Hello Ladies of the Internets

[Zephyr]

http://i43.tinypic.com/2cpokyr.jpg

http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/tor/881177993.html

Searching didn't see a another thread...I think..

but wow, this is one of your fellow Canadians :rofl:

[GingeRRRBeef]

He should make a POF page.

[EK 2.0]

man that motherfucker took my idea...

[badatusrnames]

I thought you were a girl?

[semograd]

This appears to describe all Canadian males to a tee.

[Destinova403]

wow... win.

the real question is... will it work?
im sure theres an ugly asian somewhere whos obsessed with anime who will settle for him

[R154]

ERTW

[2jzgte]

Beggers can be choosers.

[badatusrnames]

Originally posted by Destinova403
wow... win.

the real question is... will it work?
im sure theres an ugly asian somewhere whos obsessed with anime who will settle for him

Thought of this:

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/asian_teen_has_sweaty_middle_aged


Asian Teen Has Sweaty Middle-Aged-Man Fetish

January 30, 2009 | Issue 45•05

AOMORI, JAPAN—At first glance, 17-year-old Misaki Nakajima seems like any other shy and submissive Japanese schoolgirl. She loves shopping, text messaging, and the color pink. But beneath her wholesome exterior lies a wicked secret: Misaki Nakajima is consumed by sexual fantasies involving sweaty, middle-aged American men.

The shy Japanese nymph enjoys fantasizing about fat fortysomethings with excessive neck and back hair.

"I can't explain it," said Nakajima, dressed in a pleated miniskirt and pure white knee socks. "There's just something about American men who are at least twice my age and nearly three times my body weight that totally drives me wild."

Added Nakajima, "They're so hot."

Though she finds all pasty, middle-aged men intoxicating, Nakajima said balding Midwesterners who carry most of their weight in their stomach particularly turn her on. According to the sexually inquisitive teen, she often daydreams about sleeping with a 43-year-old divorcé with poor hygiene habits.

"I like it when they dress up like middle managers," said Nakajima, twirling her girlish pigtails with one alabaster finger. "You know, with the sweat-stained dress shirts, and the office clipboards, and the khaki pants that are 2 inches too short."
Enlarge Image Teen at computer

Nakajima peruses the Internet for photos to daydream about later.

"God," Nakajima continued. "Those get me every time."

The Japanese nymph then reportedly sighed, rolled over on her Hello Kitty bedsheets, and continued leafing through an old Rochester Big & Tall catalog.

While she has always been curious about men who attended state college before she was born, Nakajima said she first discovered her fetish after stumbling upon a late-night airing of Uncle Buck on television—a moment the teen now describes as her "sexual awakening."

"I was completely captivated by him," said Nakajima, referring to the obese, unemployed character played by John Candy. "He was so exotic-looking. It was like this whole new world of pleasure had just opened up for me."

Over the next several months Nakajima—a virgin—explored her new obsession by cutting out pictures of American men from riding mower advertisements and heart-attack-prevention brochures. The barely legal teen also discovered satellite broadcasts of ESPN2 around this time, and often stayed up all night ogling professional bowlers and competitive dart players.

Nakajima confessed to frequently searching the Internet to satisfy her insatiable appetite for round, greasy American men years past their sexual prime. A survey of her recent browsing history revealed such Google searches as "pale man lying on couch eating" and "retiree + jowls + hardcore." The teen has also bookmarked several sites with lurid pictures of aging American males, including BuffaloBillsFanZone.com and the History Channel chat room.

According to psychologist Asuka Yasuhara of Tokyo University, Nakajima is not alone.

"It's not uncommon for Asian girls to be fascinated with these types of men," said Dr. Yasuhara, who found in a recent survey that three out of 10 Japanese teenage girls list Paul Giamatti as the most attractive American celebrity. "And it's easy to see why. Sweaty, forty-something Caucasians represent the epitome of mystery and wonder to Asian teens."

Added Yasuhara, "Plus, how can anyone resist those enormous, chafed thighs?"

Drawn by her curiosity, Nakajima has scheduled a vacation to St. Louis for early March. The trip—which falls on her 18th birthday—reportedly coincides with the American Society of Actuaries' annual convention, a four-day event during which Nakajima hopes to be seduced by "the heavyset man of [her] dreams."

Although she has long fantasized about traveling overseas and having a world of carnal delights revealed to her by an aging claims adjuster, the taut Japanese teen admitted that she is uncertain how she'll be received by American men.

"I just hope they don't mind the fact that I'm completely shaven," Nakajima said. "Oh, who am I kidding? They'd probably never go for a naïve young sexual kitten like me."

[jsn]

^^ WTF. We've been doing it all wrong??? Why do we work out? We all need to stop exercising and head straight to the nearest Mcdonalds and devour as many big macs as you can without puking. We've been tricked. Those bald, overweight, aging, underacheivers have been doing it right all along.

[TomcoPDR]

Originally posted by Destinova403
wow... win.

the real question is... will it work?
im sure theres an ugly asian somewhere whos obsessed with anime who will settle for a chance for citizenship

Gotta word it truthfully.

[gatorade]

wtf?

[Redlined_8000]

What a player....

[SaturnV]

Nihonese? :rofl: :thumbsdow :banghead:

One of my biggest pet peeves is when people throw in random words from other languages. Please, its not cool. If you want to use it, learn how to speak it, and then go right ahead. :guns:

Nihonese is even worse, why not call them Japanjin? Then you could get mad props for originality.

This was worth a good laugh though.

[sexualbanana]

Originally posted by badatusrnames
I thought you were a girl?

That's probably how he came across the posting. Looking for a suitable mate, are ya Zephyr?

[badatusrnames]

Originally posted by sexualbanana


That's probably how he came across the posting. Looking for a suitable mate, are ya Zephyr?

Ahh makes sense now. I misread, I thought that was Zephyr posting up his/her quest for love...

[googe]

haha, thread title reminded me of this:

http://www.2atoms.com/comedy/worstoftheweb/blount.htm

[A790]

Originally posted by googe
haha, thread title reminded me of this:

http://www.2atoms.com/comedy/worstoftheweb/blount.htm
Whaaaaaaaaaat.....?

[sputnik]

Originally posted by googe
haha, thread title reminded me of this:

http://www.2atoms.com/comedy/worstoftheweb/blount.htm

I remember when that first went viral.

[topmade]

- Traditional Ladies' educationDoes this mean what I think it means?



I must stress again that this is for a SERIOUS, long term relationship. Not some 'fling' as though I were a boy toy to be tossed aside.
http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/tor/881177993.jpg:rofl:

[Generic]

AHAHAHHAAHAHAHHAAH

[scat19]

These types of laughs exist to make everyone else feel better :nut: