brought you the Ram, comes a douchemobile of unimaginable proportions. There is not a single owner of these vehicles that isnt faithful to the douchebag way of life. Whether it's talking up their slow piece of crap and never running it, making every excuse from the douchebag rolodex of BS reasons why they won't race or lost a race, or simply doing childish douchebag things like weaving, blowing through redlights, flooring it at every opportunity, burnouts in traffic, revving at cars two lanes over and in front of them, racing in traffic, nearly rear ending cars, losing control and flying off a road while attempting to race a car that wasn't race, NASCAR impersonations, trying to show off to their ugly girlfriend how macho they are by being a complete moron, pretending parking lots are rally tracks, and thinking they have the fastest car ever built, SRT4 owners do it all. They are world class, award winning, grade A douchebags that need to be stomped, laughed at, outrun, and outdone in every car related anything they bring their pieces of crap too. Even Dodge thought they created a douchebag monster they couldn't control so they axed it. Above it all, these douchebags are in intense denial about one thing: THEY DRIVE NEONS. Neons will never be cool, respectable, awesome, attractive, or have a legacy other than being pre-form scrap metal. Douche on SRT4 owners, douche on!
__________________ [/B]



COUNTDOWN UNTIL HEAVYD ARRIVES STARTS NOW :nut:

[shakalaka]

..8 BMW 3-Series: Everyone's encountered these douchebags on the road. Yuppie with a cell phone up to his ear, crappy eurotrash technomusic blaring, chinese knock-off designer sunglasses on and a pink polo shirt with the collar popped like a pro. This metro douchebag has only one thing on his mind when he's driving, and that's proving how big a douchebag he really is to any and all drivers on the road. When you are at an intersection with a lane that ends, he will try to race you to get in front of you, when you are doing 15 over on the freeway, he will pretend to be agitated and floor his mighty 220 HP mill to flyby you and show that his vehicle is meant for autobahn speeds. Apparently the warranty as a clause about a free replacement vehicle if the car is damaged while running a red light or stop sign, regardless of age or mileage, so be careful when these crowning douchebags pull their ultimate driving machine up to the line, they might just cross it!




Man that's freakin bullshit man! I ain't ANYTHING like that!

[bituerbo]

Crown Vic's didn't make that list?
Sheer number of wreckless taxi-cab drivers alone should be reason enough.

[QuasarCav]

..8 BMW 3-Series: Everyone's encountered these douchebags on the road. Yuppie with a cell phone up to his ear, crappy eurotrash technomusic blaring, chinese knock-off designer sunglasses on and a pink polo shirt with the collar popped like a pro. This metro douchebag has only one thing on his mind when he's driving, and that's proving how big a douchebag he really is to any and all drivers on the road. When you are at an intersection with a lane that ends, he will try to race you to get in front of you, when you are doing 15 over on the freeway, he will pretend to be agitated and floor his mighty 220 HP mill to flyby you and show that his vehicle is meant for autobahn speeds. Apparently the warranty as a clause about a free replacement vehicle if the car is damaged while running a red light or stop sign, regardless of age or mileage, so be careful when these crowning douchebags pull their ultimate driving machine up to the line, they might just cross it!





Yup, and it's only starting to get bad. Every Brian Boy around has one.

[dino_martini]

Originally posted by shakalaka





Man that's freakin bullshit man! I ain't ANYTHING like that!

You are the minority. Probably 90% of all 3 series drivers I encounter on the road fit that description to a T.

But then again, they are just mad because most of these cars can match the speed and acceleration of their cars.

They missed the Ford F350.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v212/martman104/bmw-1.gif

[l8braker]

Originally posted by dino_martini


You are the minority. Probably 90% of all 3 series drivers I encounter on the road fit that description to a T.

But then again, they are just mad because most of these cars can match the speed and acceleration of their cars.

They missed the Ford F350.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v212/martman104/bmw-1.gif

Haha, i dunno about your estimation there, but that pic is hilarious!

I agree with the Mustang ranking.

