Busted Smoking Weed

[dharminder]

This is a question for parents on this forum and anyone with some insight.
With out going into a long drawn out story here are the points
-14 year old son
-caught smoking weed at school
-she is separated from her husband
-boy lives with dad majority of the week and weekends at her place
-dad and boy did not tell her that he was caught and suspended
-school informed her that he was suspended

Not being a parent I would not know how to go about this but my first reaction was beat the kid(for some that dont understand a joke I am not talking literally).
Other then that my suggestion was that he has started/experimented with it means it might be situations were the ship has sailed to try to stop him from doing it.

Also are there any cops on the forum? If so would you pm me please. Thought is maybe try to scare the shit out of him if a cop showed up at his school or his house. Or just even meet him at the cop shop and just lock him up for an hour or so.

[CMW403]

Trolls are getting entertaining

[desi112]

Originally posted by CMW403
Trolls are getting entertaining

i fail to see a troll.

wait your the troll?

[Tik-Tok]

Maybe I'd be more lenient since I smoked in highschool (not until much later though), but I'd basically just tell him moderation is the key, and if I start to see his grades go down at all, there isn't a chance in hell he's getting a drivers license while under my roof.

In my day, drivers license > weed for 99% of the kids I knew.

[peteski]

Originally posted by dharminder

Not being a parent I would not know how to go about this but my first reaction was beat the kid.


Okay not cool to hide it from mom, not cool to smoke weed, and extra uncool to say your first reaction would be to beat the kid.This is CANADA asswipe and violence isn't the answer around here. You wanna beat a kid for making a mistake and live by the sword like uncivilized barbarians do it where you came from.

When in Rome, asshole. I hope that kid gets the help and direction he needs to not lie to his mom and stay off that garbage, and I also pray to The Lord that you are NEVER blessed with the gift of having a child.

[89coupe]

I would take him down to the homeless hilton and show him where he would be hanging out if he kept up his brain debilitating habit.

Then I would confiscate everything that he has other then his clothes & school supplies.

Then I would give him an ultimatum, smarten up on your own, or be monitored 24/7

[dharminder]

Originally posted by peteski


Okay not cool to hide it from mom, not cool to smoke weed, and extra uncool to say your first reaction would be to beat the kid.This is CANADA asswipe and violence isn't the answer around here. You wanna beat a kid for making a mistake and live by the sword like uncivilized barbarians do it where you came from.

When in Rome, asshole. I hope that kid gets the help and direction he needs to not lie to his mom and stay off that garbage, and I also pray to The Lord that you are NEVER blessed with the gift of having a child.

Its a fucken joke relax ok beating a kid is not going to get you anywere. Dont get all gangster on a the computer.

[wintonyk]

Negativity towards the weed is just gonna bring more negativity. He will just continue with the weed behind her back out of spite.

I don't smoke it, but i have zero problem with people that do (other than it smells nasty), but making sure he knows the environments where it is and isn't appropriate. I had zero influence from my parents and i made the decision myself that it wasn't for me.

I had a buddy almost kicked out of university for smoking up on campus. He still smokes but certainly not on campus.

[peteski]

Originally posted by dharminder


Its a fucken joke relax ok beating a kid is not going to get you anywere. Dont get all gangster on a the computer.

If it's a joke then I'm sorry dude... Shit... Kinda not funny to joke about beating kids, don't you think? But for what it's worth I do apologize, I'm a powder keg for shit like this...

On a lighter note, my parents tried the whole scare u straight thing with me when I went thru my rebellious phase... All it did was add fuel to the fire. Observe and educate. Find a way to make erratic behavior look "totally uncool" to teenagers. I think confiscating, Nazi discipline, curfews and the likes of which all just aggravate the situation. We all enjoy a challenge and always have, right?

[desi112]

a

[desi112]

Originally posted by peteski


Okay not cool to hide it from mom, not cool to smoke weed, and extra uncool to say your first reaction would be to beat the kid.This is CANADA asswipe and violence isn't the answer around here. You wanna beat a kid for making a mistake and live by the sword like uncivilized barbarians do it where you came from.

When in Rome, asshole. I hope that kid gets the help and direction he needs to not lie to his mom and stay off that garbage, and I also pray to The Lord that you are NEVER blessed with the gift of having a child.

dick-wod, why don't you go back where you come from? In Canada we preach by kindness not rough words...where are you from, must be a fucking eatern europ....

get my point. Fuck assuming he's from somewhere else, when he very well could know no other place.

Douche-bag

[peteski]

Originally posted by desi112


dick-wod, why don't you go back where you come from? In Canada we preach by kindness not rough words...where are you from, must be a fucking eatern europ....

get my point. Fuck assuming he's from somewhere else, when he very well could know no other place.

Douche-bag

Yup I'm a wop, and you can't spell.

[calgarygts]

Originally posted by peteski
I also pray to The Lord that you are NEVER blessed with the gift of having a child.

I'm not sure if the flying spaghetti monster can fulfill a request like that but I guess there's no harm in praying to him about it.

[dharminder]

Originally posted by peteski


If it's a joke then I'm sorry dude... Shit... Kinda not funny to joke about beating kids, don't you think? But for what it's worth I do apologize, I'm a powder keg for shit like this...

On a lighter note, my parents tried the whole scare u straight thing with me when I went thru my rebellious phase... All it did was add fuel to the fire. Observe and educate. Find a way to make erratic behavior look "totally uncool" to teenagers. I think confiscating, Nazi discipline, curfews and the likes of which all just aggravate the situation. We all enjoy a challenge and always have, right?

All good dont worry about it. Beat might not be the right choice of word to use, because I would assume every parents first reaction is they want to ring the kid's neck.

[old&slow]

Guy posts a question. Thread turn to Malice in one reply.
You guys have way to much time on your hands...and little common sense! Or else your all 12!!

[topmade]

Giving the kid shit will only make him not want to talk or listen to you. It's like the saying it's easier to catch bees with honey rather then vinegar. And chances are is that the boy is learning these habbits from his outstanding father, so if you want to beat anyone, beat the father. I would try to show him what this type of behaviour is going to look like 10-20 years down the road to let him know what type of life he's heading for.

[texasnick]

Originally posted by peteski


If it's a joke then I'm sorry dude... Shit... Kinda not funny to joke about beating kids, don't you think? But for what it's worth I do apologize, I'm a powder keg for shit like this

meh, some kids need to be beat. If I didn't have the fear of beatings put into me as a kid, I would have been WAY worse than I was. The belt always made me smarten up.

Some moms confront other parents who physically discipline their children in public places and talk about how it's wrong and all this.....my mom would have offered to hold their purse for them.

I dont' really consider weed any more harmful than alcohol, but 14 is too young IMO to start smoking anything....drinking too. Just my opinion though.

[Mitsu3000gt]

Just be calm, talk to the kid like an adult, educate him, and be reasonable about it. Getting pissed off (or a beating lol) will only make the kid do it more out of spite.

[kvg]

I'm not saying this to be a troll, but how is this your concern? Did the parents ask for your input? Are you family? :dunno:

[takkyu]

Originally posted by texasnick


meh, some kids need to be beat. If I didn't have the fear of beatings put into me as a kid, I would have been WAY worse than I was. The belt always made me smarten up.

