Corrupt-A-Wish

[Sykes]

I saw this started in another forum and thought it would be cool to it here. Let's see what we can come up with!

Directions:

Write a wish.
The next person to reply grants your wish, but there's a consequence to it...
he/she then writes another wish, which the next person corrupts.

Example:
1st person: I wish I had X-Ray Vision.
2nd person: Granted, but it only works in nursing homes.

I'll start.

I wish I could go back in time and undo my mistakes in life.

[arian_ma]

Granted, but you will make new, worse mistakes.

[DNSDJS]

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[the_new_santa1]

Granted, but you must have a sexual encounter with a lady over the age of 90 first...

I wish i would of never met my first girl friend.

[MintRacer]

Originally posted by the_new_santa1
Granted, but you must have a sexual encounter with a lady over the age of 90 first...

I wish i would of never met my first girl friend.

granted, but you will marry your first boy friend.

I wish I could go back in time and punch all the bullys in school right in the face.

[the_new_santa1]

Granted, but first you have to let all those bullys give your gf face...

I wish i didnt make some of the choices i made in life with drugs and such....

[JRSC00LUDE]

Originally posted by the_new_santa1
Granted, but first you have to let all those bullys give your gf face...

I wish i didnt make some of the choices i made in life with drugs and such....

Granted but now you'll blow those flames out of your ass every time you get excited by a hot woman.

I wish I would have went to school more when I was young.

[shakalaka]

Granted, but you won't be able to come out with a degree.

I wish, the world was free of all the hate, and there was no such thing as wars and crime.

[projekz]

granted but you'll have to narrate your whole life from now on!

I wish my house was paid off!

[the_new_santa1]

Granted, but you have to let me move in...

I wish that theft was non existant, and that no one would steal my shit....

[JRSC00LUDE]

Originally posted by the_new_santa1
Granted, but you have to let me move in...

I wish that theft was non existant, and that no one would steal my shit....

Granted but now you own nothing worth stealing.

I wish I would win the lottery this weekend.

[spikerS]

granted, but now your bank account is frozen by revenue canada.

I wish i could afford to buy a house in Calgary.

[Sykes]

Granted, but you would have to give all of it to me.

I wish I didn't have this crazy farmers tan

*EDIT: Spikers beat me to it!

[projekz]

Granted but your skin will fall off!

I wish I didn't have to work anymore

[Jlude]

Originally posted by the_new_santa1
Granted, but you have to let me move in...

I wish that theft was non existant, and that no one would steal my shit....


Granted, but from now on you will address everyone as "master of the universe".

I wish my gf would not get jealous of my car.

[KRyn]

Granted but now you have to drive a Tempo for the rest of your life.

I wish I was supreme ruler of the world.

[Sykes]

Granted, but everybody hates you and they kill you in your sleep.

I wish I finally owned an R6

[the_new_santa1]

granted, but the day you get it you will shoot a rod into the pan.....
I wish i had an srt-4...

[The Cosworth]

granted, but then you become a squid and crash it on the first day

I wish I could dictate my career within my company instead of letting someone else tell me where I am going next.

[KuruptEX]

grant yet instead ur gay

i wish i had my dream car

[Sykes]

Granted, but you still get beat by a Honda Civic

I wish I could travel the world.

[KuruptEX]

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[shakalaka]

Originally posted by Sykes
Granted, but you still get beat by a Honda Civic

I wish I could travel the world.


Granted, but then you end up spending all your money and become a hobo for rest of your life.

I wish their were no hobo's/homeless.

[KRyn]

Granted but you smell like one for the rest of your life.

"I wish I was little bit taller
I wish I was a baller
I wish I had a girl who looked good
I would call her
I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat
And a '64 Impala"

[the_new_santa1]

granted, but u get one wish not like 6 so ur gay...

I wish tires where cheaper....

[DNSDJS]

Originally posted by KRyn
Granted but you smell like one for the rest of your life.

"I wish I was little bit taller
I wish I was a baller
I wish I had a girl who looked good
I would call her
I wish I had a rabbit in a hat with a bat
And a '64 Impala"



Granted

But after your get it all, you lose your legs in an accident, you get jumped and hospitalized for tryin to hustle someone, your girl leaves you and becomes a lesbian, your rabbit dies of hunger and your car gets impounded.


:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:


I wish this thread would never end.:rofl:

[Sykes]

Granted, but you will only post in this thread for the rest of your life.

