Going Full Straight Edge For All January!!

[tirebob]

This past covid year has been a right solid kick in the nuts for me health wise. While my working lifestyle has made some serious improvements, my physical health took a bit of a nosedive and I gained back a good 30 lbs of the weight I spent the last couple of years working to lose, and before it gets completely out of control, I decided that at the beginning of this year I wanted to challenge myself to go 100% straight edge for the entire month of January, and while I held back on posting just in case I failed miserably, 8 days in I am doing great!

As a nod to my punk rock roots and Ian Mackaye (if you know, you know) I ain't even jerking off! That part is totally unnecessary really (sex and straight edge is more about not fucking just to fuck outside of a relationship) but I want to see how much will power I have in me and if I come out on the other side feeling good or wanting to die. Yeah, I am that weird... lol! It may not sound like a big deal but I don't think I have gone an entire month without any form of booze, weed or wanking since I was 12.

I have gotten myself back on the IF too and am back to eating whole foods and avoiding processed as much as possible. Being 50 now I gotta get my head right and get myself back on track. I guess this is kind of a New Years resolution which is something I have never done, but I didn't even think of it as that. It just was coincidence that I came to this the night before my 24th wedding anniversary and I was thinking it would be pretty great to last quite a while longer for my bride and kids, and as we were married on New Years day, it is just how it all fell.

Anyhow, I thought I might post this and see if any of you out there are attacking your health in something of a similar way (minus the lack of pud pulling I am sure! :rofl:) and if so, how is it going for you?

Cheers!

[jwslam]

Came into thread thinking you straight-edge razor'ed your beard.

This is just as impressive :thumbsup:

[Darkane]

Came into thread thinking you straight-edge razor'ed your beard.

This is just as impressive :thumbsup:

Me too, then found a no fap post.

Let’s see what happens.

[vengie]

Came into thread thinking you straight-edge razor'ed your beard.

This is just as impressive :thumbsup:

Lol X2...

Wife and I are also going dry this month - 8 days in and I'd really enjoy a glass of Red! But overall its been good.

We are also reducing our red meat intake down to 1x/ week, supplementing with fish/ full vegetarian options.

Workout 3x/week - Cardio (bike, outdoor hockey) 2x/week and an active recovery day.

[civic_stylez]

December was very hard for me and I spent a lot of time drinking/partying. As someone who was used to 8-10 hours of sleep and then going to no sleep/3-4 hours a night, it kicked my ass. Left in a terrible emotional and physical spot, I took the clean January pledge as well. Eating and sleeping well even for the first week has been huge. Started meditating and making time for myself. The cell phone was another one to take a break from. Social media was something to do and now what Ive cut back from it, I dont miss it. January was more of a realization that a resolution. As I get older, its amazing how polluting your body and lack of care really affects all aspects of my life. The mental aspect was really crazy.. no sleep just clouds the mind and leaves you feeling like complete trash. Negative thoughts and zero motivation to do anything. I do love my whisky but going forward I want to enjoy to drink, not drink to enjoy.

Good on ya Bob.. hope you see it through with great results!

[ExtraSlow]

I am not doing a clean janauary, but I support those who do. Can be nice to have a reset.

[Tik-Tok]

I am not doing a clean janauary, but I support those who do. Can be nice to have a reset.

You damn socialists and your great reset!


Came into thread thinking you straight-edge razor'ed your beard.

This is just as impressive :thumbsup:

He shaved it last year.

[tirebob]

December was very hard for me and I spent a lot of time drinking/partying. As someone who was used to 8-10 hours of sleep and then going to no sleep/3-4 hours a night, it kicked my ass. Left in a terrible emotional and physical spot, I took the clean January pledge as well. Eating and sleeping well even for the first week has been huge. Started meditating and making time for myself. The cell phone was another one to take a break from. Social media was something to do and now what Ive cut back from it, I dont miss it. January was more of a realization that a resolution. As I get older, its amazing how polluting your body and lack of care really affects all aspects of my life. The mental aspect was really crazy.. no sleep just clouds the mind and leaves you feeling like complete trash. Negative thoughts and zero motivation to do anything. I do love my whisky but going forward I want to enjoy to drink, not drink to enjoy.

Good on ya Bob.. hope you see it through with great results!

Fuck yeah man... 100%! The sleep thing and recognizing the boredom drinking definitely were my two biggest prompts to get right again. Good on you too!

[Chester]

I don't think I could do it, I'm weak.

Good luck to you, sir.

[vengie]

. As I get older, its amazing how polluting your body and lack of care really affects all aspects of my life. The mental aspect was really crazy.. no sleep just clouds the mind and leaves you feeling like complete trash. Negative thoughts and zero motivation to do anything. I do love my whisky but going forward I want to enjoy to drink, not drink to enjoy.


