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View Full Version : Male Midwife - Ok, weird, or just plain wrong?



mastercool12
09-21-2011, 08:32 PM
Okay, well currently I'm upgrading all science pre-requisites and I'm strongly considering applying to the midwifery program at MRU in Calgary.

My first choices would be Diagnostic Imaging, particularly ultrasound, but getting into any diagnostic imaging program may prove itself to be difficult. I want to have other options, and respiratory therapy / nursing just isn't for me.

Midwifery is a relatively new profession, and all in all I can't imagine it being that bad. I may run into cases where the female wouldn't feel comfortable with a male midwife though, and I can imagine getting into some pretty awkward conversations with friends/family about this career choice as well...

I don't know. What do you guys think? Diagnostic Imaging would be my first choice at a school like SAIT, but if I don't get accepted there, I'm thinking maybe midwifery would be a legitimate choice. I obviously would need to do some job shadowing here and there though.

Weapon_R
09-21-2011, 09:25 PM
I can't think of a couple who would request a male midwife over a female, everything else equal.

dirtsniffer
09-21-2011, 09:27 PM
:thumbsdow

Tik-Tok
09-21-2011, 09:29 PM
Originally posted by Weapon_R
I can't think of a couple who would request a male midwife over a female, everything else equal.

Super domineering, sexist husband, who thinks all women are incompetent... you might get a job in boonies.

davidI
09-21-2011, 09:33 PM
Originally posted by dirtsniffer
:thumbsdow

.

Super_Geo
09-21-2011, 11:06 PM
That sounds like a lot of commitment... have you considered trying being a receptionist or a hair stylist first?

Fcuk
09-21-2011, 11:24 PM
If you like it, go for it.

however, the way most males would see it is that they are uncomfortable with their wives in your hands.

I don't think anyone is trying to put you down just telling you straight up its most likely not a good choice. Explore more, keep your options open.

abyss
09-21-2011, 11:28 PM
Originally posted by Weapon_R
I can't think of a couple who would request a male midwife over a female, everything else equal.

Well I agree with you on an emotional level I would choose a female first every time, however, based on the fact that there aren't even CLOSE to enough midwives to meet the demand in Canada right now, he'd have a pretty good run at getting more than enough clients due to current lack of choice. It's HARD to get in with the midwives here and they actually tell people "We absolutely pick and choose the patients we want."

Now that I've experienced the exceptional level of care a midwife provides over an OB (at least the OB I had initially anyway), I'd pick a male midwife over no midwife every time.

I do think it's odd though, because I have a male GP, had a male OB/GYN for my first pregnancy and I had no emotional response at all. I don't understand how a midwife would be different. Maybe because the care is so much more personal with a midwife?

On the female dominated forum I'm on there was actually a thread about this very thing, most of the women said they'd have no issue with it, but a few said that they wouldn't choose a male midwife purely based on an emotional reaction. Of those, most said they also wouldn't choose a male OB or doctor though.

OP - My vote would be go for it, based on what I've experienced, there will be no shortage of patients for you. However, It will be a lot of work to go so much against the grain though, finding a midwife group to take you on after graduating might be difficult until the bias on male midwives (and midwives in general) shift. Might be worth calling the groups in Calgary (or wherever you're wanting to work) to see what their thoughts on the program and potential male students would be, it wouldn't hurt to see what they think.

Type_S1
09-21-2011, 11:38 PM
def. don't think it is a good idea. Kind of like a male nurse or male masseuse... I don't want any of them purely based on emotional reactions and personal preference.

Jason Lange
09-22-2011, 12:22 AM
It's called a midwife, think about that. It will be like this for a while and be slow to change, maybe a similarity could be pulled from viewing the trades, sure there is women involved now but it took years and years to get here. Not saying it's bad or won't work, just (obviously) different.

davidI
09-22-2011, 12:40 AM
Don't you think women would rather work with someone who has ovaries and is capable of bearing a child themselves?

Not to question your sexuality or anything, but if you're into women, don't you think it will be tough to find a girlfriend who accepts this as your profession? I would think it would limit the playing field considerably....

bignerd
09-22-2011, 12:41 AM
Lots of male doctors out there, both family and Ob/Gyne so not sure why it would be anymore awkward than that. I would think it would be less awkward delivering a baby than it would be doing an endo-vaginal scan....

Pretty big difference between ultrasound and mid-wifery, one is more science and analytical where as the other is extremely hands on. There is also nuc med and the xray tech program at SAIT if you don't like the resp tech program.
They did take two guys into the ultrasound program this year though.