I wish I had a working car.

[DNSDJS]

Originally posted by Sykes
Granted, but you will only post in this thread for the rest of your life.

I wish I had a working car.


Granted

But now your broke.


I wish the weather would stay like this forever

[calgarygts]

Granted but then you get skin cancer.

I wish it was friday.

[DNSDJS]

Granted
But you have to work on Sat & Sunday then.

I wish Mario would catch the Yoshi theif.

[Sykes]

Granted, but you spend it scrubbing crustys off toilet bowls.

I wish all the typing in this thread would get me back into shape.

[DepTrotter]

granted but you lose all your limbs in a freak beach volleyball accident

i wish i didn't skip so much school back in the day...

edit fuck i was answering DJNDSJANJSJHDZZQQR's response in regards to the weather

[reiRei]

Granted, but now you have to chase the yoshi forever

I wish I had some waffles

*edit: Dammit! I'm slow*

[Sykes]

Originally posted by DepTrotter
edit fuck i was answering DJNDSJANJSJHDZZQQR's response in regards to the weather

:rofl:
Just pickup pickup where the last one left off :D

[JRSC00LUDE]

Originally posted by reiRei
I wish I had some waffles



Granted but I stole your lancer while you were stuffing your face with them.

I wish all of shakalaka's wishes would come true because he's being serious about them.

[reiRei]

Granted, but now.. you're a woman

I wish I could turbo my now stolen lancer

[LuxCars]

Granted but it will cost you everything you have.

i wish i was a moderator.

[KRyn]

Granted but I have to be made one as well.

I wish the work day was over.

[LuxCars]

Granted but you cant be a moderator.

i wish i had endless wishes

[adam c]

granted. but the more wishes u make the smaller ur penis becomes

i wish life was easier

[reiRei]

granted, but now your poo will be hard

I wish for one billion dollars

[l/l/rX]

Originally posted by reiRei
granted, but now your poo will be hard

I wish for one billion dollars

granted, but ill come kill you and steal all your shit.

i wish to have sex in the office one day.

[adam c]

granted. but its with the bosses 90 yo mother

i wish my poo wasnt hard

[nagooro]

Granted but you get it in bags of pennies which you must roll by hand.

I wish I owned a helicopter.

edit..you guys are to fast.

[l/l/rX]

Originally posted by adam c
granted. but its with the bosses 90 yo mother

i wish my poo wasnt hard

granted, but the poo that does come out of your ass, creates a huge gaping hole and its very painful

i have no wish at the moment

[Sykes]

Granted. It's a toy one I bought from eBay for 0.99

I wish I was with my fiancee who is in Toronto for the next couple of weeks.

EDIT: This one was for the Helicopter

[l/l/rX]

Originally posted by Sykes
Granted. It's a toy one I bought from eBay for 0.99

I wish I was with my fiancee who is in Toronto for the next couple of weeks.

granted, but shes sleeping with someone else at the moment.

i wish i was boning your fiancee...sorry low blow? haha

[malaekat]

Sykes by any chance did you spot this game on CAD forum?

[Sykes]

Granted. But Lorena Bobitt cuts off your penis before you can... haha

I wish I had a sweet job.

EDIT: Haha.. This was for the comment about my fiancee. You should forever burn for that one :eek:

[malaekat]

Granted... what you thought was a sweet job turned out to be cleaning a honey wagon(septic truck in case the term eludes you)

I wish I was behind the drivers wheel of a big rig right now

[adam c]

Originally posted by Sykes
Granted. But Lorena Bobitt cuts off your penis before you can... haha

I wish I had a sweet job.

EDIT: Haha.. This was for the comment about my fiancee. You should forever burn for that one... :rofl:

granted but u have to take it up the ass by ron jeremy every 2 hours

i wish my boss wasn't such a bitch

[l/l/rX]

Originally posted by Sykes


EDIT: Haha.. This was for the comment about my fiancee. You should forever burn for that one :eek:

hahaha sorry, its all fun n games right? :D

[l/l/rX]

Originally posted by adam c


granted but u have to take it up the ass by ron jeremy every 2 hours

i wish my boss wasn't such a bitch

granted, but even so you're still his/her bitch.

i wish i wasnt so bored @ home.