This right here was my trigger as well.
Covid has been a massive kick in the nuts, and this past year has been very difficult professionally, as a business owner, new father and a husband.
I found myself getting more and more negative, pessimistic etc. It was a crazy spiral!

Meditation, fitness, mindfulness and gratitude are my top priorities (aside from family) in 2021.

"Control the controllables"

Good luck to you all! love hearing the stories.

[max_boost]

Yes you can do it because you have the motivation to and more importantly your why.

[nzwasp]

This past covid year has been a right solid kick in the nuts for me health wise. While my working lifestyle has made some serious improvements, my physical health took a bit of a nosedive and I gained back a good 30 lbs of the weight I spent the last couple of years working to lose, and before it gets completely out of control, I decided that at the beginning of this year I wanted to challenge myself to go 100% straight edge for the entire month of January, and while I held back on posting just in case I failed miserably, 8 days in I am doing great!

As a nod to my punk rock roots and Ian Mackaye (if you know, you know) I ain't even jerking off! That part is totally unnecessary really (sex and straight edge is more about not fucking just to fuck outside of a relationship) but I want to see how much will power I have in me and if I come out on the other side feeling good or wanting to die. Yeah, I am that weird... lol! It may not sound like a big deal but I don't think I have gone an entire month without any form of booze, weed or wanking since I was 12.

I have gotten myself back on the IF too and am back to eating whole foods and avoiding processed as much as possible. Being 50 now I gotta get my head right and get myself back on track. I guess this is kind of a New Years resolution which is something I have never done, but I didn't even think of it as that. It just was coincidence that I came to this the night before my 24th wedding anniversary and I was thinking it would be pretty great to last quite a while longer for my bride and kids, and as we were married on New Years day, it is just how it all fell.

Anyhow, I thought I might post this and see if any of you out there are attacking your health in something of a similar way (minus the lack of pud pulling I am sure! :rofl:) and if so, how is it going for you?

Cheers!

Out of drinking, weed and wanking I would think no wanking would be the hardest. Probably no porn and then trying to restrict the wanking to once per week or something would be a lot easier. I think boredom also drives the wanking as well as drinking, and to me any combination of too much weed and drinking leads to wanking...

[ThePenIsMightier]

It causes death, you know. :nut:

0Y5yt2iOKn0

[max_boost]

It's all possible lol

I've completely cut off drinking unless I'm with the guys or on a date so haven't had a sip for at least 10 months now.

Did a no fap thing for 2 months a few years back and as a result don't watch porn anymore either.

Weed was tricky cuz I was using it for sleep but now transitioned to a 30:1 cbd to thc ratio and only taking 1ml so can't even feel the high anymore and I don't always take it.

Not sure if it's the overdoing of things that leads me to go the other way and cut it close to cold turkey or what. The party days are a distant memory now. I get buzz off half a beer and my brain feels fried so I don't even wanna get high lol

[killramos]

I’m still trying to wrap my head around calling this “full straight edge”.

Is it because you are heterosexual and being edgy?

[ExtraSlow]

the naming is confusing.

[bulaian]

Congrats on taking the steps to more positive life choices.

I also found myself drinking much more in 2020 due to boredom, until Gout started to flare up again and didn't seem to go away as quickly as it has in previous years. I have been without alcohol for over and month now and am feeling better. Haven't had too much urge to jump back into it yet. Maybe I'll stick it out to the end of January with you :thumbsup:

[firebane]

I’m still trying to wrap my head around calling this “full straight edge”.

Is it because you are heterosexual and being edgy?

I've heard of straight shooter but straight edge is definitely a new one.

[ThePenIsMightier]

I've heard of straight shooter but straight edge is definitely a new one.

Can't have upper management written all over you if you keep tossing off in the stalls at work.

[killramos]

Can't have upper management written all over you if you keep tossing off in the stalls at work.

We can’t all be stock brokers.

[JRSC00LUDE]

I’m still trying to wrap my head around calling this “full straight edge”.

Is it because you are heterosexual and being edgy?

Have you never heard the term straight edge? Amazing.

[killramos]

Have you never heard the term straight edge? Amazing.

Not in the context of a diet lol

[JRSC00LUDE]

Not in the context of a diet lol

Well the no booze is diet related!

[tirebob]

I’m still trying to wrap my head around calling this “full straight edge”.

Is it because you are heterosexual and being edgy?

Straight Edge is an philosophy/ideology/movement that was started (or at least was coined) back in the early 80's by Ian Mackaye of the DC Punk band Minor Threat...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ian_MacKaye

As for "full straight edge", the idea morphed into less observant versions with people who adapted it to be only no booze and drugs but sex was fine, just even no booze or hard drugs but weed was fine etc... Basically like religion where people choose the rules based on their own desires, it got bastardized.