Some moms confront other parents who physically discipline their children in public places and talk about how it's wrong and all this.....my mom would have offered to hold their purse for them.

I dont' really consider weed any more harmful than alcohol, but 14 is too young IMO to start smoking anything....drinking too. Just my opinion though. :werd:

[bubbley]

a bit of sheeba never hurt nobody...unless he is not doing good in school?

[EK 2.0]

Originally posted by 89coupe

I would take him down to the homeless hilton and show him where he would be hanging out if he kept up his brain debilitating habit.


I'm sorry what??...

"Brain Debilitating"??...Maybe for someone who is weak minded to begin with. But no, thank you for coming out....

[zipdoa]

Maybe instead of scolding the kid and bitching him out, do what most parents don't.

Ask him what's up, shut your mouth and listen. If you have any sort of relationship with your kid, he'll open up. Sometimes an incident like this can be a cry for help/attention - don't ignore it.

[desi112]

i think when people say beating, they mean a slap or two, not a beat down right?

[89coupe]

Originally posted by EK 2.0



I'm sorry what??...

"Brain Debilitating"??...Maybe for someone who is weak minded to begin with. But no, thank you for coming out....

B R A I N D E B I L I T A T I N G

Definition of DEBILITATE
transitive verb
: to impair the strength of : enfeeble
— de·bil·i·ta·tion \-ˌbi-lə-ˈtâ-shən\ noun
See debilitate defined for English-language learners »
Examples of DEBILITATE
The virus debilitates the body's immune system.
<the heart surgery debilitated the college athlete beyond his worst fears>
Origin of DEBILITATE
Latin debilitatus, past participle of debilitare to weaken, from debilis weak
First Known Use: 1533
Related to DEBILITATE
Synonyms: weaken, devitalize, enervate, enfeeble, etiolate, prostrate, sap, soften, tire, waste

[texasnick]

Just 1 hard slap that's totally unexpected is all I usually needed. I was mostly just joking....although I do believe in physical discipline for kids.

The problem is, the kid is already 14. A slap or the belt isn't going to deter anything. It works as a way to prevent them from effing up. Not the best to be used as a punishment on a 14 yo who's already done wrong.

2 good friends of mine have a 5 yo daughter, and they won't lay a hand on her. Instead, they prefer to speak to her as an adult and tell her why her actions are undesireable. Guess what? The kid is NOT afraid of Mommy and Daddy and is a complete nightmare to babysit. You can't get her to do literally ANYTHING that she doesn't want to do.

[bashir26]

only thing id be worried about is all the other drugs your son is exposed to when buying weed.

[EK 2.0]

Originally posted by 89coupe

blah, blah. blah


I know what it means. But it is hardly debilitating. Again, I stand beside my original thought that if you are of a weak mind to begin with then yes. But smoking good weed everyday has had no ill effects on a lot of people I know. Including myself.

[J-hop]

well I have a similar story. I was maybe a year or two older when I tried it. I was hanging out with some scum bags and they passed the joint and I thought why not? so I did it, got high as shit and went home. Mom ended up catching me high.

The biggest effect on me was that my mom wasn't mad. She was disappointed, she talk to me about my uncle that had got heavy into drugs (starting with weed) and I already knew he was a piece of shit so I didnt want to be like him.

She asked me why I did it, and I honestly couldn't come up with a good reason. Me being a logical person thought afterward and couldn't even justify to myself why I had done it. I made a deal with my Mom right after she talked to me that I would never do it again, and I haven't done it (or any other drugs for that matter) since. I think it has been 9 or 10 years now.

The problem is, the kid is going to decide for himself and there isn't a heck of a lot you can do. He is either a straight shooter or not. The biggest thing is to not get mad, and sit down and have a mature conversation with him. Do not try to scare him, especially with authority, he will just develop a hatred for authority.

All you can do now is talk to him about it and hope that he is a smart guy and will make the right decision.

edit: also if I am understanding the story correctly, talk to the husband about it and make sure he is on board with not supporting the kid in doing things like this. The most influential parent is the same sex parent. So hopefully the dad can man up and talk to his son about it as well.

[89coupe]

Originally posted by EK 2.0



I know what it means. But it is hardly debilitating. Again, I stand beside my original thought that if you are of a weak mind to begin with then yes. But smoking good weed everyday has had no ill effects on a lot of people I know. Including myself.

I'm sure some drug users have made it through University and went on to a successful career and maybe they continue to do drugs and continue to be successful, but I think if you did a survey, it would be at the bottom of the bell curve ;)

[EK 2.0]

Originally posted by 89coupe


I'm sure some drug users have made it through University and went on to a successful career and maybe they continue to do drugs and continue to be successful, but I think if you did a survey, it would be at the bottom of the bell curve ;)



Then again that points right to my point of people with a weak mind.

And besides, university shouldn't be a milestone as to whether or not someone is successful. I hold a masters degree, but don't use it haha...Neither should a "high paying" job or career. To some just being happy in doing something they love is more success than a 6 figure salary and car allowances.

[Mibz]

I got suspended when I was 13. My Dad gave me a forehand across the jaw. I learned my lesson.

I'm not saying it's the only way, but I'll be damned if I sit here and listen to people telling me I was raised improperly.

[89coupe]

Originally posted by EK 2.0


Then again that points right to my point of people with a weak mind.

And besides, university shouldn't be a milestone as to whether or not someone is successful. I hold a masters degree, but don't use it haha...Neither should a &quot;high paying&quot; job or career. To some just being happy in doing something they love is more success than a 6 figure salary and car allowances.

I agree, about the happy part, but I'm pretty sure you don't need pot to be happy ;)

As the old saying goes, "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink."

[texasnick]

Originally posted by 89coupe


I'm sure some drug users have made it through University and went on to a successful career and maybe they continue to do drugs and continue to be successful, but I think if you did a survey, it would be at the bottom of the bell curve ;)

LOL ignorance must be bliss.

Chicken or the Egg, man.

[dharminder]

The mom is a friend of mine and asked me what she should do regarding this matter.

A belt might be to much I think mind you I never got the belt but I did get the good slap for fucking up. That was enough for me not to do it again.

I have smoked weed in the past, I would say its safe to say that good majority of people have, the only difference in this case is that I tried it when I was 20. I know alot of people that smoke weed on a regular bases but at such a young age of 14 might lead to other drugs.

[ddduke]

The only thing that I'd be worried about is if you come down really hard on the kid he might just hide it better. It can really go either way. Maybe explain/show him how it may fuck up his life then closely monitor him when he comes home. If he keeps fucking up, then lay down the hammer.


Originally posted by peteski
This is CANADA asswipe and violence isn't the answer around here. You wanna beat a kid for making a mistake and live by the sword like uncivilized barbarians do it where you came from.

When in Rome, asshole. I hope that kid gets the help and direction he needs to not lie to his mom and stay off that garbage, and I also pray to The Lord that you are NEVER blessed with the gift of having a child.

I wouldn't say beating your kids is fine, but a good smack now and then is fine. My dad was stern with me and I turned out alright, I also learned my boundaries. Kids have to know who's boss and in this day and age most don't.