[acura_el]

hahaha that's some funny stuff...but i dont think those douchebaggers can afford the 170HP civic yet. i only see them driving the <120 HP civics

maybe in a few years...

[Unknown303]

Oh jesus i couldn't believe the number of times i had to read douchebag in that post. Now i'm going to be saying that all over the place today. Hope no girlscouts are out selling cookies. Damn douchebags.

[viffer]

I can't believe Jetta didn't make the list.

[pinoyhero]

LOL, thats a great pst, and yes I like the 350z/g35 one as well

[scat19]

Originally posted by shakalaka





Man that's freakin bullshit man! I ain't ANYTHING like that!


I know man, my polo is Blue god damn it!

[khtm]

LOL before I read this I was thinking SRT-4

[acura_el]

i've noticed a lot of ppl using the word douchebag in other threads ever since this was posted

[three.eighteen.]

as far as i'm concerned there is only one definition of douchebag...and its covered pretty good by the description of the civic driver, pink polo shirt, gay aviator sunglasses
if anyone here frequents the deerfoot inn/casino poker room, that Rick guy, is a douchebag in my books :rofl:

[shakalaka]

Originally posted by dino_martini


You are the minority. Probably 90% of all 3 series drivers I encounter on the road fit that description to a T.

But then again, they are just mad because most of these cars can match the speed and acceleration of their cars.

They missed the Ford F350.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v212/martman104/bmw-1.gif

hahahah
Those are some funny pics.
PS: I always use my signal lights.

[ianmcc]

Originally posted by IntegraG2
a douchebag is a person that drives a car not the car itself....doesnt matter what car you drive a driver can be a douchebag regardless....and this douchebag word is fucking annoying.....damn douchebags.....hahaha
In that case-how about whatever Toma is riding in? ;)

[silbergrau330]

Originally posted by dino_martini


You are the minority. Probably 90% of all 3 series drivers I encounter on the road fit that description to a T.

But then again, they are just mad because most of these cars can match the speed and acceleration of their cars.

They missed the Ford F350.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v212/martman104/bmw-1.gif


I would have to say I am an exception, I frequent the the road in my sweats, having a chew, and blaring my country music. Im more suited for a Ford-F150 I think. :rofl:

[RuthelessNazi]

Swap civic and srt-4 simply because that neon will eat a civic up regardless of how gay it is(and regardless of what civic owners think).

[iceburns288]

Originally posted by glennc
Tinted front and side windows often provide that little extra security just so everyone driving past cant see how much of a douche is hidden within.
Prone to horrible taste in 19 inch rims and lips, the breed of drivers that flock to these cars clearly top the list of .douche-bag-bagery-ish-nis
Hey, fuck you:D I sold my 19s but I did leave the tint;) .

The 3-series driver is PERFECT, I always see those guys. Ditto for the Civic Si:rofl: .

I also got 'raced' on a left-turn (dead serious) by a guy in a Civic Si... so I guess he's jacking off on the honda-tech forums about how his hp/l pwns mine and my car can't handle for shit.:)

[max_boost]

Nice. I drive a douchebag car but I'm not a douchebag. It's good to be in the minority. haha

These metrosexual Bryan boy wannabes also debdage their 320 and 323's so people mistakenly think it's a 330. :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[BoS_DC2]

Mitsubishi EVO, an ugly piece of junk that can best be described as a turbocharged chinese takeout box.

^ HAHA.

[rc2002]

Originally posted by FivE.SeveN

COUNTDOWN UNTIL HEAVYD ARRIVES STARTS NOW :nut:

Haha, countdown is still ticking.

This list sounds to me like the writings of a jealous person who got his ass handed to him buy all of the listed cars.

[robpark]

Hahahahaha #8.... I know how to use my signal lights but dead on with the technomuzak and lane ending accelo-race!

[Canmorite]

Originally posted by glennc


I lost interest after my car was listed 9. Slight error, 170? Im prolly closer to 180 :rofl:

46 times says Word:D

[heavyD]

Ha Ha. I knew before I read that the SRT-4 would be #1 because it's largely true. I don't even frequent the srtforums much anymore because I can't handle the idiots that think the car is an incredible machine & comparable to a Ferrari. I shit you not but there are threads like "My SRT-4 vs 911 Turbo. Can I take him?" and people will say with your mods you should be able to take him or a driver's race to the least, 911's are heavy & overrated. It's completely ridiculous.