And yes... Hetro and edgy. Well maybe not soooo edgy but I like to pretend to be!


Well the no booze is diet related!

So is the no weed in reality. Burning leads to snacking so there's that aspect haha! Yeah at first my plan was more about forcing myself into self control but the IF dietary part was added shortly after...

Really the no frivolous sex part outside of a relationship is of no consequence as I am happily married over 24 years now and we still enjoy banging the gong regular, so in the spirit of trying to be as disciplined as possible, I added the no fapping policy. We can still get busy though and not be outside the mantra.

[JRSC00LUDE]

Straight Edge is an philosophy/ideology/movement that was started (or at least was coined) back in the early 80's by Ian Mackaye of the DC Punk band Minor Threat...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ian_MacKaye



So is the no weed in reality. Burning leads to snacking so there's that aspect haha! Yeah at first my plan was more about forcing myself into self control but the IF dietary part was added shortly after...

Really the no frivolous sex part outside of a relationship is of no consequence as I am happily married over 24 years now and we still enjoy banging the gong regular, so in the spirit of trying to be as disciplined as possible, I added the no fapping policy. We can still get busy though and not be outside the mantra.

I don't like to creep too often but for anyone who wonders, this is Bob in '84

96677

[gretz]

I’ll take up the slack and drink / masturbate for all those who are stemming away from it <cracks knuckles>

[ExtraSlow]

Have you never heard the term straight edge? Amazing.

I have never heard that term in this context. I am amazing.

[Tik-Tok]

Have you never heard the term straight edge? Amazing.

Seriously, this is rather surprising me. I assumed everyone knew the term.

[killramos]

I have never heard that term in this context. I am amazing.

Such amaze

[BerserkerCatSplat]

Seriously, this is rather surprising me. I assumed everyone knew the term.

Yeah same, I thought it was a fairly well-known thing.

At any rate, good on you Bob for doing what's best for you!

[Tik-Tok]

I don't like to creep too often but for anyone who wonders, this is Bob in '84

[

This is Bob and Mrs.Bob in '98

96678

[ExtraSlow]

I've also never hear of that Ian person or his band. So maybe I'm the wrong demographic. I was listening to Phil Collins in the 1980's, same as now.

The idea of abstaining from behaviors you know are harmful I understand, and I can support. Lots of people who have struggled with addiction or just grown dependent on substances do this. I've heard of that.

[riander5]

I'd never heard of it either. Sounds like a term the older guys are familiar with.

How often do all they guys in here with wives jerk off? Christ! :rofl:

[firebane]

I'd never heard of it either. Sounds like a term the older guys are familiar with.

How often do all they guys in here with wives jerk off? Christ! :rofl:

I'm 43 years old and never heard of it.. But I grew up in a lot of secluded small farm towns as a kid :D

[BerserkerCatSplat]

I imagine that if you didn't hang out with the punk crowd much it's less likely you would have heard the term.

[never]

tirebob later today...


https://youtu.be/BwH__x6jV6A

But seriously, good luck on staying back on track with the diet.

[nzwasp]

How often do all they guys in here with wives jerk off? Christ! :rofl:

You are under the belief that married women love fucking, not the case in my experience nor any of my friends experiences. Atleast not at the regular rate of dating life.

[tirebob]

This is Bob and Mrs.Bob in '98

96678

Haha! Actually by this point in my life I was trying to be a productive member of society...

Not 98 but only one year earlier... January 01/1997

96680

- - - Updated - - -


tirebob later today...


https://youtu.be/BwH__x6jV6A



To much rep given already, but well worthy! :thumbsup:

[beyond_ban]

Good work Bob, and best of luck to you on your journey!

I have never drank more than i did in 2020, and that was capped off with a trip to Mexico in December and the drink heavy holiday season. I too have set a goal to stay dry through February and focus on mental and physical health, it is amazing what our bodies can accomplish when we completely sell out to goals we set for ourselves.

[never]

You are under the belief that married women love fucking, not the case in my experience nor any of my friends experiences. Atleast not at the regular rate of dating life.

You and your friends are picking the wrong women!

[tirebob]

You are under the belief that married women love fucking, not the case in my experience nor any of my friends experiences. Atleast not at the regular rate of dating life.

I can't pretend after 24 years of marriage we are given'er every chance we get anymore, but my lady never walks away from some action any time my back is in good enough shape to go!

[nzwasp]

I can't pretend after 24 years of marriage we are given'er every chance we get anymore, but my lady never walks away from some action any time my back is in good enough shape to go!

I only have experience with asian women. My white friends (with non asian wives) seem to be getting it more regularly, mine has a medical issue so thats more the reason but I hear from her friends that they cant be bothered, dont find it satisfying, feel touched out etc etc.

[ExtraSlow]

Bigger problem when you have infants and toddlers too. aside from just finding time and energy, being "Touched out" is a real thing. Kids get older, that side of things can improve.

