Young Girl Assaulted As 8 Youths Look On

[baygirl]

http://www.calgaryherald.com/Police+seize+cellphones+interview+drunk+teens+after+schoolyard+assault/3487713/story.html

A girl as young as 12 yrs old was assaulted in NE Calgary playground as 8 youths watched and took pictures.

WTF is wrong with people today?

[iCreep]

meh...its the NE. Who gets drunk during the day when they were that young?

[Tomaz]

My blood boiled this morning when I heard this on the radio. fucking sick.

[kvg]

And people in the area witnessed this and only one eventually called the police.:banghead: :guns:

[jazzyb]

fucking disgusting man, i'm no e-thug but i would have ran out to help the lil baby.

[SCHIDER23]

poor kid, man I can't believe nobody called for help
"He was on top of that girl for more than 12 minutes. I was thinking maybe they were friends and were joking, but then they started taking pictures."....WOW 12 minutes before she realized what was happening. :banghead:

[EK 2.0]

That's...wow...I can't even imagine or begin to fathom what was going through the minds of people watching...

[jazzyb]

NE

[n1zm0]

it was an off-duty teacher (w/e that means) who was nearby that called it in, all these kids are under 18 right ? so does that probably mean with our justice system that a whole bunch of slaps on the wrists are about to happen? ffs

its hard to say what the witness saw but usually when theres a circle of ppl in that age group with commotion happening in the middle its probably not ring-around-the-rosy, its usually something bad i.e fight, where the fk did this lady goto school to not understand wtf was going on

[kvg]

From what I've heard they are all jr. high kids:banghead:

[BerserkerCatSplat]

Originally posted by kvg
From what I've heard they are all jr. high kids:banghead:

...which means their punishment will likely just be a stern talking-to.

[revelations]

It was a bunch of drunk JR high people watching - dont think youd get too much of a helpful response from them - even sober.

[Kloubek]

I would SO be in jail if I witnessed this.

[Phenix]

Originally posted by Kloubek
I would SO be in jail if I witnessed this.

me too

[speedog]

NE has nothing to do with this as this can happen any where in Calgary - it's just what some kids consider fun these days.

[SilverGS]

Originally posted by speedog
NE has nothing to do with this as this can happen any where in Calgary - it's just what some kids consider fun these days.

Then I weep for this coming generation. It was already bad when these kids are bored out of their skull so they start vandalizing, stealing, throwing eggs at cars, pushing crap off bridges at cars. Now it's
"You know what would be fun?"
"Let's rape some girl and stand around and take pictures and video. That would be so much fun!"

Sick.

[chkolny541]

Originally posted by speedog
NE has nothing to do with this as this can happen any where in Calgary - it's just what some kids consider fun these days.

no..no it cant

[GoChris]

:facepalm:

[revelations]

Originally posted by speedog
NE has nothing to do with this as this can happen any where in Calgary - it's just what some kids consider fun these days.

:werd:

[CUG]

Great community, good people.


People forget there was a giant beat-down in westhills that had some dudes brain leaking out of his mouth.

[speedog]

Recent Calgary youth violence...

Southwest (http://www.calgaryherald.com/news/assault+convictions+swarming+beating+Calgary+teen/3153889/story.html)

Southeast (http://www.cbc.ca/canada/calgary/story/2009/03/25/cgy-pickaxe-murder-calgary-sentence.html?ref=rss)

Northwest (http://cnews.canoe.ca/CNEWS/Crime/2008/05/08/5504326-sun.html)

Downtown (http://www.cbc.ca/canada/calgary/story/2010/09/02/calgary-skatepark-youth-stabbing-assault.html)

Okotoks (http://www.canada.com/calgaryherald/news/story.html?id=3609f335-e630-4e3c-8de3-f704d9f2a1d0)

Chestermere (http://www.patrickfagan.com/index.php?page=cases/indcase.php&catid=3&indid=37)

We know families who have kids going to every level of school in every quadrant of Calgary and youth violence exists everywhere, much of which never makes it on the news or that the police aren't even aware of. Parents need to educate their kids and not insulate them from today's realities, make their kids aware that shit is happening and how their kids should react if all of sudden they find themselves in a less than desirable situation.

[Benny]

Junior high kids getting drunk and sexually assaulting a 12 year old...

This world just seems to get stranger and stranger.

I know hindsight is always 20/20, but I still can't understand how a mother could sit watching for 12 fucking minutes while a little kid is getting raped. Not trying to sound like a tough guy, but I'd be happy to send a few of the suspect's teeth through the back of his head. Shit like this both confuses and enrages me.

[FraserB]

I think if any reasonable person witnessed this they would be up on charges, doubtful you could get a jury to convict though.

Honestly the parents of these kids are as much to blame as the kids are, you dont get to this point in your life without fuckups as parents. They also need to start publishing names, the Youth Criminal Justice Act is a joke and doles out zero punishment and never affects the youth later in life. Publish their names and give them a real sentence and maybe people will change their ways.