I agree with the list mostly but whomever originally wrote the article seemed to have a specific hatred for the STi, EVO, & SRT-4 automobiles and not just the drivers. I expect that they were owners of something expensive & non-japanese but slow because he stated all the EVO's or SRT-4 talk but never race which is completely false & usually owners of expensive vehicles are the ones that particularily hate getting smoked by lesser vehicles. There are quite a few 11 second EVO's in the US. Road & Track even compared an MR to a Porsche Cayman S around a track and the EVO smoked it all while being easier to drive. I mean we all know the SRT-4 is a Neon but calling it slow like he does is kind of ignorant.

[T78Supra1]

To be honest i think his Hatred with the STI and EVO is the fact his G35/350Z has no turbo..or AWD.

But as for the drivers i am guilty in an STI every day is a race day.

Nothing is more fun then finding an empty parking lot on a snow day and ripping through piles of snow.:burnout:

The car they seem to be missing is hummer drivers....Always riding my ass when i am in a playground zone

[tentacles]

I shit you not but there are threads like "My SRT-4 vs 911 Turbo. Can I take him?" and people will say with your mods you should be able to take him or a driver's race to the least, 911's are heavy & overrated.

So......did you win? :D

[projekz]

Originally posted by Supa Dexta
stratus/sebring convertible should have made that list.. ha

I get a kick out of most people that drive those, they are always the first ones out in the spring and the last ones to put them away in the fall, and the only ones that drive around with the top down on cold shitty days, thinking they are king shit...

:burnout:


That is so true...I used to see some guy driving around on sunny winter days with his tuque on at -10. I asked him if it wasn't too cold to have the top down...he said" I've got heated seats":rofl: :rofl:

[heavyD]

Originally posted by tentacles
So......did you win? :D

I rarely see 911 turbos let alone race them with my Neon so no. That said I am a born winner so who knows.:dunno:

[Charon]

Originally posted by harv91
i think that the guy who made this article up is just pissed cuz he takes the bus all day and those were the cars that laughed at him for takin the bus :guns:

Anyone laughing at someone because they take a bus and dont drive a nice car. Is a douchebag!!

[403Gemini]

Originally posted by heavyD
Ha Ha. I knew before I read that the SRT-4 would be #1 because it's largely true. I don't even frequent the srtforums much anymore because I can't handle the idiots that think the car is an incredible machine &amp; comparable to a Ferrari. I shit you not but there are threads like &quot;My SRT-4 vs 911 Turbo. Can I take him?&quot; and people will say with your mods you should be able to take him or a driver's race to the least, 911's are heavy &amp; overrated. It's completely ridiculous.

I agree with the list mostly but whomever originally wrote the article seemed to have a specific hatred for the STi, EVO, &amp; SRT-4 automobiles and not just the drivers. I expect that they were owners of something expensive &amp; non-japanese but slow because he stated all the EVO's or SRT-4 talk but never race which is completely false &amp; usually owners of expensive vehicles are the ones that particularily hate getting smoked by lesser vehicles. There are quite a few 11 second EVO's in the US. Road &amp; Track even compared an MR to a Porsche Cayman S around a track and the EVO smoked it all while being easier to drive. I mean we all know the SRT-4 is a Neon but calling it slow like he does is kind of ignorant.

OH MAN not to trash my community, but on cobalt forums (bspot can probably back this up haha) all i ever see is "raced a c06 with my stage 2!! OMG!!!" or "beat a saleen mustang with K&N drop in filter! ROFL!!!"

its just ridiculous. Ill admit my cars QUICK but nowhere by any means fast ;)

[Orbie]

Originally posted by heavyD
There are quite a few 11 second EVO's in the US. Road &amp; Track even compared an MR to a Porsche Cayman S around a track and the EVO smoked it all while being easier to drive.

