newbie

[essexbird]

hiya my names claire, i live in a place called essex in good old sunny England!!
through one of the forums ova here i found out about this one and decided to join
:)

[Supa Dexta]

Cool, welcome aboard. We talk a lot of shit but are pretty harmless. :)

[l/l/rX]

:drool: :drool: ship over some fish n chips...make sure its wrapped in the newspaper pleeeeeeeeeeeeeease!!!

mmm fish n chiiiiiips :drool: as you can tell, im really hungry at the moment.

welcome!

[essexbird]

unfortunately they dont wrap them up in newspaper anymore,
apparently the press ink is bad for you!!!!!!!! lol

[BigBearWest]

Welcome

[hoamic11]

Hey Claire, welcome to beyond and enjoy your stay:)

[GiangZilla]

Welcome!

[Jlude]

No one has said it yet? I'm dissapointed!:rolleyes:

[z24_wheels]

this thread is useless w/o pics...

[300zxfairlday]

PICSSSSSSSSSS

[badatusrnames]

Hi Claire and welcome to the board!

Pics?

[shakalaka]

If you guys insist hard enough there might as well be some pics.

Apparently Essex girls have bit of a 'reputation' here, so to speak.

Claire might be different however. Welcome either way. lol:thumbsup:

[kerry]

Welcome to our hilarious website.

*waits for EK's greeting*

[DJ Lazy]

Enjoy your time on beyond. :)

[shakalaka]

Originally posted by DJ Lazy
Isn't Essex the capital city of sluts in England? :dunno: Just what I've heard.


Enjoy your time on beyond. :)

hahah

I was just trying to say that nicely man! lol

[DJ Lazy]

Originally posted by shakalaka


hahah

I was just trying to say that nicely man! lol

Yea, My ninja edit wasn't fast enough after I saw your post... :rofl:

[shakalaka]

Originally posted by DJ Lazy


Yea, My ninja edit wasn't fast enough after I saw your post... :rofl:


hahah

I am sure she won't mind. :rofl:

[Destinova403]

lol... welcome to Beyond, just ignore them.

[badatusrnames]

Originally posted by Destinova403
lol... welcome to Beyond, just ignore them.

Trying to play the nice guy angle??

[Destinova403]

Originally posted by badatusrnames


Trying to play the nice guy angle??

SHHHHH youll give me away.

[ExOz]

Essex? Damn, poor girl....

Welcome in. My sister and her husband lives in Essex. Fuck I hate my sister... she belongs there, lol, but that's another story for another day. Where abouts in Essex are you currently serving time?

[essexbird]

Wow the essex reputation is known worldwide im impressed!!!

sorry to dissapoint you guys, but im not a typical essexgirl, im not that easy i wait until theyve bought me an expensive gift first lol

the part of essex i come from is southend on sea its not that bad really, londons worse lol

[JordanEG6]

Welcome :D


Originally posted by kerry
Welcome to our hilarious website.

*waits for EK's greeting*

I was scrolling up and down for his name...hmm...off the ball? Hahaha.

[ExOz]

Originally posted by essexbird


sorry to dissapoint you guys, but im not a typical essexgirl, im not that easy i wait until theyve bought me an expensive gift first lol



Uhm, that's the typical Essex I know. :rolleyes:

[badatusrnames]

Ripped from, oddly enough - wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Essex_girl). No offense Claire:

1) An Essex girl is driving down the A13 when her car phone rings. It's her boyfriend, urgently warning her, "Treacle, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on the A13. Please be careful! "It's not just one car!" shrieks the Essex girl, "There's hundreds of them!"

2) An Essex girl is involved in a nasty car crash and is trapped and bleeding. The paramedics soon arrive on site.
Medic: It's OK I'm a paramedic and I'm going to ask you some questions.
Girl: OK
Medic: What's your name?
Girl: Sharon
Medic: OK Sharon, is this your car?
Sharon: Yes
Medic: Where are you bleeding from?
Sharon: Romford, mate!

3) How does an Essex girl turn off the lights when she has sex?
She shuts the car door.

4) What does an Essex girl put behind her ears to make her more attractive? Her Ankles.