As well I once did a mortgage app for a guy who was a mid-wife in Nunavut, he made well over 100K a year on contract with the health region up there.

LongCity
09-22-2011, 12:58 AM
It's easy to make over 100k up in those areas though. Nurses make that much with housing expenses paid for and whatnot. It's cause no one really wants to be up there so the money has to be higher to attract.

CompletelyNumb
09-22-2011, 02:37 AM
http://img.release-lounge.com/images/ReleaseLoungeRG/mtprlrg.png

ExtraSlow
09-22-2011, 06:26 AM
In the end, most couples want a midwife they are comfortable with. Currently, for most people,that means a female.

But, given the demand for midwives, and the low number of them, you do have a shot at making this work.
Don't think about a male midwife vs a female midwife. It's most likely going to be a choice between a male midwife and no midwife at all.

Probably the best thing you could do is go out and talk to some currently practicing midwives. Ask them how a male midwife would work in their teams.

My wife and I had a team of midwives for the birth of our daughter, and yep, all of them were women.

Anyway, if this is your passion, go for it, but know it'll be an uphill struggle. If you are just looking at this as a career, don't bother, since you'll be fighting this stereotype your whole life.

03ozwhip
09-22-2011, 06:39 AM
Originally posted by Type_S1
def. don't think it is a good idea. Kind of like a male nurse or male masseuse... I don't want any of them purely based on emotional ERECTIONS and personal preference.

fixed :D

mastercool12
09-22-2011, 06:54 AM
When I mention Diagnostic Imaging, I mean either ultrasound, x-ray or nuc med. Getting into any of these programs would take immediate preference.

Still, I think the stereotype would be very hard to get over. I mentioned this career prospect to my mom and she freaked out. She said she would not want a man handling her baby and in her room during pregnancy and she would feel much more comfortable with a women.

kamakurakid
09-22-2011, 08:11 AM
Midwife means terrible working hours, no social life you can plan really. I know of two midwives and they are seriously in love with the work, such passion I have never seen in anyone else. From what you have written I feel you are looking at this as a far down the list of professions. You will hate it and the clients will pick up on this.

Can I get in on the movie rights if you go through with this? Seriously, I need to find a younger Adam Sandler type actor to play the lead role in Midwiff.

Mixalot27
09-22-2011, 08:30 AM
Originally posted by kamakurakid
Can I get in on the movie rights if you go through with this? Seriously, I need to find a younger Adam Sandler type actor to play the lead role in Midwiff.

Look no further, Freddie Prinze Jr. could use the job and has already played a male nanny:

OZhPcNzzrMA

D'z Nutz
09-22-2011, 08:57 AM
Wouldn't a male midwife == midhusband? Or if you wanna be politically correct, midperson :rofl:

mastercool12, go for it. You'll be a pioneer in this area if you're successful and tear down barriers for all males who have been passed over for jobs on account of their gender :thumbsup:

Guillermo
09-22-2011, 09:40 AM
personally, i would only feel comfortable with a flamingly-gay male midwife fondling my wife's genitalia. :dunno: if that's you, cool... but if you're some testosterone-filled brut who looks like he just walked off the set of American Loggers or Deadliest Catch, then you better loook for something else to do.

sputnik
09-22-2011, 10:42 AM
Probably not a good idea.

Just like women CEOs. Nobody wants them around.

davidI
09-22-2011, 10:57 AM
Originally posted by sputnik

Just like women CEOs. Nobody wants them around.

Full of win!

hurrdurr
09-22-2011, 11:01 AM
Originally posted by sputnik
Probably not a good idea.

Just like women CEOs. Nobody wants them around.

max_boost
09-22-2011, 11:19 AM
Originally posted by sputnik
Probably not a good idea.

Just like women CEOs. Nobody wants them around. HAHA

:werd: :rofl:

abyss
09-22-2011, 12:32 PM
Originally posted by bignerd
I would think it would be less awkward delivering a baby than it would be doing an endo-vaginal scan....


:werd:
Such a nice scientific name for the awful cooter cam.

Just to quell any myths, there's a surprising lack of vaginal fondling involved in most prenatal care (especially if you're low risk, which you have to be to have a midwife at all) My midwife hasn't even seen me without pants on and I deliver in 3 weeks.

Ultrasound techs, OB's and regular GP's (if they do PAP's) definitely see more vag than midwives do.

Kritafo
09-22-2011, 12:35 PM
I don think I ever choose a male midwife, I would want someone who has already had children of their own and understand what I need and what I am going through. Just as weird for the pregnant wife, too many husbands have a tough time right in a hospital setting. I insisted on a female Dr after my first section with an uncaring male Dr.

