Science ponders 'zombie attack'

[el_fefes]

If zombies actually existed, an attack by them would lead to the collapse of civilisation unless dealt with quickly and aggressively.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/8206280.stm

University of Ottawa Study (http://www.mathstat.uottawa.ca/~rsmith/Zombies.pdf)

Hehehe

Discuss.

[Rat Fink]

.

[tarrantas]

I have several friends with numerous guns and I would probably just go find them and fuck some shit up. Then golf clubs and such for "finishers" :werd:

[gam0s]

a samurai sword would be my weapon of choice

[Sugarphreak]

....

[Quizzes]

Originally posted by Sugarphreak
Why did the BBC spell civilization wrong? :dunno:

Do you not realise that BBC is from Britain?

[240SX92]

Originally posted by gam0s
a samurai sword would be my weapon of choice

Cutting weapons get stuck in bodies, unless you're efficient with samurai swords, you're not getting through the neck (to remove the head). Chainsaws are ok, but need gasoline. Ax, hatchet, machete, all get stuck.

Any other place you swipe into, that bad boy will get stuck in the bone / flesh.

Need a blunt weapon like a bat, something that will bust a few heads to split skulls before it breaks, find a new one (blunt objects readily available).

Guns too loud, attract more zombies, must use scenario only.

Fire is inefficient, does not kill till you melt the brain, after about 5 minutes on fire.

Explosions inefficient, blow the limbs off now they crawl and are harder to see, sneak up bite your ankles.

Lasers, not developed yet but probably the best.

[scat19]

Originally posted by 240SX92


Cutting weapons get stuck in bodies, unless you're efficient with samurai swords, you're not getting through the neck (to remove the head). Chainsaws are ok, but need gasoline. Ax, hatchet, machete, all get stuck.

Any other place you swipe into, that bad boy will get stuck in the bone / flesh.

Need a blunt weapon like a bat, something that will bust a few heads to split skulls before it breaks, find a new one (blunt objects readily available).

Guns too loud, attract more zombies, must use scenario only.

Fire is inefficient, does not kill till you melt the brain, after about 5 minutes on fire.

Explosions inefficient, blow the limbs off now they crawl and are harder to see, sneak up bite your ankles.

Lasers, not developed yet but probably the best.

You've really thought this one out, haven't you? :rofl: :rofl:

[Jlude]

Originally posted by scat19


You've really thought this one out, haven't you? :rofl: :rofl:

hahah beat me to it.

sounds like he's been pondering this for years.

[240SX92]

Got to be prepared for when it happens!

Make fun now you'll be banging on my door for help later ;)


:rofl:

[Sugarphreak]

....

[atgilchrist]

Only one answer: chainsaw hand/unlimited ammo shotgun combo!
http://barfblog.foodsafety.ksu.edu/uploads/image/bruce_campbell_army_of_darkness.jpg

[gam0s]

Originally posted by 240SX92


Cutting weapons get stuck in bodies, unless you're efficient with samurai swords, you're not getting through the neck (to remove the head). Chainsaws are ok, but need gasoline. Ax, hatchet, machete, all get stuck.

Any other place you swipe into, that bad boy will get stuck in the bone / flesh.

Need a blunt weapon like a bat, something that will bust a few heads to split skulls before it breaks, find a new one (blunt objects readily available).

Guns too loud, attract more zombies, must use scenario only.

Fire is inefficient, does not kill till you melt the brain, after about 5 minutes on fire.

Explosions inefficient, blow the limbs off now they crawl and are harder to see, sneak up bite your ankles.

Lasers, not developed yet but probably the best.

blunt weapons take to much time and energy. light weapons and hand to hand combat ftw haha

[98type_r]

Zombie Survival Guide (http://www.chapters.indigo.ca/books/Zombie-Survival-Guide-Complete-Protection-Max-Brooks/9781400049622-item.html?ref=Search+Books%3a+%2527Max+Brooks%2527)

[Sugarphreak]

....

[Crymson]

Organize before they rise!

Zombie survival guide is hilarous, i picked up the hard copy a few years ago. Definately a must have purchase for anyone interested in zombies.

