Wanted: Stuff to piss off my neighbours

[AndyL]

G'day all,

Ok, need a bunch of stuff... To truly send my neighbours over the edge... The big ones at the moment:
I want a empty 55g drum of killex/24d
an old rusty as shit preferably leaky 55g drum that clearly says DDT

Also need someone with a 3/5ton truck with power tailgate to deliver. Bonus points if you can come up with a bio-hazard like suit to wear during delivery. Will pay a reasonable $

Drums will be filled with water - not that the neighbours will know :)

Seeking garden gnomes, and pink flamingos. Uglier/tackier the better. Damaged is acceptable too!

[theken]

U need a rooster weather vane that's bent to shit. Workout bench a 76 el camino shell with no front clip and a stack of temp tires

[AndyL]

Oooooh Oooooh Oooh! You totally reminded me... I gotta start scrounging dumpersters... I need one of those whirly birds with a bad bearing! I could put it right up there with the weathervane :)

[gretz]

I've got a bunch of random car parts - from rads to rims lol...

I also have a comfy chair you can put on your front lawn to enjoy a nice cold one in. This, coupled with a small, old CRT TV and some extension cords to run your fan, TV, and lamp; you're pretty much set. Nothing says classy like....

[Lucky97]

i have a couple of white water barrels if you want them. free of charge.

[Dilmah]

toilet on the front lawn with flowers in it, one morning take the flowers out and sit on it naked while reading the newspaper and wait for them to go to work...

[TomcoPDR]

I got 4 expired condoms.

http://forums.beyond.ca/st/296981/ff-durex-condoms/

Not that I'm suggesting of condoning anything, but if one wants to piss of their neighbours... fill the condoms with water mix corn starch, then toss 'em on their cars, lawn, windows. :dunno: (I'm talking about a hypothetical situation.)

[Dilmah]

The ThinkGeek Annoy-a-tron, place this thing outside their bedroom window, then sit up all night with a few beers and watch the fun...

http://www.thinkgeek.com/gadgets/electronic/8c52/

[Dilmah]

Originally posted by TomcoPDR
I got 4 expired condoms.

http://forums.beyond.ca/st/296981/ff-durex-condoms/

Not that I'm suggesting of condoning anything, but if one wants to piss of their neighbours... fill the condoms with water mix corn starch, then toss 'em on their cars, lawn, windows. :dunno: (I'm talking about a hypothetical situation.)

Never got a chance to use them eh! sory about your luck buddy!

[gretz]

Originally posted by Dilmah


Never got a chance to use them eh! sory about your luck buddy!

:banghead:

who uses condoms lol

[e31]

Wait till they leave and heft a bunch of bird seed onto their roof. They will be having all sorts of freaking creatures on their roof waking them up early.

[whiskas]

GO (http://www.canadiantire.ca/AST/browse/2/OutdoorLiving/GardenDecor/StatuesOrnaments/PRDOVR~0591013P/Decorative%252BGarden%252BGnome.jsp?locale=en)

NUTS (http://www.canadiantire.ca/AST/browse/2/OutdoorLiving/GardenDecor/StatuesOrnaments/PRDOVR~0596497P/Geeky%252BBeek%252BGamer%252BStatue.jsp?locale=en)

[AndyL]

I'm thinking Hundreds of gnomes and flamingos... 10$ each adds up real quick :)

[sheik_yerbouti]

An old air conditioner will do the trick. Have it on the side of the house beside theirs. Make sure you loosen a few bolts there and there and run it during the night on and off. The high pitched sound will drive everyone nuts. You can also point exterior lights in their direction and remove the shields and leave them on all night. These two things together can ruin someone's life given enough time.

[911fever]

I've got a few flamingos I saw in a dumpster nearby by house. I'm kinda far though

[topmade]

If they are home during the day, pick up a rooster from a local farm, they are like $10 or something like that and it'll do it's loud cock-a-doodle-do right at noon.......everyday. It'll be more of a WTF, but annoying none the less. Then when it starts becoming a hassle to keep, do it up KFC style.