[malaekat]

Sykes i wouldn't be too offend by his wish to bone your finacee he just wants to do your bank rep isn't that what a 'finacee' is. Now if he had said fiancee you would have good reason to be offended. Guess its all in the spelling huh:rofl:

[Sykes]

Originally posted by l/l/rX


hahaha sorry, its all fun n games right? :D

Haha.. no worries dude. I kinda opened myself up for that one.

malaekat: I got this off another Integra forum

[l/l/rX]

Originally posted by malaekat
Sykes i wouldn't be too offend by his wish to bone your finacee he just wants to do your bank rep isn't that what a 'finacee' is. Now if he had said fiancee you would have good reason to be offended. Guess its all in the spelling huh:rofl:

edit...:D ;)

[malaekat]

Granted... but now your bored in public and look like a moron.

I wish I had a million dollars.

[Sykes]

Originally posted by malaekat
Sykes i wouldn't be too offend by his wish to bone your finacee he just wants to do your bank rep isn't that what a 'finacee' is. Now if he had said fiancee you would have good reason to be offended. Guess its all in the spelling huh:rofl:

HA! I didn't even notice! :rofl:

[malaekat]

we could all edit but where would the fun be in that?:nut:

[l/l/rX]

Originally posted by malaekat
we could all edit but where would the fun be in that?:nut:

YOU RUIN EVERYTHING! haha...

i wish malaekat wasnt sucha ass, n ruins my fun! =P

[Sykes]

Originally posted by malaekat
Granted... but now your bored in public and look like a moron.

I wish I had a million dollars.

Granted, but you'd have to give it all to me

I wish I had a BBQ fired up in the back with steaks on the grill

[malaekat]

Granted... however you are a much bigger ass than Malaekat.

I wish people didn't get so pissy.

[JRSC00LUDE]

Originally posted by Sykes


Granted, but you'd have to give it all to me

I wish I had a BBQ fired up in the back with steaks on the grill

Granted but you would overcook them and they would be dry and tough.

I wish I could finally pull a tailwhip at the skatepark.

[l/l/rX]

Originally posted by JRSC00LUDE


Granted but you would overcook them and they would be dry and tough.

I wish I could finally pull a tailwhip at the skatepark.

granted, but even when doing so, your leg gets caught in your bike and you break it soo badly you'll never be able to ride again.

i wish i had a smoke.

edit: im just a cruel bastard in this thread huh?

[reiRei]

granted, but now you have cancer

I wish I could enjoy Mister Mark Whalberg

[Sykes]

Granted. But you get arrested for having your mistress "tailwhip" you with her leather whip in public.

I wish I had robot legs.

[JRSC00LUDE]

Originally posted by Sykes
Granted. But you get arrested for having your mistress "tailwhip" you with her leather whip in public.

I wish I had robot legs.

Granted but they're JDM and you have trouble turning left and you fall down and smash your head on a rock and become retarded.

I wish l/l/rX wasn't so cruel!




edit (too bad reiRei - I already am!)

[reiRei]

Granted, but now you're a soulless bastard

I wish for my own racing helmet

[Hit Em Up]

Granted, but now u have no head

i wish i could marry jessica alba

[l/l/rX]

Originally posted by reiRei
Granted, but now you're a soulless bastard

I wish for my own racing helmet

granted, but its not snell rated and you get into a horrific crash and you die because the helmet wasnt snell 95 hehe

i wish for some sushi.

[reiRei]

Granted, but the sushi you get is fugu, and you get the poison bits

I wish I was a blood sucking zombie

[JRSC00LUDE]

Originally posted by Hit Em Up
Granted, but now u have no head

i wish i could marry jessica alba

Granted but she refuses to ever, ever have sex with you or see her naked.

I wish reiRei could have her smashed head back, it's likely cute!


(nice guy for a soulless bastard hey?)

[l/l/rX]

Originally posted by reiRei
Granted, but the sushi you get is fugu, and you get the poison bits

I wish I was a blood sucking zombie

granted, but you suck someones blood that was aids infected, and eventually you die.

i wish people would be more original in this thread with their corruptions for the wishes.

[malaekat]

Granted... but the only blood you can find is blood oranges so you starve to death.

I wish I had a Mega Burger right now.

[Sykes]

Originally posted by l/l/rX
i wish people would be more original in this thread with their corruptions for the wishes.

I can't corrupt that. I wish that too! Haha...

[reiRei]

Granted, but now you're a toast eating toaster from hell...