[97'Scort]

My Remington 1100 3" Mag with 00 buck :D

[TorqueDog]

Originally posted by Sugarphreak
Everybody has to be a smart ass when you ask the question I suppose; What I didn't realize is that the British had an alternative spelling.:facepalm: You're still failing hard here; realise is also an appropriate spelling of 'realize'.

It's like color/colour, neighbor/neighbour, practice/practise, etc.

[Hakkola]

I kick ass for the lord!

Zombie Apocalypse would be the greatest thing that ever happened to me.

[97'Scort]

http://zhurnal.lib.ru/img/j/jartarow_j_i/omskajaprawdaprahipepel/ks23m.jpg

Russian KS-23 semi-auto shotgun. Has the bore equivalent of ~6 gauge. It's like having a semi-auto hip fired cannon.

Edit: Apparently they make an "improved" version :D KS-23K with 7 round mag:
http://www.army.lt/guns/gallery/K16.jpg

I defy any zombie to resist that!

[bashir26]

http://www.cairnsmowercity.com/images/craftsman%20chainsaw%2035020.jpg
http://www.army-technology.com/projects/olifant/images/olifant_tank1.jpg

Having zombies would be so cool

[n1zm0]

Originally posted by Hakkola
Zombie Apocalypse would be the greatest thing that ever happened to me.

lol +1, i thought there was another thread from 4-5 years ago about zombies, anyways i'd head to my work at the airport with a shitload of canned food, my gun nutty co-worker (who has a nice 'as close as it gets to an M24 in Canada' and 'other' guns) and all the small piston powered aircraft i could ever want/use. air transport, guns and spam . i think that's all i'll need.

[Sugarphreak]

....

[Toma]

The undertones of this study and supposed mathematical model are severely disturbing.

They are using this study to extrapolate the best way to defeat a modern plague or virus like swine flu etc....

They just dressed it up to make a joke of it.... but what they are suggesting is not only certainly mathematically flawed, it is unthinkable,

[ZenOps]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VTbYUd1jUc4

Chainsaw is good, but a flamethrower is better. If years of videogames have tought me anything - Trolls and zombies are still a threat unless you toast 'em.

If Rob Anders were a zombie, he'd try to convert the human race to his zombie idea of perfection. Rob Anders is not a zombie though - Zombies are far whiter than Rob, and thus - much better than Rob.

*which begs the question* Is Rob white enough for himself?

[240SX92]

Originally posted by ZenOps
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VTbYUd1jUc4

Chainsaw is good, but a flamethrower is better. If years of videogames have tought me anything - Trolls and zombies are still a threat unless you toast 'em.

If Rob Anders were a zombie, he'd try to convert the human race to his zombie idea of perfection. Rob Anders is not a zombie though - Zombies are far whiter than Rob, and thus - much better than Rob.

*which begs the question* Is Rob white enough for himself?

Completely wrong. Light a zombie on fire he's still going to come after you, except he'll be on fire which sucks... Unless you're willing to use half a tank on one till they melt after a solid 2 minutes that's a terrible idea.

As for the guy who said "light weapons" what do you qualify as a light weapon? Just be in good shape and a blunt object won't take much energy ;) Doesn't take much energy to swing a bat and nail a baseball over and over does it? Start hitting the batting cages!

Hand to hand combat? IE. A Baseball bat? Haha you think you're going to knock out a zombie with your fists? That's a horrible idea, getting close enough to get bitten? You need the zombie survival guide. While at it get World War Z.

[71car2]

Had seen that guide - Zombie survival guide at a local comic store. Brisking thru it, I find many of the subjects written a load of laughs...but at the same time actually made sense! :rofl:

Would I buy this guide? Naw... after all, zombies are pure fantasy and the movies I've seen are more comedy to me than they were being horror. I had many good guffaws while watching.

Too bad the director isn't making any more new movies - Japan has a great manga called "High School of the Dead" - loads of laughs reading.

[sh0ko]

grenades ftw! and a shit ton of them

or this

http://fragcdo.files.wordpress.com/2007/10/minigun_terror.jpg

[ZenOps]

It does depend on the era of zombie.

Now - if you take a typical 1960's zombie that moves about about 1/10th the speed of a running human - flamethower is best.