[Toma]

Its human nature.... the classic example of "bystander effect" was the murder of a New York woman in 1964.

Kitty Genovese was brutally assaulted and murdered in an attack that lasted upwards of half an hour by some reports. Many witnessed and heard her screams, no one helped her, and the first call to the police was recorded as 15 or more minutes into the attack.

Her name is in almost every psychology and sociology book, but they don't teach the important stuff to everyone.

[Kloubek]

Originally posted by Benny
Junior high kids getting drunk and sexually assaulting a 12 year old...

This world just seems to get stranger and stranger.

I know hindsight is always 20/20, but I still can't understand how a mother could sit watching for 12 fucking minutes while a little kid is getting raped. Not trying to sound like a tough guy, but I'd be happy to send a few of the suspect's teeth through the back of his head. Shit like this both confuses and enrages me.

According to the article, the woman did not realize what was actually going on until she went to the upstairs window and heard the girl's screams.

[speedog]

The type of environment kid's grow up in at home will definitely have an affect on most kid's lot in life as they grow up. As an example, we have one 12-13 year old boy who's been kicked out of our store for possible theft and he's also not welcome in the neighbouring Blockbuster and 7/11 shops in Bridlewood. Add to this that the Bridlewood Sobey's has asked him to remove everything from his pockets while in the company of his Dad and you got to wonder what's going on. Finally, what 12-13 year old kid is hanging around a shopping complex parking lot at 7:30AM on a weekday during the summer holidays instead of being at home in bed sleeping in. Fully expect to read about this kid in the news at some point in the future as he's well known amongst the local shop owners and also in the community and not in a good way.

[300zxfairlday]

updates

http://www.calgaryherald.com/news/Girl+website+before+having+schoolyard+Police/3490575/story.html

[Tomaz]

Originally posted by 300zxfairlday
updates


I am getting more confused and more upset as this unfolds.

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!?!?!

[revelations]

Originally posted by Tomaz


I am getting more confused and more upset as this unfolds.

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?!?!?!

sounds like a FB sex hookup gone wrong...

[Mibz]

Originally posted by revelations


sounds like a FB sex hookup gone wrong... Or right :P

[speedog]

Originally posted by revelations
sounds like a FB sex hookup gone wrong... Yupp, 12 year old girl all of a sudden found herself in a situation that she emotionally and mentally was not prepared for yet. And again, you have to wonder where the parents are in all of this, what type of family dynamics are or are not at play here.

[b_t]

a group of friends ranging in age from 12 to 16?
who the fuck hangs out with 12 year olds when they are 16?

[Mibz]

Originally posted by b_t
who the fuck hangs out with 12 year olds when they are 16? http://members.shaw.ca/mibz/culdesac.png

[iCreep]

Originally posted by b_t
a group of friends ranging in age from 12 to 16?
who the fuck hangs out with 12 year olds when they are 16?

no kidding, when you're 16 you have that mind set of wanting to hang out with either ppl your age or older to be cooler. lol, hanging out with 12 yr olds ehh...definitely would get bashed for that somehow.

LOL to rage's picture.

[Tik-Tok]

Originally posted by iCreep


no kidding, when you're 16 you have that mind set of wanting to hang out with either ppl your age or older to be cooler. lol, hanging out with 12 yr olds ehh...definitely would get bashed for that somehow.



Well according to 1/2 the internet, jailbait is cool and funny.

[ZenOps]

Reminds me of my youth...

Girls used to play double dare all the time on me. Ahh the memories, to be 13 again :poosie:

[Tik-Tok]

I'm also curious what the 100% truth is here.

-The police call it assault, consensual or not, because the age difference is >2 years
-The witness called the police after she heard "screams"

Is it possible that the 12 year old was fully consensual the whole time, and the screams were not the screams of someone being attacked, and that's why the other teens didn't stop it?

[CUG]

Originally posted by revelations


sounds like a FB sex hookup gone wrong... :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

I did that with a couple of big'ns. They were all older than me though, and I was the one screaming for help.

[n1zm0]

Originally posted by Tik-Tok
Is it possible that the 12 year old was fully consensual the whole time, and the screams were not the screams of someone being attacked, and that's why the other teens didn't stop it?

how much of a ghetto skank would one have to be to possibly lose their virginity in a school field, surrounded by 10 other kids, at 4:30pm on a holiday monday... at 12 years old??

its sounding like a botched FB sex meet as said but who knows, supposedly charges were being made so something doesnt make sense

[Tik-Tok]

Originally posted by n1zm0


how much of a ghetto skank would one have to be to possibly lose their virginity in a school field, surrounded by 10 other kids, at 4:30pm on a holiday monday... at 12 years old??

its sounding like a botched FB sex meet as said but who knows, supposedly charges were being made so something doesnt make sense

From another article, charges are being made, regardless of how consensual it was, because the age diff. is great than 2 years. Who knows if this was the girls first time, if she's getting drunk at supper time in a school field, she's probably not that innocent.