[legendboy]

Originally posted by J-hop
well I have a similar story. I was maybe a year or two older when I tried it. I was hanging out with some scum bags and they passed the joint and I thought why not? so I did it, got high as shit and went home. Mom ended up catching me high.

The biggest effect on me was that my mom wasn't mad. She was disappointed, she talk to me about my uncle that had got heavy into drugs (starting with weed) and I already knew he was a piece of shit so I didnt want to be like him.

She asked me why I did it, and I honestly couldn't come up with a good reason. Me being a logical person thought afterward and couldn't even justify to myself why I had done it. I made a deal with my Mom right after she talked to me that I would never do it again, and I haven't done it (or any other drugs for that matter) since. I think it has been 9 or 10 years now.

The problem is, the kid is going to decide for himself and there isn't a heck of a lot you can do. He is either a straight shooter or not. The biggest thing is to not get mad, and sit down and have a mature conversation with him. Do not try to scare him, especially with authority, he will just develop a hatred for authority.

All you can do now is talk to him about it and hope that he is a smart guy and will make the right decision.

edit: also if I am understanding the story correctly, talk to the husband about it and make sure he is on board with not supporting the kid in doing things like this. The most influential parent is the same sex parent. So hopefully the dad can man up and talk to his son about it as well.

This is what I wish my parents would have done. Would have likely saved me many years of fucking up my life.




Originally posted by dharminder
The mom is a friend of mine and asked me what she should do regarding this matter.

A belt might be to much I think mind you I never got the belt but I did get the good slap for fucking up. That was enough for me not to do it again.

I have smoked weed in the past, I would say its safe to say that good majority of people have, the only difference in this case is that I tried it when I was 20. I know alot of people that smoke weed on a regular bases but at such a young age of 14 might lead to other drugs.

Its not age that will lead to other drugs, its his personality, people he is hanging out with, relationship with his family, self esteem...etc...

[old&slow]

Originally posted by zipdoa
Maybe instead of scolding the kid and bitching him out, do what most parents don't.

Ask him what's up, shut your mouth and listen. If you have any sort of relationship with your kid, he'll open up. Sometimes an incident like this can be a cry for help/attention - don't ignore it.


Smartest reply so far. Sit with him over lunch or coffee and just let him talk! All you have to do is be interested in him.

[95teetee]

Originally posted by 89coupe


I'm sure some drug users have made it through University and went on to a successful career and maybe they continue to do drugs and continue to be successful, but I think if you did a survey, it would be at the bottom of the bell curve ;) funny note- the last two days, we've been working on my neighbour's father's house (installing windows).
He has grad pictures of all the grandkid's on one wall. One of his sons (my neighbour) smokes pot with his kids (I've seen it). Guess which son's kids aren't up on the grad picture wall:rofl:

[89coupe]

Show this to the 14 year old boy.

6rPFvLUWkzs

[n1zm0]

^ yeah he got an interview setup with good morning america or whatever? good for him lol


Originally posted by EK 2.0
I know what it means. But it is hardly debilitating. Again, I stand beside my original thought that if you are of a weak mind to begin with then yes. But smoking good weed everyday has had no ill effects on a lot of people I know.

:werd: i dont smoke it now that often, did in HS as well as 3/4 of my grade from that graduating year pretty much, i didnt see any ppl's lives lead straight to permanent residency at the mustard seed kinda thing, not one in fact from the ppl i stay in touch with. even those who did it in moderation and those who couldnt go 3-4 hours without a joint, no one is a crazed homeless bum that i know of.

I went through the whole phase and a bit more than most and to think back now, its the ppl you hang around, your influences and basic outcry for the most part, also seeing and hearing what older ppl in HS did made you want to one up that and make your own 'teenage life experience' memorable. just my opinion.

if you are weak-minded like EK said whether you were brought up like that or just act like that, the potential to call weed a gateway drug increases exponentially with the lack of self control, because whoever theyre getting their weed off of ( the dealer) most likely knows someone or carries harder drugs on them, it's inevitable that one day the customer will ask or the dealer will try to push something new on them and when that time comes: it's all about will power and limits which unfortunately are 2 values that some ppl dont possess and they start sliding down the shitrope.

[BrknFngrs]

Originally posted by n1zm0
I went through the whole phase and a bit more than most and to think back now, its the ppl you hang around, your influences and basic outcry for the most part, also seeing and hearing what older ppl in HS did made you want to one up that and make your own 'teenage life experience' memorable. just my opinion.

if you are weak-minded like EK said whether you were brought up like that or just act like that, the potential to call weed a gateway drug increases exponentially with the lack of self control, because whoever theyre getting their weed off of ( the dealer) most likely knows someone or carries harder drugs on them, it's inevitable that one day the customer will ask or the dealer will try to push something new on them and when that time comes: it's all about will power and limits which unfortunately are 2 values that some ppl dont possess and they start sliding down the shitrope.

If you want to look at it this way, then there is a significant connection between weed and harder drugs because a person that is intelligent enough not to smoke week also realizes that drug dealers are dirt bags and it's unlikely that they'd just jump all over an offer of harder drugs from one of them.

Alternatively, if you go on to tell your kid that weed is great, lots of successful people love weed, etc etc etc you've now made drug dealers a legitimate person for your kid to deal with on a regular basis. I think it's a lot more likely that your kid is going to accept other drugs from a dealer in this situation.

[Afrodeziak]

I figure pot smoking starts young for kids when those kids have nothing better to do with their time. ie. no activities or mentorship. Sports are the obvious first thing in school, to teach them discipline, interaction with peers, etc. Art, traveling, photography, music, learn an instrument etc etc. I hate to say it, but most kids probably list video games as their top hobby now. At 14 a person is not ruined, they are merely discovering.. I find it hard think that at 22 he'll still be interested in it, as it gets a bit old after time (know someone who went this route).

After school fun should not = sitting around at some dead-beat kids house smoking and getting into their parents liquor stash. I know first hand a couple of old friends that got way too deep into the rabbit hole of smoking weed and now don't know reality from the dreamworld they seem to speak in. Yea they both are crazy as bats, and showed no signs of this kind of thing early. The one thing they both have in common is divorced parents. Go figure.

[EK 2.0]

Originally posted by BrknFngrs

Alternatively, if you go on to tell your kid that weed is great, lots of successful people love weed, etc etc etc you've now made drug dealers a legitimate person for your kid to deal with on a regular basis. I think it's a lot more likely that your kid is going to accept other drugs from a dealer in this situation.


I am not going to go out and tell my child to smoke weed. Or make drug dealers legitimate people to deal with...But, I will talk to my kids about drugs. And about the pitfalls of yes what even weed could POTENIALLY lead into. But, I will raise my children (if I ever have any) the the same manner in which I was raised and in offering them someone they should be able to come to, and feel safe and at ease enough to come to and ask questions about drugs.