If you are faced with a Michael Jackson dancing zombie or one of the new L4D running zombies - Videogames tell me a peashooter will do nothing and that you might just be better off thwacking them with the blunt end of a shotgun at close range.

[GQBalla]

I tried to use the zombie excuse to get registered to have a handgun...

too bad the fiance said no...

sigh

[AaronK]

Originally posted by GQBalla
I tried to use the zombie excuse to get registered to have a handgun...

too bad the fiance said no...

sigh

She must be supporting the zombie uprise.... maybe you should deal with her first.

[240SX92]

Originally posted by ZenOps
It does depend on the era of zombie.

Now - if you take a typical 1960's zombie that moves about about 1/10th the speed of a running human - flamethower is best.

If you are faced with a Michael Jackson dancing zombie or one of the new L4D running zombies - Videogames tell me a peashooter will do nothing and that you might just be better off thwacking them with the blunt end of a shotgun at close range.

Hahah true, except I still think a flamethrower on a slow zombie would do little to nothing. Granted you could probably light them on fire and walk away, but i'd just rather walk away, save resources. Also finding the means to power the thrower, gas, flammable liquid is time consuming and inefficient! Haha I sure hope when the zombie apocalypse comes they will be the typically slow moving, feet dragging ones. Otherwise we're in a wee bit o trouble.

And grenades are bad! They'll just blow limbs off and make the zombies harder to spot, then when you least expect it, BAM ankle bite.

[JohnnyBlaze]

World War Z is a great book

[kbye]

i LOL'd at Professor "Smith?"

[GQBalla]

Originally posted by 240SX92


Cutting weapons get stuck in bodies, unless you're efficient with samurai swords, you're not getting through the neck (to remove the head). Chainsaws are ok, but need gasoline. Ax, hatchet, machete, all get stuck.

Any other place you swipe into, that bad boy will get stuck in the bone / flesh.

Need a blunt weapon like a bat, something that will bust a few heads to split skulls before it breaks, find a new one (blunt objects readily available).

Guns too loud, attract more zombies, must use scenario only.

Fire is inefficient, does not kill till you melt the brain, after about 5 minutes on fire.

Explosions inefficient, blow the limbs off now they crawl and are harder to see, sneak up bite your ankles.

Lasers, not developed yet but probably the best.

lol reminds me of zombie mode in COD

[ZenOps]

Flamethrower *IS* unlimited ammo :love:

Think about it - every single car has gasoline... 99% of them will be abandoned.

I'd rather have a flamethrower than a shotgun because you will run out of ammo probably in the first day. A flamethrower with chainsaw backup - you would live as long as you can find gasoline, outrun and not get cornered.

Credit goes to Mel Gibson and Mad Max - where a shotgun shell is the rarest thing on the planet, but they still have flamethrowers.

[freshprince1]

My Zombie Plan:

Keep my custom made 3 ft. Philipino Sundang (machete/sword) and Good Ol' Louisville slugger strapped to my MEC Backpack along the sides.

Semi-Auto Benelli 12-gauge. Good at close range and medium range, holds 6 rounds, carbon fibre stock and reloader makes it lightweight and maneuverable, lots of ammo in the MEC backpack.

12" Bass Pro Hunting Knife on one hip.

Find a Magnum, strap to other hip - according to "Nazi Zombies" it's a one-shot kill, great back-up.

Not sure if grenades are worth carrying.

With all this, I'd still be agile enough to move around, and have enough protection to feel comfortable doing so.

Always be wearing full leather to prevent scratches, and BMX helmet for added protection with comfort. Don't forget Ski goggles and ear plugs either, those random dripping corpses above you can get that shit in your eyes/ears, then you're zombified (i.e. 28 days later).

Retreat to the family cabin in Waterton initially - remote, large, on a hill, easier to defend yourself. After the first winter I would start travelling south. With civilisation dead, it makes no sense to remain living in Canada. But then again, the Zombies would probably be easier to kill in the winter. Maybe - like insects - the cold would slow them down a bit. Hmmm, I'll have to think about this now.

[240SX92]

Originally posted by freshprince1
My Zombie Plan:

Keep my custom made 3 ft. Philipino Sundang (machete/sword) and Good Ol' Louisville slugger strapped to my MEC Backpack along the sides.