[freshprince1]

Play some hockey against the fence late at night until the noise bylaw kicks in at 10 or 11pm.

Whack!!!.....WHACK!!!.....WHACK!!!!

[AndyL]

Found a Killex Drum, Still need a very weathered steel drum (looks like I might just have to stencil DDT on myself - then give it the proper patina).

Hopefully garage sales today will result in many a gnome and flamingo :)


Originally posted by topmade
If they are home during the day, pick up a rooster from a local farm, they are like $10 or something like that and it'll do it's loud cock-a-doodle-do right at noon.......everyday.
Haven't you read the papers... Can't have chickens in calgary... Whatever I do has to pass bylaw's overseeing eye... Unfortunately I have to try not to piss off my nice neighbours - just that pair across the park who seem to be the ones bitching about EVERYTHING...


And why did this get moved outta marketplace? Wouldn't that be the appropriate section since I'm seeking goods/services???

[Dilmah]

Pictures, remember you did nothing without pictures... At the very least let us know when this will all go down so we can take our own pictures.

[nonlinear]

Originally posted by AndyL

Haven't you read the papers... Can't have chickens in calgary... Whatever I do has to pass bylaw's overseeing eye... Unfortunately I have to try not to piss off my nice neighbours - just that pair across the park who seem to be the ones bitching about EVERYTHING...


ACTUALLY, anyone who has been reading the news would know that chickens are now allowed in calgary. so there. :poosie:

[DonJuan]

What did these neighbours do to your exactly to deserve your wrath?

you could post up a link on here to your neighbours facebook or whatever, and have Beyond CSI ruin their life. We need a good reason, like scamming tho; so that epic lulz will ensue.

[masoncgy]

Paint your fence multiple colors... one section bright red, one section sunshine yellow, one section Barney purple, and so on...

[AndyL]

Originally posted by nonlinear


ACTUALLY, anyone who has been reading the news would know that chickens are now allowed in calgary. so there. :poosie:
There's a pilot program allowing the 40 calgarians currently rearing chickens - to continue to do so... There's no current scenario to be added to that list of exempted calgarians...

[codetrap]

Why not head up to spyhill and grab a bunch of garbage there and do some art? I saw a ton of pink flamingo's yesterday, and I'm sure there's stuff there you can do to create some sort of artistic sculpture.

[Buffalo Soldier]

Get a cell phone blocker and hide it by there house. fuck up all their wireless signals. hahaa

[AndyL]

Originally posted by DonJuan
What did these neighbours do to your exactly to deserve your wrath?
http://forums.beyond.ca/st/302264/how-to-deal-with-btchy-neighbors/

Fence is chainlink on that side... Think the city owns it actually... So can't do much with that... Suppose I could create some 4x8 plywood murals and attach it but... meh - dogs like chat with the other dogs in the park; wouldn't want them to be unable to socialize...

It's unfortunately a fine line, I know the eco nutters are one of the complainers... But there's another two-faced SOB in the block, but meanwhile I don't want to royally piss off the rest of the neighbours who don't have a problem with me... Dunno :dunno: Kinda sitting back hoping the CPS Community Liason officer decides to get involved, had a quick chat with him, but he implied he's busy and this wasn't going to be a high priority...

[AndyL]

Originally posted by nonlinear

ACTUALLY, anyone who has been reading the news would know that chickens are now allowed in calgary. so there. :poosie:
I was just thinking about this one... I'm thinking it'd make the econuts happy - that's just not appropriate... It's like local sourced food n stuff...

Wonder if I could get myself a big ol pump jack to setup in the back yard? :angel:

[nonlinear]

i understand how upset you are with all the complaints, but i think you're just going to make things worse by trying to further piss people off. no?

[e31]

My parents don't have a problem with their neighbors, but when they chose the top piece for their garden fountain it was one of those nude statues. I suggested they permanently point the ass end towards the neighbors yard so that's all they see.

[Redwagon]

Open the window closest to your neighbour and crank up the volume while playing midget porn.