What!? I agree with what you said about the SRT-4 but I have that issue and the best times were 1:26.2 Evo vs. 1:26.5 Cayman on a short track that favored the Evo's AWD and low torque, I wouldn't call 0.3 seconds "smoked" I would say that's pretty damn close! The summary of the article is basically that the MR is an easier car to drive fast and that yes it can hang with a Cayman S. All the other compliments are passed the Porsche's way. But for a car that costs half the price of a Cayman, it's performance was definitely impressive, but taking the whole package together and with the dough I wouldn't be taking an Evo.

[l/l/rX]

Originally posted by DuPont
..3 Subaru STi: The douchebag mobile for the 21st century is here. Complete with a simulated penis enlarging function that gives the owners of these fugly shopping carts with engines the feeling they are more masculine than they truely are. Again spouting claims of jealous or inability to afford a cheap japanese import, the drivers of these cars are the first all-weather douchebags of the list. Because of mass advertising campaigns, the pinheaded morons driving these cars seem to think that any day, rain, snow, shine, or 3&quot; of glaze ice is race day and will not hesitate to prove this to you, even if it means slamming into a telephone pole on a winter day. On top of that, the turbocharged engine gives these twats a sense of superiority over other vehicles that don't have turbochargers. The douchebags brag about these fascinating pieces of technology, even if they haven't a clue how they work.


LOL YES, i pretend or im pretty much like petter solberg everytime i get behind the wheel of our WRX. rain, snow, dry, ice, fair game! except i have never crashed into a telephone pole before cuuuz you know, im just as GOOD as petter solberg. (as stated earlier)
:rofl:
haha but yes, any type of weather is a race day haha. awsome.

[black_radiation]

Yes I do drive a lifted dodge, yes I do display redneck on my tailgate, no I do not have a gun rack, no I do not tailgate people :) and and just because I got to my cousin before you did doesnt mean you gotta be hatin :P

I gotta admit though there is alot of "douchebags" driving hemi's nowadays they think they are hot shit and it brings a bad name to us dodge drivers who dont drive like total assholes, same with any car though such a civic, which in fact I did once one that I had all done up, but again, I wasnt the one driving like an asshole it was others bringing a bad rep to our name. all I know is how I drive vs douchebags but do not think i wont hesitate to tailgate said douchebag for almost taking out my truck whether it be another dodge or somebody who drives a white STI with cf wing and hood... I will find you and run you down you little asshole :)

[riceeater]

Originally posted by Orbie


What!? I agree with what you said about the SRT-4 but I have that issue and the best times were 1:26.2 Evo vs. 1:26.5 Cayman on a short track that favored the Evo's AWD and low torque, I wouldn't call 0.3 seconds &quot;smoked&quot; I would say that's pretty damn close! The summary of the article is basically that the MR is an easier car to drive fast and that yes it can hang with a Cayman S. All the other compliments are passed the Porsche's way. But for a car that costs half the price of a Cayman, it's performance was definitely impressive, but taking the whole package together and with the dough I wouldn't be taking an Evo.

have you seen Jeremy Clarkson do one finger powerslides in the EVO MR on Top Gear? that says it all, at least for me... also, he raced it against a lambo and it outhandled that too :thumbsup:

[VW02]

.
Swap civic and srt-4 simply because that neon will eat a civic up regardless of how gay it is(and regardless of what civic owners think).


no, srt-4 are just too gay, there comes a point where looks do matter. Sure lets say the srt-4 can beat the civic, but you would be driving one of the most hideous cars in the world, and you should feel very very ashamed

[heavyD]

Originally posted by Orbie


What!? I agree with what you said about the SRT-4 but I have that issue and the best times were 1:26.2 Evo vs. 1:26.5 Cayman on a short track that favored the Evo's AWD and low torque, I wouldn't call 0.3 seconds &quot;smoked&quot; I would say that's pretty damn close! The summary of the article is basically that the MR is an easier car to drive fast and that yes it can hang with a Cayman S. All the other compliments are passed the Porsche's way. But for a car that costs half the price of a Cayman, it's performance was definitely impressive, but taking the whole package together and with the dough I wouldn't be taking an Evo.