Semi-Auto Benelli 12-gauge. Good at close range and medium range, holds 6 rounds, carbon fibre stock and reloader makes it lightweight and maneuverable, lots of ammo in the MEC backpack.

12" Bass Pro Hunting Knife on one hip.

Find a Magnum, strap to other hip - according to "Nazi Zombies" it's a one-shot kill, great back-up.

Not sure if grenades are worth carrying.

With all this, I'd still be agile enough to move around, and have enough protection to feel comfortable doing so.

Always be wearing full leather to prevent scratches, and BMX helmet for added protection with comfort. Don't forget Ski goggles and ear plugs either, those random dripping corpses above you can get that shit in your eyes/ears, then you're zombified (i.e. 28 days later).

Retreat to the family cabin in Waterton initially - remote, large, on a hill, easier to defend yourself. After the first winter I would start travelling south. With civilisation dead, it makes no sense to remain living in Canada. But then again, the Zombies would probably be easier to kill in the winter. Maybe - like insects - the cold would slow them down a bit. Hmmm, I'll have to think about this now.

This = win.

I'd probably go to that tea house in lake louise that's a good 3 hour hike but probably has sufficient food, is out in the middle of nowhere, good protection, shelter. Sit on the top floor, take an ax to the stairs so they are unclimbable, voila, impenetrable fortress.

Don't go to walmart/Zellers/Canadian Tire on the initial strike ;) That just spells trouble.

My brother had the idea to make makeshift armor out of hockey equipment... shoulder pads, elbow pads, shin guards, pants, all set! (For halloween we were all Zombie Apocalypse survivors, had a group of about 10, the assault, the captain, mad scientist, nurse, etc etc.) Was great fun!

Last part you talked about reminds me of World War Z when all the southern americans started heading north, and brought nothing but a +5 rated sleeping bag so they all froze along with the zombies, come summer the frozen zombies just thawed and kept going... if you're going north I suggest you head DEEP north where they will never thaw haha.

PS. 28 Days Later weren't zombies they were rage infested disease. :) Could kill them like any normal human being, shot enough, shot to chest, died of bleeding etc etc. And they only ate you because they were angry, usually happened after they beat the piss out of you.

[freshprince1]

Continuing the Zombie theme from this week, check out the trailer for the new movie 'Zombieland" with Woody Harelson, looks pretty funny.

Note the following methods in the trailer of killing Zombies:

- Shotguns
- Uzzi's
- Golf Clubs
- Cadillac Escalade driver's door
- Hummer
- dual chainsaws
- Cotton balls (not so effective)

Enjoy!

ZOMBIELAND (http://www.break.com/movie-trailers/zombieland-trailer---red-band.html)

[Supa Dexta]

While you morons have been busy thinking up useless ways to kill zombies, I've been busy learning their ways, and understanding them.. To the point I can now control vast numbers of them..

[Phil_McGraw]

Originally posted by Supa Dexta
While you morons have been busy thinking up useless ways to kill zombies, I've been busy learning their ways, and understanding them.. To the point I can now control vast numbers of them..

Lmao, so are you going to become the zombie king? A new age empire of zombies? :rofl:

[240SX92]

I don't believe you! Zombies operate on only primal instincts. To eat! The only way you may possibly train them is very tediously rewarding them with human hearts.

:rofl:

[ZenOps]

Zombies don't have brainz, they eat brainz.

Maybe Rob Anders is a Zombie :goflames:

[Tik-Tok]

Originally posted by 240SX92

I'd probably go to that tea house in lake louise

Good thinking, but flawed plan. Too many other people already know about that place, and by the time you managed to get there (assuming you did, because the roads going to the mountains would be CLOGGED with traffic), there would already be some paranoid redneck group up there with the "find your own place, or die where you stand" attitude.

Better spots would be ranger towers in the mountains, that usually required a certain amount of climbing to get to. Most people who know where these are, are also the type to be more friendly (have you ever met a rude person while back-country hiking/climbing?)


Originally posted by 71car2

Would I buy this guide? Naw... after all, zombies are pure fantasy and the movies I've seen are more comedy to me than they were being horror. I had many good guffaws while watching.

If reality is more your style, then check this one out... and give it about 50 years to happen

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/0/09/RobotCover.gif