[ZenOps]

Boys are sometimes weaker than the girls until 10 to 14 or so.

In a wrestling match at around that age, the girl usually ends up on top.

[JfuckinC]

Why is the person on a gurny(sp?) laying face down going into the amberlamps? that looks to be the older boy too judging by shoe style/size... wtf lol

[ZenOps]

I think you are right.

Whoever is on the stretcher seems to be face down. Which is unusual, unless there is some physical reason that is preventing face up.

[FraserB]

You do realize that a 12 year old can't give consent, right?

[ZenOps]

12 year old boy or girl can't give consent.

But it still happens, especially when they are probably drunk to the point of passing out and pre-arrange the meeting.

If you have to ask the question "Did we just have sex?" after waking up, then you've probably had too much to drink, snort, or smoke.

[Xtrema]

Originally posted by FraserB
You do realize that a 12 year old can't give consent, right?

You know @ 16, legal ramification of the act hasn't sung in yet. This is the basis of the Young Offenders Act. On top, internet and all the media outlet promoting sex and drugs, this will happen more.

While I'm disgusted, I'm not surprised. Anyone seen the urban kids portraited in Kids? Calgary is finally having problems that major urban centers had seen for decades. It just seem to spread faster with internet.

Underfunded education system doesn't help. Teachers' hands are tied by the budget and parents who think they are always right - yet leave the teacher do the child raising.

Nobody fears the teacher and most kids don't have authority figures in their lives any more which is traditionally parents' role. Direct result of pussification of generations.

[DonJuan]

Originally posted by Tik-Tok

Well according to 1/2 the internet, jailbait is cool and funny.

Thats cuz it is funny. Just like racist and sexist jokes. Its when people are retarded enough to believe and act on these that makes them a liability to society.

[revelations]

Originally posted by CUG
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
I did that with a couple of big'ns. They were all older than me though, and I was the one screaming for help.

What is it with fat chicks and being ultra horny? :poosie:

[ZEDGE]

Seriously with the NE shit..Could happen anywhere.

:facepalm:

Sad none the less.

[TomcoPDR]

Originally posted by ZEDGE
Seriously with the NE shit..Could happen anywhere.

:facepalm:

Sad none the less.

Could had been a pre-arrange marriage hook up. (only making this JOKE after reading 2nd article how the 2 hooked up on the internet, and not some random "attack")

[TYMSMNY]

Originally posted by ZenOps
12 year old boy or girl can't give consent.

But it still happens, especially when they are probably drunk to the point of passing out and pre-arrange the meeting.

If you have to ask the question "Did we just have sex?" after waking up, then you've probably had too much to drink, snort, or smoke.

I believe they can and only to someone that's within 2 years of their age.

Nonetheless, this is absolutely horrible as other kids were even WATCHING. Every one of them needs a lesson in civility and respect.

[n0xid]

Originally posted by TYMSMNY
Nonetheless, this is absolutely horrible as other kids were even WATCHING. Every one of them needs a lesson in civility and respect.

"man this is so going on youtube! ...brah"

[old&slow]

Originally posted by TomcoPDR


Could had been a pre-arrange marriage hook up. (only making this JOKE after reading 2nd article how the 2 hooked up on the internet, and not some random "attack")

I wonder if it would still be a joke if it were your sister or your daughter?

[iCreep]

http://www.calgaryherald.com/technology/Schoolyard+Mixed+ethics+bystander+effect+YouTube+generation/3493036/story.html

anyone read todays article on the incident?

They say there may be pending charges on the people who wtinessed it but didn't do anything about it.

[speedog]

From iCreep's linked article...

"People need to have good fundamental values, and pass those on to their kids," says Tom Keenan, a professor in the University of Calgary's faculty of environmental design and a technology expert.

And that there is the problem, folks - good fundamental values have pretty much disappeared in many family units.

[you&me]

Originally posted by iCreep
http://www.calgaryherald.com/technology/Schoolyard+Mixed+ethics+bystander+effect+YouTube+generation/3493036/story.html

anyone read todays article on the incident?

They say there may be pending charges on the people who wtinessed it but didn't do anything about it.

Charges laid for inaction is a slippery slope.

[sillysod]

Well parents should be held accountable. WTF is a 12 yr old girl doing getting wasted and banged in a park? My parents would smash the shit out of me if I pulled anything like that.

[speedog]

Originally posted by you&me
Charges laid for inaction is a slippery slope. Calgary Police Services recently laid a hate crime charge in the city, so who's to say charges for inaction can't happen. Would be kind of cool to see it stick and the fall-out afterwards.

[n1zm0]

Originally posted by sillysod
WTF is a 12 yr old girl doing getting wasted and banged in a park? My parents would smash the shit out of me if I pulled anything like that.

getting banged by some guy or drinking? :D j/k

[sillysod]

Originally posted by n1zm0


getting banged by some guy or drinking? :D j/k

both :rofl:

[TomcoPDR]

Originally posted by old&slow


I wonder if it would still be a joke if it were your sister or your daughter?

She wasn't assaulted, she decided to meet a boy through the interwebs. Read below quote.



Originally posted by sillysod
Well parents should be held accountable. WTF is a 12 yr old girl doing getting wasted and banged in a park? My parents would smash the shit out of me if I pulled anything like that.

[dirtsniffer]

Originally posted by ZenOps
Boys are sometimes weaker than the girls until 10 to 14 or so.

In a wrestling match at around that age, the girl usually ends up on top.

lol, did you get bullied by some girls back in the day?
your posts finally make a little sense to me now

[4lti]

Dont all the Jr High kids now look like there still in elementary now?
If this girls 12 shes probably really damn young looking.
All the kids I see around now are way to small for there ages.
Them having sex already is... Somethin.. Fucked...

If this girls agreeing to sex at 12.
Shit, I dont wanna know what shes gonna be doing when shes 18.

:rofl: :rofl:

[old&slow]

Originally posted by TomcoPDR


She wasn't assaulted, she decided to meet a boy through the interwebs. Read below quote.




Point is she made a mistake. She'll regret it and I'm sure she already has. Yet you decide to poke fun.
Folks should consider before they past judgment how this would feel if it were closer to home. I know many people who have done regrettable things. Myself included.
As for her parents...maybe she only has one. If she's lucky.

[FraserB]

Originally posted by you&me


Charges laid for inaction is a slippery slope.

There are already laws like this in place in Canada, not too sure about Alberta or if they have been used, but they do exist.

With all the comments that are saying its not that bad, I guarantee if it was your daughter, you would be screaming for blood and she would not have done anything wrong in the situation.

[Sugarphreak]

...

[403Gemini]

Originally posted by iCreep
http://www.calgaryherald.com/technology/Schoolyard+Mixed+ethics+bystander+effect+YouTube+generation/3493036/story.html

anyone read todays article on the incident?

They say there may be pending charges on the people who wtinessed it but didn't do anything about it.

Very well written article IMO.

I think a lot of it has to do with inactive parents in their childrens lives and less about video games and the internet.

I looked at some pretty fucked up shit when I was in high school (remember when stileproject.com was more than just a 3rd rate porn website and more like documenting reality/porn ?) , but my parents played an active role in my life and even playing games as a kid my dad would play them with me to what I believe now, make sure it was nothing inappropriate.

Kids these days are being subjected to a lot more and imo the parents have to try harder now more than ever to make sure their kids aren't being subjected to a bunch of the shit out there.

Honestly, if I had kids, there would be dozens of video games I wouldn't let them play until they were in their mid/later teens. No way in hell I would ever let a kid younger than 14-15 play grand theft auto or games like that.

Also I think the stats are something like 50% of kids have lost their virginity by the time they hit 14 now... (again that's off the top of my head, perhaps its not that high, but it's much higher than it was when I was in jr high 15 years ago) so parents also have to educate their kids on sex. A lot of parents seem to take a back seat and hope the school board teaches their kids this stuff, and the school board (from what ive heard/sounds like) has really skipped over a lot of the details from when I was a kid.

Oh well, that's my daily rant, just a tougher world for both kids and parents a like. Seems like kids between 12-19 right now almost feel like a lost cause. NOT ALL, but a lot don't have the same moral compass most of us grew up with, and hopefully people hovering around my age that are now having kids are learning from all of this and will become good parents.

[codetrap]

I'm agreeing that it's more about crappy parenting. The debate on Jack yesterday about how and if you could lowjack your kids' cell phone highlighted that. I would and will do it in a heartbeat. I want to know what my kid is doing on the internets, txts etc, and I want to know where she is at all times. It took me exactly 1 google search to find a dozen companies that are doing exactly that, and will send you updates every 2 hours to your smartphone or email as to where/what your kid is doing.

Personally, I think this is a killer tool for building trust. You'll know instantly if the kid is lying to you, and if you've done your job right, you'll never have to confront them with the truth.

Then today, coming up in the elevator, a lady was talking to her coworker about how she had the huge drama with her 11 year old daughter last night because the lady said "no way" to a coed sleepover. COED sleepover at 11 years old. Seriously, what parent in their right mind thinks that a coed sleepover at 11 years old is acceptable? Or that there isn't going to be a little hanky panky going on? REALLY? I totally applauded her decision, and told her so. Then of course being me, made the comment, "what, are the parents planning on handing out condoms & wine with the pop & chips?"

[ZenOps]

I would definitely say that its about 50% loss of innocence by the time they hit 14 or 15. California is even earlier.

Dry humping used to be the thing back in my day. The girls didn't always want to go all the way but rubbing was fine. Always let the girl be on top though, it was an unwritten rule.

Button fly jeans, now that was an invention.

Nowadays us old geezers would have to go to a lapdance parlour to remind us of the younger years.

I'll say it again, damn I wish I was 13 again.