Cowtown_Raider
09-22-2011, 10:55 PM
Originally posted by kamakurakid
Midwife means terrible working hours, no social life you can plan really. I know of two midwives and they are seriously in love with the work, such passion I have never seen in anyone else. From what you have written I feel you are looking at this as a far down the list of professions. You will hate it and the clients will pick up on this.

Can I get in on the movie rights if you go through with this? Seriously, I need to find a younger Adam Sandler type actor to play the lead role in Midwiff.

This....pretty much nail on the head. If you don't have a serious passion for helping women cope with labour, seek another path. Midwives are pretty much on call 24/7. Clients can call them any hour of the day or night for whatever reason. Definitely do some more research...find a midwife who will explain everything they do. Better yet, find a mid-dude who can give you that extremely rare perspective. Good luck and certainly keep us posted :thumbsup:

Rat Fink
09-22-2011, 11:15 PM
.

clem24
09-26-2011, 11:31 AM
Here's the reason why it's hard to get in to see a midwife. Because it's now 100% provincially funded, many couples are choosing the midwife option, but without doing ANY kind of research into what midwives are all about. To many women, it's a novelty. To the midwives, it's a huge pain in the ass because patients have no idea what midwifery is all about and end up "fighting" with the midwives. This is why they pick and choose.

I know our midwife group actually expelled 1 or 2 patients because they were just too difficult to deal with i.e. they would not believe anything the midwife says, and instead rely on their doctor, the internet, etc... The truth is, midwifery is *not* for everyone.

Having said that, midwifery is wonderful. As Abyss pointed out, midwives hardly even touch you or see you down there (unless asked) because quite simply, they don't need to! Poking a finger in there really doesn't tell you much about anything.

They even give many options (like only 1 ultrasound which is best/preferred), whether you want to opt out of certain tests, etc.... Essentially, their motto is that birthing is a natural process, not a medical procedure. Instead of telling you exactly what to do, a midwife is there to inform and allow you to make an informed decision. The level of care and caretaker to patient connection is just second to none. Plus they are on call 24/7 to field your questions and concerns.

Here's an example of great care: we home birthed our kids. The ACTUAL midwife that delivered our kid will come and do the subsequent home visits to follow up on any issues, instead of just some random nurse. How much better does it get?

As for being a male midwife... It's worth a shot, but I would best talk to a midwife office on their take. I can see many women being uncomfortable around a male at time of delivery, but the good news is, during any delivery (either home or hospital) I believe 2 midwives will be present. Some women probably don't care, but I am sure a huge number of them see midwives because the profession is predominantly female - just exactly what they want. But then again midwives work in teams. So it just might work.

I say go for it. Good luck!

sputnik
09-26-2011, 11:43 AM
Originally posted by clem24
Here's the reason why it's hard to get in to see a midwife. Because it's now 100% provincially funded, many couples are choosing the midwife option, but without doing ANY kind of research into what midwives are all about. To many women, it's a novelty.

:werd:

To me it also seems like saying "my widwife" or "I have a great midwife" is more about status or being pretentious than anything.

shakalaka
09-26-2011, 11:51 AM
I don't know about women. If I was married, as a husband, I would never want my wife be around a male mid-wife, ob-gyn or a masseuse for that matter. lol

sputnik
09-26-2011, 01:22 PM
Originally posted by shakalaka
I don't know about women. As a husband, I would never want my wife be around a male mid-wife, ob-gyn or a masseuse for that matter. lol

Seriously?

Insecure much?

My son was delivered by a male doctor that was younger than me. Big deal.

SOAB
09-26-2011, 01:51 PM
shit, when my daughter was born, there was probably a dozen people in the room, half of which were men. at that point in time, i don't give a shit who's in the room, i just want the best people to take care of my family.

shakalaka
09-26-2011, 03:27 PM
Originally posted by sputnik


Seriously?

Insecure much?

My son was delivered by a male doctor that was younger than me. Big deal.

lol I was joking.

Although I prolly wouldn't be too happy about a guy masseuse though. Used to have this conversation with my ex all the time and I guess she understood. Even though she thought the guy's are better than girls cause of stronger hands or what not. I guess I've just seen too much porn with this kinda setting that I didn't like the idea of her getting a massage done by a guy. lol

ExtraSlow
09-26-2011, 03:43 PM
Kinda funny, but I much prefer a female masseuse for myself, and for her. Wonder what that says about me . . . .

shakalaka
09-26-2011, 03:52 PM
Haha, personally same. Although after saying no to the guy for her, I couldn't exactly say I want a girl. lol Although, she didn't care and was okay with it. I was like win-win. :D

...Shit like that and other amazing stuff about her makes me ridiculously miss her even after almost 3 months :cry:

mazdavirgin
09-26-2011, 04:14 PM
The difference here is that male Dr's are typically never in the room alone with naked/exposed women. Mostly because they don't want to have to deal with sexual harassment lawsuits. The second a male Dr has to do anything which could even remotely be misconstrued they bring in their female nurse...