5) What's the difference between the Titanic and an Essex Girl? You know how many men went down on the Titanic.

6) How do you know when an Essex girl is having an orgasm? She drops her bag of chips.

7) What's an Essex girl's favourite wine? "Ohhh, please, can we go to lakeside?"

[l/l/rX]

Originally posted by badatusrnames
Ripped from, oddly enough - wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Essex_girl). No offense Claire:

1) An Essex girl is driving down the A13 when her car phone rings. It's her boyfriend, urgently warning her, "Treacle, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on the A13. Please be careful! "It's not just one car!" shrieks the Essex girl, "There's hundreds of them!"

2) An Essex girl is involved in a nasty car crash and is trapped and bleeding. The paramedics soon arrive on site.
Medic: It's OK I'm a paramedic and I'm going to ask you some questions.
Girl: OK
Medic: What's your name?
Girl: Sharon
Medic: OK Sharon, is this your car?
Sharon: Yes
Medic: Where are you bleeding from?
Sharon: Romford, mate!

3) How does an Essex girl turn off the lights when she has sex?
She shuts the car door.

4) What does an Essex girl put behind her ears to make her more attractive? Her Ankles.

5) What's the difference between the Titanic and an Essex Girl? You know how many men went down on the Titanic.

6) How do you know when an Essex girl is having an orgasm? She drops her bag of chips.

7) What's an Essex girl's favourite wine? "Ohhh, please, can we go to lakeside?"

LOOOOOOOOL :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:


Originally posted by essexbird

unfortunately they dont wrap them up in newspaper anymore,
apparently the press ink is bad for you!!!!!!!! lol

aww thats too bad, i really wanted some like that. haha. whatever i still i want to go to london/ essex in particular and grab some fish n chips...next summer!

[TomcoPDR]

Welcome to Beyond, enjoy your stay here.

[2002civic]

welcome!:thumbsup:

[shakalaka]

Haha I have another one from one of my text messages

an Essex girl furious at her bf says, how dare you call me a slapper get the fuck out of my bed...and take your damn mates with you as well.

[essexbird]

Originally posted by ExOz


Uhm, that's the typical Essex I know. :rolleyes:


im only joking im not like that really. Im one of the only few people from essex who isnt a slut, im not totally fridged either tho lol

[essexbird]

The jokes are quite good........ i heard worse, it dont bother me tho :) :)

[ExOz]

lol, nothing like my sister then!!!!

[EK 2.0]

Originally posted by kerry

*waits for EK's greeting*

Hi Kerry...haha...



Originally posted by JordanEG6

I was scrolling up and down for his name...hmm...off the ball? Hahaha.


Nope, just let her meet all the skeeves first...then I swoop in with my English charm and like a broom, sweep her off of her feet...lol



Hello essexbird, my name is Arif. As you might have already noticed, my legend precedes me. I am sure you already have a few pm's asking more about you, like what your name is, what your interests are, and who you be with. Maybe even what numbers to dial, and if you are gonna be here for a while...

But, having said that I would like to just genuinely welcome you to our very entertaining site. I will warn you to stay away from about 99% of the guys on the site, as about 99% of the females can vouch haha...

If you need anything here, a tour, questions answered, an annoying user banned, threads moved or closed then I am your Mod. So just holla if you need anything, and once again welcome and I hope you enjoy all the time you will end up spending here...

[essexbird]

thanks EK :)

Im sure everyones gonna be nice and gentle with me, ive not come across anyone nasty yet :thumbsup:

[xLostx]

uhhh I'm here for the gang bang

[badatusrnames]

Originally posted by xLostx
uhhh I'm here for the gang bang

Apparently, we're supposed to buy her a gift first...

[Lex350]

Originally posted by xLostx
uhhh I'm here for the gang bang

now that's funny.

[essexbird]

Originally posted by badatusrnames


Apparently, we're supposed to buy her a gift first...

its got to be BIG and expensive!!!! lol

[xLostx]

*looks in pants*

i got the first part covered, how much cash you got?

[essexbird]

lmfao :rofl:

[kamatayan]

am i too late