[403Gemini]

Originally posted by codetrap
I'm agreeing that it's more about crappy parenting. The debate on Jack yesterday about how and if you could lowjack your kids' cell phone highlighted that. I would and will do it in a heartbeat. I want to know what my kid is doing on the internets, txts etc, and I want to know where she is at all times. It took me exactly 1 google search to find a dozen companies that are doing exactly that, and will send you updates every 2 hours to your smartphone or email as to where/what your kid is doing.

Personally, I think this is a killer tool for building trust. You'll know instantly if the kid is lying to you, and if you've done your job right, you'll never have to confront them with the truth.

Then today, coming up in the elevator, a lady was talking to her coworker about how she had the huge drama with her 11 year old daughter last night because the lady said "no way" to a coed sleepover. COED sleepover at 11 years old. Seriously, what parent in their right mind thinks that a coed sleepover at 11 years old is acceptable? Or that there isn't going to be a little hanky panky going on? REALLY? I totally applauded her decision, and told her so. Then of course being me, made the comment, "what, are the parents planning on handing out condoms & wine with the pop & chips?"

Terrifying that a parent would allow their kid to throw a co-ed sleepover... jesus if my kid asked me that @ 11 I would seriously question the kids they hang out with!

I know for a fact my parents probably listened into a few min of a few telephone convo's when I was younger... sure I effing hated it but I get it now.

Also when I was in high school and used to smoke pot (not often at all really, maybe 7-8 times total so I never stunk like it to make my parents suspect me) i unscrewed my pipe into its 4 pieces and put it in various places around the room so it really wouldn't look like anything. Like one i tossed in with my change, another with my keys, another oh my desk next to my pens/pencils, and the other piece I hid under my bed. My folks found all the pieces and put them all together :rofl: and justified it that my mom was "cleaning my room" (my room wasnt clean! LYING SNOOPS! haha) but man they busted me. Truthfully they didn't even yell at me, and instead talked to me about drugs and how pot CAN lead to harder stuff and they just wanted to make sure I wouldn't be pushed into anything crazy like meth or coke.

[Tik-Tok]

Originally posted by codetrap
The debate on Jack yesterday about how and if you could lowjack your kids' cell phone highlighted that. I would and will do it in a heartbeat.

Personally, I think this is a killer tool for building trust. You'll know instantly if the kid is lying to you, and if you've done your job right, you'll never have to confront them with the truth.




Seriously? This is sig worthy shit right here.

[n1zm0]

Originally posted by 403Gemini
Terrifying that a parent would allow their kid to throw a co-ed sleepover... jesus if my kid asked me that @ 11 I would seriously question the kids they hang out with!


yeah @ 11 ys/o is WTF, media has subconsciously brain washed these recent generations of kids in the last 10ish years to the point that to them, its really ok to be a whoorish promiscuous slut/tease under 15ys/o really starting with the kids who were 10ys/o at the Britney Spears - oops i did it again/one more time era and linearly increased this slutiness steadily for every year until now imo, wtf happened to cooties!? isn't that around the age when kids used to do that?

[codetrap]

Originally posted by Tik-Tok

Seriously? This is sig worthy shit right here.

I'm not quite sure how to take that. My thought on it is this. I'm going to give my kids the benefit of the doubt, but I'm going to have the ace in the hole of having a tool to know what's going on. I will check up on their stories once in awhile just to make sure, but all in all, I'll KNOW for certain that they're telling the truth to me, on average at least, and I'll be able to trust them more and more. If it turns out I can't trust them, then we'll work on that particular issue as required. Personally, I'd rather find out they're lying to me by checking a lowjacked cellphone, vs finding out when the police come knocking at my door over something much much worse.

How is that not a tool for building trust? They never need know that Mom & Dad can monitor them if we choose. If we've done our jobs right, we'll never ever have to reveal that yes, we really did know all along, and we let it slide anyways, or not.

Is this a bad thing?

[baygirl]

My daughter is 5, and I just can't imagine her being ready to have sex when she's 12. At that age I imagine her still thinking boys are gross. At least I hope she does.

As for computer use, I plan on keeping the computer in the family room, not her bedroom, and she's going to know that I monitor everything. Is part of her going to think I'm too strict-probably. Do I care-nope. Half the problems with kids these days is that parents want to be their kids friend, and seem almost afraid to upset them.

[Xtrema]

Originally posted by n1zm0


yeah @ 11 ys/o is WTF, media has subconsciously brain washed these recent generations of kids in the last 10ish years to the point that to them, its really ok to be a whoorish promiscuous slut/tease under 15ys/o really starting with the kids who were 10ys/o at the Britney Spears - oops i did it again/one more time era and linearly increased this slutiness steadily for every year until now imo, wtf happened to cooties!? isn't that around the age when kids used to do that?

Here's the problem. Just look at this trend:

http://www.terry.ubc.ca/wp-content/uploads/dora-the-explorer.jpg

http://static.neatorama.com/images/2008-06/strawberry-shortcake-redesigned.jpg

And you are wondering why girls are being raised as sluts.