I wish that it was 6:30 so I can go to my dance class

[boxer23]

granted, but your dance class become thwarted by a group of flaming homosexuals, and for the first time in ur life, u felt like u belonged

I wish I wasnt so bored

[coolme]

Originally posted by boxer23
granted, but your dance class become thwarted by a group of flaming homosexuals, and for the first time in ur life, u felt like u belonged

I wish I wasnt so bored

Granted, but you'll never sleep again.

I wish there's more than 24 hours a day.

[reiRei]

granted, but now you have to work 20 hours a day

I wish people would stop looking at my chest

[Newmz]

Granted, but you will no longer have brests, infact it'll be a mans chest auston powers style.

I wish i could pull a 100 dollar bill out of my pocket every time i reach into it.

[spec c]

Originally posted by reiRei
granted, but now you have to work 20 hours a day

I wish people would stop looking at my chest

granted, but now they'll think you're a tranny.

i wish i didnt eat at taco bell today

EDIT: ^ was to fast

[Newmz]

Granted but now you will eat mcdonalds instead making the side affects 2 X worse :eek:

I wish i was the only guy on earth!

[reiRei]

granted, but the only women will be the ones that look like dame edna

I wish that my lancer was an evo

[Darkane]

Originally posted by spec c


granted, but now they'll think you're a tranny.

i wish i didnt eat at taco bell today

EDIT: ^ was to fast

Granted, you ate but you still have the Runs.

I wish to be Above God.

[Sykes]

Granted, but there is nobody that can be above God so you end up sharing the same fate as Satan and will burn in a pit of sulphur.

I wish I had a set of Enkei RPF-1's.

[Newmz]

Granted But you no longer have a car to put them on

I wish someone would grant a wish in a nice way :-o

[reiRei]

Granted, but now you have to make another wish

I wish I had money for a turbo

[Newmz]

Granted but you'll be putting it in my car :-o
I wish that lancer girl would actually buy me a new turbo!

[LuxCars]

Granted, but then you must give her you car.

I wish to go to the washroom

[spec c]

Originally posted by LuxCars
Granted, but then you must give her you car.

I wish to go to the washroom

granted, but while in there you'll be raped by a tall fat trucker named gus

i wish i had pepto bismol

[Newmz]

granted but it's expired and growing mold...

I wish i could be perfectly healthy!

[Sykes]

Granted, but you will die 24 hours later.

I wish I had some more Mach Fusion blades

[Spoons]

Originally posted by Sykes
Granted, but you will die 24 hours later.

I wish I had some more Mach Fusion blades

Granted, but you will cut your throat shaving.

I wish I owned a Ferrari

[viperous]

Originally posted by Sykes

Granted, but you will cut your throat shaving.

I wish I owned a Ferrari


Granted, but I will end up stealing it

I wish to successfully blow up the Sun

[Sykes]

EDIT: This was for the sun

Granted, but your eyeballs will be burned out just before you're about to blow it up causing you to miss and end up blowing up your neighbors cat.

I wish I was the greatest chef in the world.

[viperous]

Originally posted by Sykes
EDIT: This was for the sun

^^:rofl:

Granted, but you eyeballs will be burned out just before you're about to blow it up causing you to miss and end up blowing up your neighbors cat.

I wish I was the greatest chef in the world.

Granted, but you end up chopping off your arms in the meat slicer.

I wish I could create a rift in space that everyone falls into...except for me...and the planet earth

[spec c]

Originally posted by viperous


Granted, but you end up chopping off your arms in the meat slicer.

I wish I could create a rift in space that everyone falls into...except for me...and the planet earth

granted, but you've sucked all the women into that rift so you've been reduced to a life of giving yourself strangers.

i wish i went with shaw instead of telus, my internet sucks

[JRSC00LUDE]

Granted but now you're computer illiterate.

I wish someone pointed me to a thread explaing how that whole spec c issue worked out awhile ago. ;)


edited because I am spelling illiterate!

[viperous]

Originally posted by JRSC00LUDE
Granted but now you'er computer illiterate.

I wish someone pointed my to a thread explaing how that whole spec c issue worked out awhile ago. ;)

Granted, ...your internet dies before you can read the thread.

I wish I could travel back in time 3 days into the past so I can end up not missing my doctor's appointment

[l/l/rX]

Originally posted by viperous


Granted, ...your internet dies before you can read the thread.

I wish I could travel back in time 3 days into the past so I can end up not missing my doctor's appointment

granted, you still have aids though.

i wish my brother and his stupid friends wouldnt put their hands on the windows, pain in the ass to clean.