[dannie]

Originally posted by dharminder
This is a question for parents on this forum and anyone with some insight.
With out going into a long drawn out story here are the points
-14 year old son
-caught smoking weed at school
-she is separated from her husband
-boy lives with dad majority of the week and weekends at her place
-dad and boy did not tell her that he was caught and suspended
-school informed her that he was suspended

Not being a parent I would not know how to go about this but my first reaction was beat the kid(for some that dont understand a joke I am not talking literally).
Other then that my suggestion was that he has started/experimented with it means it might be situations were the ship has sailed to try to stop him from doing it.

Also are there any cops on the forum? If so would you pm me please. Thought is maybe try to scare the shit out of him if a cop showed up at his school or his house. Or just even meet him at the cop shop and just lock him up for an hour or so.

I think that everyone is missing a pretty important part to all of this. The other parent and the kid himself, hid it from the mom. She didn't find out until the school informed her that the kid was suspended.

The first thing I would do is talk to the other parent in private and ask wtf. That behaviour in itself is beyond inappropriate. It's telling this kid that it's ok to lie or hide things from your parents.

Perhaps if both parents sat down with the kid and asked whats wrong, they could actually get somewhere. Sitting down and having seperate conversations about the same thing seems rather redundant.

It sounds to me like the parents need to sort thru their own crap first and then attempt to help the kid.

[EK 2.0]

Originally posted by dannie

I think that everyone is missing a pretty important part to all of this.


I didn't miss it. I just have no input on that situation haha...But I have issues when people say weed is bad for you and it leads into crime, and depair, and a downward spiral.

[n1zm0]

Originally posted by BrknFngrs
Alternatively, if you go on to tell your kid that weed is great, lots of successful people love weed, etc etc etc you've now made drug dealers a legitimate person for your kid to deal with on a regular basis. I think it's a lot more likely that your kid is going to accept other drugs from a dealer in this situation.

yeah good point but that will never ever overcome the 2 biggest factors and most affecting that will always be forever present at that age, peer pressure and experimenting.

edit:


Originally posted by EK 2.0
But I have issues when people say weed is bad for you and it leads into crime, and depair, and a downward spiral.

oh you mean thefans of this movie? lol :

http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/e/e2/ReeferMadnessPoster.jpg

[C_Dave45]

Originally posted by 89coupe
Show this to the 14 year old boy.

(youtube clip)

So what? What's your point Brad? That there's bums out there who have ruined their lives by drugs? Big deal. There's just as many bums who've done that by alcohol alone. There's also millions of people who have no trouble handling marijuana. Yes millions. A lot more than you seem to think. For every 10 strangers that you come in contact with on any given day, probably 3 or 4 of them use marijuana, and you'd never know. Around 15 million Canadians have tried pot in their lives. More than 4 million use it regularly.

If my kid came home at 14 with the same trouble as the OP, I wouldn't view it any differently if he came home with a suspension because of alcohol, or cigarettes. When my kids were growing up, marijuana was used by me and my wife...but our kids knew that we viewed it no differently than the "legal" vices. When they become an adult, they can smoke weed, drink, or smoke cigarettes. Until then it was off limits because they were kids.

We're all quite aware of your own personal "look-down-the-nose" attitude towards marijuana...but that's all it is. A personal opinion. Just because you can cite examples of people who've ruined their lives because of drugs, doesn't mean marijuana is bad for everyone.

I'd say the problem in the OP's scenario has nothing to do with marijuana..but more to do with just discipline and communication with both parents in general.

[texasnick]

Originally posted by C_Dave45
I'd say the problem in the OP's scenario has nothing to do with marijuana..but more to do with just discipline in general.

/thread

[J-hop]

Originally posted by C_Dave45


So what? What's your point Brad? That there's bums out there who have ruined their lives by drugs? Big deal. There's just as many bums who've done that by alcohol alone. There's also millions of people who have no trouble handling marijuana. Yes millions. A lot more than you seem to think. For every 10 strangers that you come in contact with on any given day, probably 3 or 4 of them use marijuana, and you'd never know. Around 15 million Canadians have tried pot in their lives. More than 4 million use it regularly.

If my kid came home at 14 with the same trouble as the OP, I wouldn't view it any differently if he came home with a suspension because of alcohol, or cigarettes. When my kids were growing up, marijuana was used by me and my wife...but our kids knew that we viewed it no differently than the &quot;legal&quot; vices. When they become an adult, they can smoke weed, drink, or smoke cigarettes. Until then it was off limits because they were kids.

We're all quite aware of your own personal &quot;look-down-the-nose&quot; attitude towards marijuana...but that's all it is. A personal opinion. Just because you can cite examples of people who've ruined their lives because of drugs, doesn't mean marijuana is bad for everyone.

I'd say the problem in the OP's scenario has nothing to do with marijuana..but more to do with just discipline and communication with both parents in general.


I think what 89 is more going for is that you should deter your kids away from doing stuff like this until they are old enough to make that decision for themselves (not simply by setting a date where they are "allowed" to do it)

I am assuming that you may have smoked up in front of your kids or at least they knew when you were smoking up. This already ingrains a level of encouragement to participate in this and they will look towards turning 18 (or whatever magical date was set for them) as the day they are allowed to do this and IMO will further encourage them to do this because to them it may seem like a "coming of age" activity.

Parents have a huge influence on their kids, I for one have grown up aspiring to be like my father, and as such I've taken on similar morals. When a parent participates in a practice like smoking weed, in front or around their children it already opens that door and more or less gives them a shove through (IMO). Every kid whether they show it or not looks up to their parents, and for that brief 18 years IMO you should try to be the best possible role model you can be.

Everyone knows drugs and alcohol CAN (not will) lead to a destructive life, so the best thing to do is to not promote it until they are old enough to decide for themselves. But at the same time, don't discourage it like its the ultimate sin, or they will just rebel against you when they are old enough and end up down the same path.

I think a great example is smoking, out of my friends I'd say about 80% of them with smoking parents took it up for a period of time before they turned 20. Where as maybe one or two of my friends that has non smoking parents, took up smoking. Of course this is just personal experience and probably has no statistical basis but I thought it was interesting to see in my friends how much they followed in their parents footsteps.

[codetrap]

Originally posted by 89coupe


B R A I N D E B I L I T A T I N G

Definition of DEBILITATE
transitive verb
: to impair the strength of : enfeeble
— de·bil·i·ta·tion \-&amp;#716;bi-l&amp;#601;-&amp;#712;tâ-sh&amp;#601;n\ noun
See debilitate defined for English-language learners »
Examples of DEBILITATE
The virus debilitates the body's immune system.
&lt;the heart surgery debilitated the college athlete beyond his worst fears&gt;
Origin of DEBILITATE
Latin debilitatus, past participle of debilitare to weaken, from debilis weak
First Known Use: 1533
Related to DEBILITATE
Synonyms: weaken, devitalize, enervate, enfeeble, etiolate, prostrate, sap, soften, tire, waste


I saw this response to EK and I had to laugh. Door opened, and walked through.

My own personal experience, my observations of others, and the medical community all agree that when you're high, you're intoxicated, maybe a little, maybe a lot. But the simple truth is that when you're high, you're running at suboptimal mental capacity. For some, it's not a big deal, knocking a few usable IQ points off isn't going to really slow them down a whole lot. Others, well, they're going to see a lot more impact.

There is also proven medical evidence that shows it impairs your ability to learn, and your memory while you're under the influence.

So EK2.0, technically, he's right. It is debilitating your brain. I tried to find that video of Homer reality vs fantasy when drunk. The one where in his mind he's having that sparkling conversation and is the life of the party, but in reality he's drunk and drooling. At least I think it was the Simpsons.. can't really remember, might have been stoned at the time.

[EK 2.0]

Originally posted by codetrap

So EK2.0, technically, he's right. It is debilitating your brain. I tried to find that video of Homer reality vs fantasy when drunk. The one where in his mind he's having that sparkling conversation and is the life of the party, but in reality he's drunk and drooling. At least I think it was the Simpsons.. can't really remember, might have been stoned at the time.



I know exactly what it is you are talking about. And I will agree that on alcohol (and there is one person on these boards who can certainly vouch) I am strait messed up. I would like to think that while intoxicated on booze that I would be eloquent, and suave and fully intact and in control of my motor skills but that is simply not the case. I can admit to that.

But for weed on the other hand. I can, have, and do fully function just as well as when I am not high. I wrote university exams, and papers while high and still maintained at least a 3.8 GPA...Can I drive while high??...FUCK no, I am far too paranoid to even try haha. But as for normal functions...I am just fine. As are a lot of people that I smoke with. When I choose not to smoke and watch them high as kite they are normal to me. Yes there are exceptions...maybe even perhaps my small group of friends are that exception that people talk about I don't know and I can't say. But smoking a little chron, or green, or doi cho, or momoy, or banghee ain't never hurt no one that I am associated with, led them down an incidious path. And that is all I am trying to say here. That it ALL boils down to the person and their own mental capacity. And that is not only for weed, but booze, sex, gambling, fuck even coffee. If you are of weak mind you will perhaps head into a downward spiral.

[codetrap]

Originally posted by EK 2.0

I know exactly what it is you are talking about. And I will agree that on alcohol (and there is one person on these boards who can certainly vouch) I am strait messed up. I would like to think that while intoxicated on booze that I would be eloquent, and suave and fully intact and in control of my motor skills but that is simply not the case. I can admit to that.

But for weed on the other hand. I can, have, and do fully function just as well as when I am not high. I wrote university exams, and papers while high and still maintained at least a 3.8 GPA...Can I drive while high??...FUCK no, I am far too paranoid to even try haha. But as for normal functions...I am just fine. As are a lot of people that I smoke with. When I choose not to smoke and watch them high as kite they are normal to me. Yes there are exceptions...maybe even perhaps my small group of friends are that exception that people talk about I don't know and I can't say. But smoking a little chron, or green, or doi cho, or momoy, or banghee ain't never hurt no one that I am associated with, led them down an incidious path. And that is all I am trying to say here. That is ALL boils down to the person and their own mental capacity. And that is not only for weed, but booze, sex, gambling, fuck even coffee. If you are of weak mind you will perhaps head into a downward spiral.

Yeah, I agree. For arguments sake, a 10% reduction in motor skills and mental acuity due to weed probably doesn't slow you down much at all. Someone else knocks off 10%, and they have to stop walking to take a breath while chewing gum. I've known, and know both types. Guys that had such potential but totally blew their lives for 15 years because they were chronic. Now they're 35-40, and starting on their careers, or simply still working (what I consider) dead end jobs. Talking to them now, and they're retarded. Not in the special needs sense, but in social/mental development. Weed just froze them in the same state they when they were in high school. It's sad to be around them. Others were scary smart enough and weed just brought them down to tolerable to be around. Everyone was affected differently.

For me, I need everything I can get, so I tend to avoid using, not that I haven't indulged the odd time.

[master hec0]

Originally posted by C_Dave45

I wouldn't view it any differently if he came home with a suspension because of alcohol, or cigarettes.





:thumbsup:

[speedog]

To the OP - I will be turning 50 this year and have 3 kids (12, 16 and 19) and can says that most of the problem in the case you've described is purely due to a complete lack of communication and trust in that family. My kids can talk to my wife and I about anything and I mean anything - sex, alcohol, drugs, the day's current news and politics. It's all debated at the dinner table and elsewhere and it amazes our kid's friends who come over to see and hear such open conversations. Our kids have been educated from a very young age about alcohol, drugs and sex and while we rarely drink in our home, the kids have been allowed wine and beer (in moderation) before they were of legal age. Drugs - we don't do them and as such they're not in our home, but we've made our kids well aware of them and if anything, our 17 year old niece's 2 month stay at a lock-down rehab facility certainly showed them what the negative effects can be. Even previous cop rides home at 3:00 in the morning didn't scare her away from the path that took her into rehab and I'm not necessarily convinced that she's not going to relapse again either.

This 14 year old friend of yours - the drugs aren't the real problem that needs to be addressed. The real problem is the lack of open communication between all three parties and I suspect that a good majority of this boy's life has been spent in a less than ideal family unit situation. You won't be able to magically fix anything overnight and physical threats will do no one any good. Instead, consider becoming a mentor/sounding board for this kid, but be well aware that this may very well require some major time and emotional commitments. Not all is lost here, but lying/being deceitful is a very ominous warning sign of more problems to come IMHO.

[rage2]

Originally posted by peteski
This is CANADA asswipe and violence isn't the answer around here. You wanna beat a kid for making a mistake and live by the sword like uncivilized barbarians do it where you came from.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3PTNV0THy0#t=2m43s

Timeout is sweet!

[HuMz]

Originally posted by 89coupe
I would take him down to the homeless hilton and show him where he would be hanging out if he kept up his brain debilitating habit.

Then I would confiscate everything that he has other then his clothes &amp; school supplies.

Then I would give him an ultimatum, smarten up on your own, or be monitored 24/7

This seems to be a pretty old style of view and is definitely not the way to go. High school kids who smoke weed aren't stuipd. They know that weed has been proven too be much less harmful then originally thought and they also know that many of there very successfull friends dads smoke a bit of weed and they've gotten by just fine.

So to tell a kid that its going to ruin his life and he is going to end up a lowlife is a slap in the face as to how clueless his parents are and will just make him rebel more.

Sit the kid down, tell him what he did was wrong and illegal. But you also have too be understanding about it in the sense that its not like hes smoking crack, and that when hes older it will be up too him whether or not he wants to smoke weed. Just too keep in mind that anything outside of moderation can lead to problems no matter how strong or smart they think they are.

[HuMz]

Originally posted by 89coupe


I'm sure some drug users have made it through University and went on to a successful career and maybe they continue to do drugs and continue to be successful, but I think if you did a survey, it would be at the bottom of the bell curve ;)

The numbers are alot higher then you think. The reason being, most successful people aren't going to openly admit to certain family and other co-workers that they smoke weed unless there aware they know the other person smokes weed or has a liberal stance on it.

You can bet theres quite a few friends, family, and co-workers in your circle who like to have the occasional hoot they just won't tell you because of the type of person you are.

[HiTempguy1]

Originally posted by HuMz


The numbers are alot higher then you think.

Keep telling yourself that (re: beyond weed poll). Beyond is liberal as shit compared to society (as I see it), and its still well below the 50% level (for even trying it once IIRC). So I think that the numbers are a LOT lower than you think. 1 in 10 is probably a solid number. I'd be surprised if it was 1/5.

[Muji]

I find it mildly entertaining the level of panic among some of you (others make very valid points), perhaps some of us have had more experiences in our lives, linking a bit of recreational weed to the end of days is a tad extreme. If the kid was drinking a beer, same level of panic? What if the kid had the following medical conditions:

+ Epilepsy
+ Multiple Sclerosis
+ Arthritis
+ HIV / AIDS
+ Spinal Cord Injury
+ Spinal Cord Disease
+ Cancer

All legally a condition a doctor might write you a prescription for medical marijuana in Canada and some of the USA.

http://www.medicalmarihuana.ca/

Show me a solid study linking the use of light drugs to a less than "normal" life and we can discuss. Frankly, all the potheads in the world worry me less than the drunks. In my world, I have never once seen any negative actions from the stoners, as for the drunks..... Ask a bouncer which causes him more concern, maybe ask a cop.

Yes the kid is 14 years of age, yes he should be confronted with compassion and treated as a young adult, all this needs to be practiced in a sane environment. If a little weed is going to screw your life away, well it was going to happen anyway. There are many roads to the sewer and a human with enough of an idiot in him/her will certainly find it.

[C_Dave45]

Originally posted by Muji
I find it mildly entertaining the level of panic among some of you (others make very valid points), perhaps some of us have had more experiences in our lives, linking a bit of recreational weed to the end of days is a tad extreme. If the kid was drinking a beer, same level of panic? What if the kid had the following medical conditions:

+ Epilepsy
+ Multiple Sclerosis
+ Arthritis
+ HIV / AIDS
+ Spinal Cord Injury
+ Spinal Cord Disease
+ Cancer

All legally a condition a doctor might write you a prescription for medical marijuana in Canada and some of the USA.

http://www.medicalmarihuana.ca/

Show me a solid study linking the use of light drugs to a less than &quot;normal&quot; life and we can discuss. Frankly, all the potheads in the world worry me less than the drunks. In my world, I have never once seen any negative actions from the stoners, as for the drunks..... Ask a bouncer which causes him more concern, maybe ask a cop.

Yes the kid is 14 years of age, yes he should be confronted with compassion and treated as a young adult, all this needs to be practiced in a sane environment. If a little weed is going to screw your life away, well it was going to happen anyway. There are many roads to the sewer and a human with enough of an idiot in him/her will certainly find it.

Fantastic post!





Originally posted by HiTempguy1


Keep telling yourself that (re: beyond weed poll). Beyond is liberal as shit compared to society (as I see it), and its still well below the 50% level (for even trying it once IIRC). So I think that the numbers are a LOT lower than you think. 1 in 10 is probably a solid number. I'd be surprised if it was 1/5. you're fairly close actually. I was a little heavy in my "estimates". Here are some more accurate numbers.


Cannabis use by all Canadians

2004: 12% of Canadians used cannabis more than once over the past year
2004: 14% of Canadians said they smoked pot some time over the past year
2004: 45.5% of Canadians said they had smoked pot some time in their lives
2002: 25% of adult Canadians have tried cannabis some time in life

source (http://frankdiscussion.netfirms.com/info_statistics.html)


...statistics released in July 2004 suggest more than 10 million Canadians aged 15 or older have tried marijuana or hashish at least once.

So obviously a large number of people...many of whom do not spiral into a crack addicted homeless bum.

Interesting to note that only about 18% of Canadians smoke tobacco as of 2008. (total male and female over 15) source (http://www.smoke-free.ca/factsheets/pdf/prevalence.pdf)

yet we have over 45,000 Canadian deaths per year because of tobacco. How many from marijuana? None.

[rob the knob]

http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshhBtdQvDJLQy55M05q

seen in other thread. good here for action for dad.

[peteski]

Originally posted by Muji
I find it mildly entertaining the level of panic among some of you (others make very valid points), perhaps some of us have had more experiences in our lives, linking a bit of recreational weed to the end of days is a tad extreme. If the kid was drinking a beer, same level of panic? What if the kid had the following medical conditions:

+ Epilepsy
+ Multiple Sclerosis
+ Arthritis
+ HIV / AIDS
+ Spinal Cord Injury
+ Spinal Cord Disease
+ Cancer

All legally a condition a doctor might write you a prescription for medical marijuana in Canada and some of the USA.

http://www.medicalmarihuana.ca/

Show me a solid study linking the use of light drugs to a less than &quot;normal&quot; life and we can discuss. Frankly, all the potheads in the world worry me less than the drunks. In my world, I have never once seen any negative actions from the stoners, as for the drunks..... Ask a bouncer which causes him more concern, maybe ask a cop.


I call bullshit. I haven't smoked weed in 15 years, gave it up when I realized all it did was pull my mind in a million directions and made me realize how miserable and paranoid I truly am. I can turn on the "don't give a fuck" comfortably without smoking that shit. When I did, it just made every last little thing wrong. Then last year when I could barely stand up with a spinal stenosis/herniated disc flareup, I thought, what the hell let's try it out. Been a while, might be different, right? Wrong.

Once again all it did was make my mind race, everything I saw on TV was instantly compared to my life and interpreted as yet another reminder of how I missed the boat and likely will never catch up, kept switching channels and it was doom and gloom everywhere I looked, didn't wanna stay awake, couldn't sleep cuz I was paranoid, and did FUCK ALL for my back pain. Jesus H Christ I couldn't imagine having aids or cancer and trying to "ease my pain" in the state that shit puts my mind in. I think that medical marijuana advocates are little more than self righteous hippies going to incredible lenghts to use, possess, distribute and encourage marijuana use without having the law apply to them. I'm clean now, I don't do drugs anymore, but I'm gonna be brutally honest I'd much rather drink and snort coke than smoke weed any day.

[scboss]

If you would rather do coke (ive assumed you have done it) you got much bigger problems. IMO weed is fine in moderation, one of my friends is a civil engineer and he blazed everyday and finished with a 4.0 gpa.

As for the kid instead of scolding him why dont you tell him why he shouldnt do it. Usually parents always go this dont do this shit route and dont even explain why.

I blaze a couple times per week and yet my grades are good, I go to the gym 5 days a week, I have a gf that is successful and my job is pimp. Opinions are opinions but if weed ruins your life you are a dumbass

[potatopineapple]

Originally posted by peteski


I call bullshit. I haven't smoked weed in 15 years, gave it up when I realized all it did was pull my mind in a million directions and made me realize how miserable and paranoid I truly am. I can turn on the &quot;don't give a fuck&quot; comfortably without smoking that shit. When I did, it just made every last little thing wrong. Then last year when I could barely stand up with a spinal stenosis/herniated disc flareup, I thought, what the hell let's try it out. Been a while, might be different, right? Wrong.

Once again all it did was make my mind race, everything I saw on TV was instantly compared to my life and interpreted as yet another reminder of how I missed the boat and likely will never catch up, kept switching channels and it was doom and gloom everywhere I looked, didn't wanna stay awake, couldn't sleep cuz I was paranoid, and did FUCK ALL for my back pain. Jesus H Christ I couldn't imagine having aids or cancer and trying to &quot;ease my pain&quot; in the state that shit puts my mind in. I think that medical marijuana advocates are little more than self righteous hippies going to incredible lenghts to use, possess, distribute and encourage marijuana use without having the law apply to them. I'm clean now, I don't do drugs anymore, but I'm gonna be brutally honest I'd much rather drink and snort coke than smoke weed any day.


I hope you realize that marijuana affects everyone differently. I personally have the exact same reaction to it as you so I don't smoke. But I'm open minded enough to realize that it could/does help a lot of people.

http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshh4c66zE243tUOG6Re

[peteski]

Originally posted by warcaster
If you would rather do coke (ive assumed you have done it) you got much bigger problems. Opinions are opinions but if weed ruins your life you are a dumbass

I've done every drug known to man short of sticking a needle in my arm. I do have problems. But drugs are no longer one of them for. I was just saying... I had to learn the hard way, and it all started with weed. I hope this kis smartens up before he goes thru what I did. And if he doesn't, hopefully it stays with weed and a few brewskies on weekends, I don't wish the hell of drug addiction on my worst enemy.



Originally posted by potatopineapple



I hope you realize that marijuana affects everyone differently. I personally have the exact same reaction to it as you so I don't smoke. But I'm open minded enough to realize that it could/does help a lot of people.

http://www.worldstarhiphop.com/videos/video.php?v=wshh4c66zE243tUOG6Re

Yes I do, I should have been more clear. Activists and hippies are the ones I have a problem with, not the ones who use it in moderation and function somewhat normally.

[odin7]

I'm with EK on this one, if you're an individual with a 'weak' mind then you're pretty much doomed in any situation, not just one that deals with smoking weed or doing other drugs. Just like many other people on this board I know successful people and unsuccessful people and it has nothing to do with what they inhale or put up their noses. Some people are definitely built for drugs, others aren't. It's very much an individual, case by case type of thing and using your own usage experience to generalize is pretty narrow-minded.

I'm not saying that at the age of 14 he should start trying this stuff but hey, its how it happened. It's up to the parents to help him out right now, try figure out what's the problem, reasons for why he did it, etc. And help him feel comfortable that he can approach either parent instead of hiding it. I can relate with him since thats when I first tried it and what I described before is not how it went down for me but it's something I wish I had when I remember those times. What I did was learn as much as I could about the things I was trying or could have tried.. a few times the things I read, other user experiences, side effects, etc totally put me off the drug. Just knowing how these things could potentially be manufactured is disgusting.. Anyway, the deeper knowledge I obtained about the drug was very comforting and made me feel as if I was making an informed decision. I can't imagine what it would have felt like if I was reading that information with my parents and having their help in making my decision. So.. to me that'd be the most important thing for this kid, help from his parents in educating and making decisions.

As far as the weed discussion goes, the only real problem I have is people calling weed a 'gateway drug'. Green itself doesn't act as a catalyst to doing other drugs, that's just straight BS. It's easily the most widely used soft drug out there and because of its illegal status it gets mixed in to the same black market that hard drugs are a part of. You go out and buy 3.5g of herb and at the same time have the option to buy some coke, heroin or meth all drugs that have ZERO positive qualities. This situation wasn't caused by the effects of the plant itself but by the people wishing to prohibit it's RECREATIONAL use by making it illegal. The reasons behind this have quite the range but the most likely is that MJ is such an efficient way to treat symptoms of serious illnesses that pharmaceutic companies are very afraid of it. These companies have uber deep pockets since they deal with a market of 6 billion people and what they do is lobby to continue making recreational usage of weed illegal and continue providing their legal drugs. So for their gain, they expose millions of users to a very dangerous situation especially when there are quite a few 'weak' minded individuals that partake in smoking weed. It's actually funny that there is a drug called "Marinol" which is exactly the same THC that you get from the plant minus the effect of feeling high. That just screams money grab. Can't smoke a naturally grown plant full of THC but you can take a synthetic pill full of THC that you can only buy from an American corporation..

[4bier]

i dunno its all part of growing up. not very smart he or she got busted at school and suspended ...14 years old and bored thats usally a recipe for disaster. make he or she get a job. or sport activity find a positive function for the person. as for the parents well regardless if there separated they should be on the same page and work together to bring up the child

[alloroc]

Zenops smokes weed.

Show him some of Zenops' posts.

[Spoons]

Whatevs I blazed that shit every day back in highschool and finished with an 85% average. OH SHIT maybe if I didn't smoke I coulda finished with a 90% average... :rolleyes:

He got suspended, so what.

1) He will be smarter next time and not get caught.
2) Couple days off school... Bonus.

I've always questioned on why the suspend kids. If I was the principle I would have continued to document the case, find out exactly where he smokes it and shit, then expell after a good enough case... Then take weed from kid for personal use. When I got suspended all it did was gave me a guidline on how to do it differently next time in order to not get caught.

[TheCheff]

Originally posted by peteski


I call bullshit. I haven't smoked weed in 15 years, gave it up when I realized all it did was pull my mind in a million directions and made me realize how miserable and paranoid I truly am. I can turn on the &quot;don't give a fuck&quot; comfortably without smoking that shit. When I did, it just made every last little thing wrong. Then last year when I could barely stand up with a spinal stenosis/herniated disc flareup, I thought, what the hell let's try it out. Been a while, might be different, right? Wrong.

Once again all it did was make my mind race, everything I saw on TV was instantly compared to my life and interpreted as yet another reminder of how I missed the boat and likely will never catch up, kept switching channels and it was doom and gloom everywhere I looked, didn't wanna stay awake, couldn't sleep cuz I was paranoid, and did FUCK ALL for my back pain. Jesus H Christ I couldn't imagine having aids or cancer and trying to &quot;ease my pain&quot; in the state that shit puts my mind in. I think that medical marijuana advocates are little more than self righteous hippies going to incredible lenghts to use, possess, distribute and encourage marijuana use without having the law apply to them. I'm clean now, I don't do drugs anymore, but I'm gonna be brutally honest I'd much rather drink and snort coke than smoke weed any day.

Sounds like your smoking PCP not weed bruh.

[sevewone]

Originally posted by C_Dave45


yet we have over 45,000 Canadian deaths per year because of tobacco. How many from marijuana? None.

Old boss man I agree with everything else you said but this. I actually met someone whos father died from lung cancer from Smoking weed daily for 20 some years. Never touched a ciggarette in his life but apparently the doctors found nothing but shit coating his lungs. I have absoutely nothing against smoking weed, but I wouldnt go as far as saying its not bad for your lungs.

[C_Dave45]

Originally posted by sevewone


Old boss man I agree with everything else you said but this. I actually met someone whos father died from lung cancer from Smoking weed daily for 20 some years. Never touched a ciggarette in his life but apparently the doctors found nothing but shit coating his lungs. I have absoutely nothing against smoking weed, but I wouldnt go as far as saying its not bad for your lungs.

No I agree, I would never say "its not bad for your lungs". There's obviously damage to lungs from the smoke. But the THC itself wouldn't have been the cause of the cancer...it would be the smoke. It wouldn't surprise me, though, if there WAS the odd death, just none that I can find that has been reported or determined...my (fairly accurate) statement was more or less for a point. None the less, no disrespect and sorry for your loss.