[Tik-Tok]

Originally posted by codetrap


I'm not quite sure how to take that.

...

Is this a bad thing?

I know where you are coming from, and will be very tempted when my (future) children get into their teens to do the same thing,

BUT

Trust is a two way street. If your child ever finds out you're literally spying on them 24/7, they WILL freak, and will take a long time to trust YOU again.

[codetrap]

Tik Tok, I can totally see where you're coming from too, and I agree that trust is a two way street. But, ultimately, I have to be the parent. Part of my job is to protect my daughter from herself. The last thing in the world I want is to come across a jailbait photo of her on beyond because she thought it would be cute to send half nekkid pics of herself to her friends.

Since she's only 2, I have plenty of time to refine or change my mind about this. You call it the definition of irony that I would use a tool that allows me to spy on my child to build trust, and tell me that they will freak. Well, I think you're making some false assumptions. First may be that the child is an equal partner in the family. She's not. She'll have to earn that over time. Another is that she's going to be responsible right off the bat, or able to make smart decisions all the time. Right now as she's 2, she can't. She makes bad decisions all the time. Most of them thankfully are the order of trying to ride the dog, which usually involves a crash to the floor, and nothing worse.

You're also assuming that I won't simply tell her outright when she get's her first phone. "Be aware. Everything you do on this phone is monitored. We love you, and we trust you, but we will do what we have to in order to protect you, even from yourself." I also think you're envisioning this as a control mechanism. It could be, but used intelligently it won't be. I plan on letting her make her own mistakes. I already do. I'll stand by and let her do something that will cause her no lasting harm, but teach her valuable lessons. I'll also intervene in a heartbeat if she's going to do something where she can really harm herself.

However. I promise you'll never read about my daughter being a 12 year meeting up for a casual sex hookup and getting assaulted because am going to be involved. That means NO unmonitored access to technology until she's old enough to fend for herself and shown that she can make good decisions. When that point happens, I'll happily cancel any *low-jacking* because I'll know beyond a shadow of a doubt she'll be a responsible young woman with a good head on her shoulders with a proven track record.

If that causes her to freak, well, too bad. She'll get over it.

[Xtrema]

Originally posted by Tik-Tok


I know where you are coming from, and will be very tempted when my (future) children get into their teens to do the same thing,

BUT

Trust is a two way street. If your child ever finds out you're literally spying on them 24/7, they WILL freak, and will take a long time to trust YOU again.

I won't trust my kids because shit I as a kid pulled on my parents and tons of stuff that they didn't know. Most of those shit would have got me killed or huge trouble in today's society.

[G-ZUS]

Originally posted by codetrap
Tik Tok, I can totally see where you're coming from too, and I agree that trust is a two way street. But, ultimately, I have to be the parent. Part of my job is to protect my daughter from herself. The last thing in the world I want is to come across a jailbait photo of her on beyond because she thought it would be cute to send half nekkid pics of herself to her friends.

Since she's only 2, I have plenty of time to refine or change my mind about this. You call it the definition of irony that I would use a tool that allows me to spy on my child to build trust, and tell me that they will freak. Well, I think you're making some false assumptions. First may be that the child is an equal partner in the family. She's not. She'll have to earn that over time. Another is that she's going to be responsible right off the bat, or able to make smart decisions all the time. Right now as she's 2, she can't. She makes bad decisions all the time. Most of them thankfully are the order of trying to ride the dog, which usually involves a crash to the floor, and nothing worse.

You're also assuming that I won't simply tell her outright when she get's her first phone. "Be aware. Everything you do on this phone is monitored. We love you, and we trust you, but we will do what we have to in order to protect you, even from yourself." I also think you're envisioning this as a control mechanism. It could be, but used intelligently it won't be. I plan on letting her make her own mistakes. I already do. I'll stand by and let her do something that will cause her no lasting harm, but teach her valuable lessons. I'll also intervene in a heartbeat if she's going to do something where she can really harm herself.

However. I promise you'll never read about my daughter being a 12 year meeting up for a casual sex hookup and getting assaulted because am going to be involved. That means NO unmonitored access to technology until she's old enough to fend for herself and shown that she can make good decisions. When that point happens, I'll happily cancel any *low-jacking* because I'll know beyond a shadow of a doubt she'll be a responsible young woman with a good head on her shoulders with a proven track record.

If that causes her to freak, well, too bad. She'll get over it.

:werd: to big bird

[kvg]

I have a two daughters 7 and 9 years old and this shit freaks me out!!!
My wife and I have already had all kinds "talks" with them about the internet.:(

[403Gemini]

Originally posted by Tik-Tok


Trust is a two way street. If your child ever finds out you're literally spying on them 24/7, they WILL freak, and will take a long time to trust YOU again.