The EVO is is faster, handles better, is easier to drive, and is almost half the price. I dunno but that sounds pretty convincing to me. I would take the EVO and the cash because I'm not into buying cars based on their badge only. I'm just not into paying copious amounts of money on a Porsche-lite that can barely hang with an EVO.

[heavyD]

Originally posted by VW02
.


no, srt-4 are just too gay, there comes a point where looks do matter. Sure lets say the srt-4 can beat the civic, but you would be driving one of the most hideous cars in the world, and you should feel very very ashamed

Funny I'm not ashamed at all. It's just a car. If you are so pathetic that you need your car to prop up your self-esteem & self worth, then I feel sorry for you.:thumbsdow

[Orbie]

Originally posted by riceeater


have you seen Jeremy Clarkson do one finger powerslides in the EVO MR on Top Gear? that says it all, at least for me... also, he raced it against a lambo and it outhandled that too :thumbsup:

That's fine for Jeremy Clarkson, but we're talking about the specific article that HeavyD has referenced. Here are some handling stats from that article:

EVO MR skidpad: 0.89g
Cayman S skidpad: 0.98g

EVO MR slalom: 70.7mph
Cayman S slalom: 74.2mph (which they mention as faster then a Ferrari Enzo)



Originally posted by heavyD

The EVO is is faster, handles better, is easier to drive, and is almost half the price. I dunno but that sounds pretty convincing to me. I would take the EVO and the cash because I'm not into buying cars based on their badge only. I'm just not into paying copious amounts of money on a Porsche-lite that can barely hang with an EVO.

Again referencing the article in which the Cayman S was "smoked":
EVO MR
0-60mph 4.6s
1/4 mile: 13.4s
0-100mph: 12.4s

Cayman S
0-60mph: 4.8s
1/4 mile: 13.3s
0-100mph: 11.4s

The only thing the article supports that your saying is that it is easier to drive and indeed half the price, which doesn't convince me at all. Of course this is an article and real world results will vary, but generally talking about daily drivers between the two I would take the Cayman because I'm not into hollowed out cars that are all engine. There's more to a car then just speed. If I'm going to spend money on a car I want the part that I'm going to look at 90% of the time to be up to par with the rest of the car not the interior of a $15,000 POS. If I was racing it that would be a different story but I wouldn't be so to each his own.

[whyexactly]

Originally posted by glennc
Lets add a REAL number one to that list.

Nissan 350z/G35: As if number 2 the evo wasnt enough douchebaggery for you, topping the list is the 350z. Drivers of these volkswagen beetle rip-offs tend to think that ripping along in rushhour traffic to get to the front of the line is the only way to live. For these dilusional drivers saving 2 seconds on a trip to and from the dealership to get an OEM distributor cap that will make mad horses is just a part of life. Tinted front and side windows often provide that little extra security just so everyone driving past cant see how much of a douche is hidden within. With these douches youll often find they will in fact try to race you, pull ahead, realise there are a set of horrible train tracks and almost lose it before the next red light (true story). Well aware of the aero-dynamics of their aparantly sleek rides, these middleaged mcdicks managers actually beilive that having an elongated beetle makes them faster. Prone to horrible taste in 19 inch rims and lips, the breed of drivers that flock to these cars clearly top the list of .douche-bag-bagery-ish-nis

I saw a nice looking Z cruising along (full kit, paint, etc) that went over a speedbump. The whole body kit just dropped off. Guy was mad pissed. Funny as hell for everyone else.

[team_fc3s]

HAHAHAHAH that list is awesome!!!!:D

[sullygully]

I really need to sell the neon......damnit, I own a e30 too. I guess you can call me double douche

[Mr. Burns]

The reality of it is 98% of the people on here are douchebags regardless of the car they drive.

[Police]

Originally posted by viffer
I can't believe Jetta didn't make the list.

:werd: :werd: :werd:

jettas and golfs, these idiots need to be shot.