If I could get the same benefits or high from weed without smoking it, I'd be all over that. I can't stand the smoke and the occasional harsh cough. That's why I like the volcano..I think its much safer. I need to buy one.

*edit* LOL....didn't even notice who you were. Hey man, hows it going?

[Rocketright]

Originally posted by C_Dave45


No I agree, I would never say &quot;its not bad for your lungs&quot;. There's obviously damage to lungs from the smoke. But the THC itself wouldn't have been the cause of the cancer...it would be the smoke. It wouldn't surprise me, though, if there WAS the odd death, just none that I can find that has been reported or determined...my (fairly accurate) statement was more or less for a point. None the less, no disrespect and sorry for your loss.

If I could get the same benefits or high from weed without smoking it, I'd be all over that. I can't stand the smoke and the occasional harsh cough. That's why I like the volcano..I think its much safer. I need to buy one.

*edit* LOL....didn't even notice who you were. Hey man, hows it going?

The answer to lung problems is a vaporizer. You can get a good one for about $100, and you will have zero lung problems. It doesn't actually combust, it's just hot air going over the weed to release the THC. Not all of the other crap that you get when you smoke it.

Also it doesn't smell half as much, and you save a lot of money from using it.

[D. Dub]

Originally posted by 89coupe
I would take him down to the homeless hilton and show him where he would be hanging out if he kept up his brain debilitating habit.




IMO showing the 14 year old kid this type of reactionary response will make him trust your worldviews even less; compounding the problem.

Most 14 year olds know the reasons why people are homeless and it's not pot -- it's severe addictions and/or mental illness.

[LollerBrader]

Originally posted by dharminder
This is a question for parents on this forum and anyone with some insight.
With out going into a long drawn out story here are the points
-14 year old son
-caught smoking weed at school
-she is separated from her husband
-boy lives with dad majority of the week and weekends at her place
-dad and boy did not tell her that he was caught and suspended
-school informed her that he was suspended

Not being a parent I would not know how to go about this but my first reaction was beat the kid(for some that dont understand a joke I am not talking literally).
Other then that my suggestion was that he has started/experimented with it means it might be situations were the ship has sailed to try to stop him from doing it.

Also are there any cops on the forum? If so would you pm me please. Thought is maybe try to scare the shit out of him if a cop showed up at his school or his house. Or just even meet him at the cop shop and just lock him up for an hour or so.

Idle hands are the devil's plaything, and kids have a lot of spare time on their hands. Perhaps getting them involved in something that interests them... Sports... Computer training... Part time job. Get him working on his lifeguard/ski guide certification so he can hang out with hot poosay.

It's a shame that such a fuss is being made here. I don't think this is a bad kid. Just do what is necessary to minimize the administrative fallout, and find something to occupy the kid.


// I'd smoke it if I could get it.

[J-hop]

Originally posted by LollerBrader


Idle hands are the devil's plaything, and kids have a lot of spare time on their hands. Perhaps getting them involved in something that interests them...cars



fixed

[Darkane]

Parental respect has been lost through the times.

A little military service would go a long way in our society.

I've never touched the shit. Besides the fact my older brother said he would beat the fuck out of me if I did (and meant it) the way my friends acted high just looked fucking retarded.

To stir the Pot (No pun intended):

Who usually nailed more chicks in school? Smokers or Non-Smokers?

[EG STyLeZ]

For those that have chimed in with their opinion on this matter: how would your opinion change if the minor was suspended for alcohol, tobacco or another substance instead of weed?

[ZenOps]

I'll take the US stance on drugs. Throw down the smackdown!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRHK0K2ii6Q

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kgdyBvHdNKY

[bituerbo]

Originally posted by ZenOps
I'll take the US stance on drugs. Throw down the smackdown!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRHK0K2ii6Q

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kgdyBvHdNKY

Who let you out of the Society/Political forum?

[Kloubek]

Originally posted by EG STyLeZ
For those that have chimed in with their opinion on this matter: how would your opinion change if the minor was suspended for alcohol, tobacco or another substance instead of weed?

I bet that would change a lot of people's minds. Solely because weed is still technically illegal.

My wife is straight as an arrow. No drugs, no booze, no nothing. Hell, if she wasn't my wife I'd swear she never even had sex. So any time my weed smoking is brought up, she is disgusted by it. She views it as criminal. She doesn't mind if I drink here and there - even though alcohol has been proven to potentially mess people up by *far* more than weed. So the (fairly) occasional times I do smoke, I just don't tell her.

Point being: Because it is illegal, people view it as a major issue. The fact is, however, is that I would gladly replace alcohol with weed as the legal substance. While chronic users of it might not have a lot of motivation, at least they would not be killing themselves and destroying their families.

And Dave: While weed doesn't have the same carcinogens as cigarettes do, it still has a high tar content and let's not fool anyone into thinking it's actually not unhealthy. Any time you take smoke into your lungs, it's not technically a good thing.

As far as weed making people stupid and unsuccessful - I suppose the potential really is there. I know myself that when I smoke my IQ drops significantly. And if I were to be constantly stoned, I probably wouldn't function that well. It affects everyone differently. But then, so does alcohol. Most people drink here and there, but don't walk around all day drunk. If they do, there is a problem.

But to say successful lawyers and doctors don't ever have a drink would be ridiculous. As long as it is consumed in moderation, I see no issues with it.

As far as the OP's question goes:

I think the parents have to have more open communication between the two of them. I would not expect the kid to tell the mother what happened (kids lie), but for the good of the child the parents should be talking.

There also needs to be an open talk about drugs, and the pitfalls of them. It can be difficult to deter people from weed due to it being rather benign, but like anything (alcohol, smokes), these kinds of things need to be regulated by the parents up until the child is an adult.

[EG STyLeZ]

Originally posted by Kloubek


I bet that would change a lot of people's minds. Solely because weed is still technically illegal.



Weed is illegal, however let's say the minor was busted drinking or smoking. Being a minor, these activities would still be illegal. So because weed is a narcotic, it makes it *more* illegal and I suppose people would view this as more unfavorable and more wrong.


Originally posted by Kloubek


As far as weed making people stupid and unsuccessful - I suppose the potential really is there. I know myself that when I smoke my IQ drops significantly. And if I were to be constantly stoned, I probably wouldn't function that well. It affects everyone differently. But then, so does alcohol. Most people drink here and there, but don't walk around all day drunk. If they do, there is a problem.



Indeed it does affect everyone differently. There is no doubt that weed has a negative consequence on a person's mental abilities (as any substance does). I think that the difference in effect of a substance is the person's ability to overcome the negative effects and be able to do everyday tasks, etc.

[EK 2.0]

Originally posted by EG STyLeZ
For those that have chimed in with their opinion on this matter: how would your opinion change if the minor was suspended for alcohol, tobacco or another substance instead of weed?


My opinion on the matter would still be the same...

[odin7]

To those concerned about smoking damaging your lungs:

http://magic-flight.com/


Pretty damn awesome little device there.

[cjay^]

I smoked weed heavily before exams and got an A- on my calc final exam.

yeah what