I dunno, it's true they'll be hurt or angry, but lets face it, havent you growing up forgot to clear your history on the internet or wipe the cookies and got caught looking at porn? ;) Sure I felt like my parents were spying, I mean who goes into the history / cookie folders? But really, thinking about it, I was the one who was in the wrong, and they were just looking out for me. If it takes my kid a few years to realize that i was being a PARENT, and not a friend, fair enough.

It's a much different world now than what we grew up in.

[EK 2.0]

Originally posted by 403Gemini

I dunno, it's true they'll be hurt or angry, but lets face it, havent you growing up forgot to clear your history on the internet or wipe the cookies and got caught looking at porn? ;) Sure I felt like my parents were spying, I mean who goes into the history / cookie folders? But really, thinking about it, I was the one who was in the wrong, and they were just looking out for me. If it takes my kid a few years to realize that i was being a PARENT, and not a friend, fair enough.

It's a much different world now than what we grew up in.


Holy fuck I'm old...we didn't have internet growing up hahaha...

[gam0s]

i had internet growing up.. good ol asianavenue and calgaryplanet haha.. wasnt even that great lol

[Tik-Tok]

Originally posted by 403Gemini


I dunno, it's true they'll be hurt or angry, but lets face it, havent you growing up forgot to clear your history on the internet or wipe the cookies and got caught looking at porn?


Originally posted by EK 2.0

Holy fuck I'm old...we didn't have internet growing up hahaha...

I had 14.4K modem, and BBS sites for porn... 5 mintues per photo :rofl:


Originally posted by codetrap

You're also assuming that I won't simply tell her outright when she get's her first phone. "Be aware. Everything you do on this phone is monitored. We love you, and we trust you, but we will do what we have to in order to protect you, even from yourself."

If that causes her to freak, well, too bad. She'll get over it.

Well you did say "without her ever having to know the truth" which indicates you would spy without informing her, and by "freak out", I didn't mean have a temper tantrum and not talk to you for a week until she wants to use the car again, what I meant was more the "catholic school girl" syndrome, where she may suddenly feel like she can't be herself, bottle it all up, then EXPLODE when she's out of the house.

[adam c]

I took my dad's magazines, didn't have a computer or internet to look porn up online until i was half way through Jr. High

The benefit of being in IT is I got to learn how to secure networks and basically spy on whatever i want, when my daughter grows up you can sure bet there will be traffic tracking on the network and a in car GPS tracking system

[403Gemini]

Originally posted by Tik-Tok




I had 14.4K modem, and BBS sites for porn... 5 mintues per photo :rofl:



Dont worry I'm not a spoiled brat like a lot of kids today, I had a 28.8K ;)

I learned how the internet and computers worked growing up... too many kids take high speed for granted!

[codetrap]

Originally posted by Tik-Tok


I had 14.4K modem, and BBS sites for porn... 5 mintues per photo :rofl:

Well you did say "without her ever having to know the truth" which indicates you would spy without informing her, and by "freak out", I didn't mean have a temper tantrum and not talk to you for a week until she wants to use the car again, what I meant was more the "catholic school girl" syndrome, where she may suddenly feel like she can't be herself, bottle it all up, then EXPLODE when she's out of the house.

Yeah.. Crazy eh? I didn't get high speed until I moved to calgary in 97. Before that was 33.6.

I'm still up in the air as to how much we'll tell her to be honest. It's still a few years away, and we'll see how she develops as she grows up. With any luck, she'll be a lesbian and I won't have to worry so much.

Like my dad said "If you have a boy, you'll only have to worry about one little prick. If you have a girl, you have to worry about them all!"

[JfuckinC]

Originally posted by gam0s
i had internet growing up.. good ol asianavenue and calgaryplanet haha.. wasnt even that great lol

haha CP/ICQ is where it all began.... Then Enternexus-->nexopia/Msn Messenger w/ webcams.. Thats where it all ended.. Kids are fucking disgusting now, they arent even kids..

[speedog]

Tie their hands, watch everything they do, monitor where they go and then they graduate, turn 18 and wham, tossed into an adult's world with no skills or tools on how to deal with life. We have 3 kids, daughter almost 12 in grade 7 and 2 boys (16 in grade 11 and 18 in first year UofC) - never ever put any monitoring devices or software in place. Instead and right from a young age, we discussed things with them in terms they could understand for their maturity and comprehension level at that point in time. There was never any baby talking to them in our household and anyone that did baby talk to them was asked not to.

When they asked about things, we explained it to them in a context they were able to understand for their age and no issue was left untouched be it sex/sexuality, religion, politics, relationships or the day's news. No monitoring or blocking software/hardware was ever put on the computers, but all computers were kept in public areas in the house. Interestingly enough, my sister-in-law's family shielded their two girls from everything - the kids learned about sex/sexuality from a book, not from discussions with their parents. Drugs/alcohol and what it was all about - never discussed in that household but yet in ours, it was openly discussed and before they were 18 , they were allowed to drink with Mom and Dad, better to understand what it was all about then going on a sleepover or whatever and getting in way over their heads. Sister-in-law now has one girl who at not even 16 has already spent several months in a lock-down rehab facility because of cocaine/speed addictions which we suspect included selling her body to pay for the habit and the younger daughter, well there's more trouble probably a brewing.