Good luck dealing with stuff like this as a male midwife.

Skyline_Addict
09-26-2011, 04:22 PM
Originally posted by shakalaka

I guess I've just seen too much porn with this kinda setting that I didn't like the idea of her getting a massage done by a guy. lol

But your user title says...

"Pwned myself for checking out gay porn"

shakalaka
09-26-2011, 04:25 PM
That's one of Rage's dirty jokes. I'll get him back someday. lol

J-hop
09-26-2011, 05:35 PM
Originally posted by shakalaka


lol I was joking.

Although I prolly wouldn't be too happy about a guy masseuse though. Used to have this conversation with my ex all the time and I guess she understood. Even though she thought the guy's are better than girls cause of stronger hands or what not. I guess I've just seen too much porn with this kinda setting that I didn't like the idea of her getting a massage done by a guy. lol

Insecurity for sure :D . If there is anything ive learned from my younger years watching porn it's that shit like that doesn't happen in real life haha. Most masseuses are professionals that wouldn't risk something like that. Unless you're taking her to some hole in the wall rub n tug in the back room type joints. Not to mention that guy probably touches 20+ girls a week, what makes you think he is going to pick your gf out of a lineup???

Nothing wrong with a male midwife, my gfs gyn is a male and neither her nor I have an issue with that. Again is someone going to risk their license to practice over someone they barely know? I think not...

clem24
09-27-2011, 08:34 AM
Originally posted by mazdavirgin
The difference here is that male Dr's are typically never in the room alone with naked/exposed women. Mostly because they don't want to have to deal with sexual harassment lawsuits. The second a male Dr has to do anything which could even remotely be misconstrued they bring in their female nurse...

Good luck dealing with stuff like this as a male midwife.

Did you even read the thread?

a.) Abyss is 3 weeks away from her due date. She has not exposed any part below the belt yet.

b.) When you deliver, there are 2 midwives present. Chances of 2 males on the same team? *Extremely* unlikely.

c.) At the midwives' office, there are *lots* of midwives around. The second the midhusband has to look at his patient down there, I don't see how they can't grant the patient's request of having another female in the room.

So really, what's the problem? There's a lot of insecurity in this thread. I can totally understand as at one point, I felt the same way. But then I was young and really didn't know better. So really, just get over it.

Sure you'll hear cases about doctors abusing patients. But they are *extremely* rare. Maybe one case will surface every year at most. Think about that, considering how many doctors and patients there are in all of Canada.

As for male Ob/gyns, when your whole job is to look at pussies all day, you get bored. I read something once where an ob/gyn was asked just this question and the thing is, it's pretty fucking boring. What they really crave are totally whacked out/fucked up pussies because then that makes their job interesting. Really, there's just nothing sexual about it. It's their job and they are so focused on it (plus the fact that they can LOSE their jobs) that really they don't have time to admire things. And as pointed out, if they are looking at pussies all day long, what makes you think they'll single out your wife/gf?

Do this.. Look at porn/pussies for 10 hours a day, 5 days a week. Make sure you look at hot chicks, as well as really fat chicks, preggo chicks, fucked up chicks with fucked up pussies, and grandmas. Sooner or later, you'll get bored and probably repulsed. When something becomes a job, your perspective will change immediately.

Back on topic... I honestly don't think my wife would even have a problem with it, AS LONG AS THE MIDHUSBAND does a decent job.

pea_soup
10-04-2011, 10:07 AM
I don't see the different personally. Most women see males doctors when it comes to their special parts. I mean 85% chance they'd have a male doctor in the hospital deliver the baby. Does it make a difference if the person doing it at home is a male or female then?

Porsche_55
10-11-2011, 10:15 PM
Originally posted by mastercool12


Midwifery is a relatively new profession, and all in all I can't imagine it being that bad.

New profession? Newer than what, Sheriff, textile worker? This profession has been around since woman have had kids. Its actually a really popular job in Europe. If your looking to help people go with choice 2 and make some freaken $$$. Canada doesn't need another EI hopeful.

sputnik
10-13-2011, 05:36 AM
http://cdn.mothering.com/3/38/380d41b1_midhusbands.png
http://cdn.mothering.com/3/38/380d41b1_midhusbands.png