In the end, there's really two ways you can go about this - put the blinders on your kids (and yourselves) and let them discover this big world fully unprepared or educate them through honest and open discussions where the parents and and kids treat each other as equals and develop a relationship based upon trust, loyalty and respect. The latter seems to be working quite well for us up to this point in time and the former proved to be an utter failure for my sister-in-law.

[frizzlefry]

When I was growing up, I decided one day to get a Mohawk. Started listening to black flag, the sex pistols and the Misfits. Parents, let your children....hell encourage your children...to become punks if they are not drawn to drama or math club. There were some troubled kids in my group of friends for sure. Some were arrested at "Food not bombs" protests. Some like to spray paint anarchy logos on stuff. Back then, those were bad kids. But at least the music we listened to was political and did not glorify sex and money. It’s not the internet. It’s that Jersey Shore bullshit. As lame as it sounds, it’s a lot of rap music too. My wife likes Eminem. Great production and he has talent but the way he talks about his ex and women....hell, no 12 year old should listen to that. If I had a daughter, I would much rather her listen to music that said "screw the government" rather than "get on your back and screw". I bet if the girl from this new story came home and her mom saw a Mohawk on her, mom would lose her mind. But those nice clean cut kids on Jersey Shore are fine right? Used to be that punks were called trash. These days, trash drives a Mercedes and hides in plain sight.

[jaylees]

Who are we to say what is normal Who are we to judge about what age should be the consensual sex age Who are we to judge who was sex infront of others or where. Sometimes it is us who needs to look in the mirrors more often. That is all I am saying.

[revelations]

Originally posted by jaylees
Who are we to say what is normal Who are we to judge about what age should be the consensual sex age Who are we to judge who was sex infront of others or where. Sometimes it is us who needs to look in the mirrors more often. That is all I am saying.

Are your serious in thinking that your typical 12 year old will make sound choices regarding safe sex and promiscuity?

Our laws exist partly because of stupid people who lack common sense.

If common sense existed throughout our culture, we could do away with many of our laws.... otherwise.... we need them to keep 12 year olds from turning into single moms.

[codetrap]

Originally posted by speedog
Tie their hands, watch everything they do, monitor where they go and then they graduate, turn 18 and wham, tossed into an adult's world with no skills or tools on how to deal with life. ~snip~ sister-in-law.


You have your way of raising your kids, and that's great. I actually agree with you about the open and honest communication. However, I never ever said I would FILTER out the real world. I said I would monitor her interactions with it. She's going to be able to handle herself, I just want to monitor her progress, and be able to intervene immediately if she gets in over her head, before it comes down to a police visit.

[Kritafo]

The boy has been been officially charged with assault.

http://www.660news.com/news/local/article/100047--16-year-old-boy-charged-with-sex-assault-of-pre-teen

[jesusmoraldo]

Originally posted by Kritafo
The boy has been been officially charged with assault.

http://www.660news.com/news/local/article/100047--16-year-old-boy-charged-with-sex-assault-of-pre-teen

:thumbsdow That's prejudice.

[RickDaTuner]

Originally posted by jesusmoraldo


:thumbsdow That's prejudice.

O'Rly?

[CUG]

Originally posted by jesusmoraldo


:thumbsdow That's prejudice. OOGA BOOGA WHERE DA WHITE BITCHES AT.

Sorry, why is that prejudicial?

[gerrycurl21]

Geez, thankfully the kids a stupid enough to do this at 430pm at a public place. Imagine if they brought her to a discrete place, how many times this woulda happened.

[Tik-Tok]

Nice how the media just shut their traps after it turns out it was just two kids having sex. The guys still being charged (as it is a crime), but the girl was 100% willing participant.

I'm glad my first time wasn't reported to the cops. I was 12, she was 15, alcohol involved, and also in a school field (though definitely NOT in front of other people)


The story was this, Staff Sgt. Barber clarified: The girl had met the boy online and arranged to meet him at the schoolyard. She brought her friends, and he brought his. The two had been drinking. They had sex.

After interviewing the witnesses, including the girl’s friends, she said there were no reports of any violence, no restraint, no one being forced to do anything against her will. Most kids “meandered away to give them some privacy, I guess,” Staff Sgt. Barber says.

Police confiscated one cellphone; no photos or video were recovered. The girl was checked at the hospital and released. Charges of “sexual interference” — commonly called statutory rape — are pending, because the girl’s age, relative to the boy’s, means she cannot have legally consented to the sex.

“It is kind of unfortunate that this has been portrayed as a random, violent attack,” Staff Sgt. Barber says.

[ZenOps]

Just two kids getting off, nothing new.

"Fucking and Punching" Californication season 1.