[tirebob]

Bigger problem when you have infants and toddlers too. aside from just finding time and energy, being "Touched out" is a real thing. Kids get older, that side of things can improve.Can confirm... Especially once the kids leave and you are empty nesting. Being able to drop trou in the middle of the day in the hallway/livingroom/kitchen/deck/office or wherever the moment strikes and not worry about kids storming in is quite liberating and conducive to getting more action.

Also, having a wife who's uterus has been ganked out doesn't hurt either. Having no fear of a random pregnancy also leads to more sex.

Best advice I can give is get outside your regular method bubble and be playful. You don't have to go full freaky-deaky by any means, but experimentation now and again can definitely bring back the spark!

[riander5]

Dont get me wrong I'm not saying it's normal to be plowing the old lady daily after 20 years of marriage haha. The whole no-fap thing just seemed targeted to incels though. One things forsure, not wanking it to porn if not physically is probably one of the better things you can do for all other aspects of life.

Hope everyone doing this has good success!

- - - Updated - - -


I only have experience with asian women. My white friends (with non asian wives) seem to be getting it more regularly, mine has a medical issue so thats more the reason but I hear from her friends that they cant be bothered, dont find it satisfying, feel touched out etc etc.

I thought the asians were the freaks? Have us white folk been lied to all these years?

[max_boost]

Never heard of Straight Edge before other than the good work of Straight Edge Painting owned by a Beyonder

[tirebob]

Never heard of Straight Edge before other than the good work of Straight Edge Painting owned by a Beyonder

Definitely not the same I would say... Haha!

[sabad66]

I don’t get the reason for limiting wanking. Is it to control porn addictions?

Personally I think porn/wanking is a good thing. Without it, I’m certain there would be a lot more cheating in this world.

[BerserkerCatSplat]

Never heard of Straight Edge before other than the good work of Straight Edge Painting owned by a Beyonder

I don't know about you, but for me it's definitely a bonus that the painter is committed to not getting shitfaced and jerking off in my house.

[tirebob]

I don’t get the reason for limiting wanking. Is it to control porn addictions?

Personally I think porn/wanking is a good thing. Without it, I’m certain there would be a lot more cheating in this world.
sabad66 Straight edge isn't about limited wanking... Straight Edge philosophy is about not having sex as conquest (essentially just not sex outside of love or a relationship). I have not stopped having sex because I am in a seriously committed 24 year relationship with my wife. The no wanking is just something I am challenging myself with strictly as a self discipline thing for this one month just to show myself I am in control of my shit and that my shit isn't in control of me and just to half jokingly keep it in the spirit of straight edge.

[vengie]

I would like to formally request a masturbation sub forum.


Also
https://www.menshealth.com/sex-women/a19534050/5-reasons-you-should-masturbate-tonight/

[tirebob]

I would like to formally request a masturbation sub forum.



Comparing techniques and the like?? Probably would be a hit!

[Masked Bandit]

You and your friends are picking the wrong women!

This.

[tirebob]

This.

Or maybe just lacking in the skillzzzzzz to keep the ladies coming back for more! :rofl:

[ExtraSlow]

Or maybe just lacking in the skillzzzzzz to keep the ladies coming back for more! :rofl:

Agree.
96711

[tirebob]

Agree.
96711

2 pump dump! Or they don’t go down... No man gonna stay in the action if he don’t like eating the pussy!

[ExtraSlow]

I'm a hungry man and I don't want pizza.
96712

[nzwasp]

2 pump dump! Or they don’t go down... No man gonna stay in the action if he don’t like eating the pussy!

I love it, wife thinks its gross though. But as I said the reason my life isnt as spicy as some on here is more medical reasons.

[ExtraSlow]

Medical issues after childbirth / breastfeeding are actually quite common. Can interfere for sure.

Other medical issues outside of that as well.

[tirebob]

I love it, wife thinks its gross though. But as I said the reason my life isnt as spicy as some on here is more medical reasons.Apologies if you thought was directed at you! I was just going off on a tangent inspired by extraslow haha!

[BerserkerCatSplat]

I would like to formally request a masturbation sub forum.



Y'all motherfuckers acting like Ask Leo doesn't exist.

[ExtraSlow]

I was just going off on a tangent inspired by extraslow haha! This is the way.

[flipstah]

Y'all motherfuckers acting like Ask Leo doesn't exist.

Straight Edge ≠ Straight Edging

KAgUfDIFIQ4

[tirebob]

Straight Edge ≠ Straight Edging

KAgUfDIFIQ4

Bah! He still be fapping...

96718

[tirebob]

Halfway through the month boys, and still holding on strong!

I am feeling great actually and am down 6 lbs as well as a great side effect I didn't necessarily anticipate, I am back to sleeping a solid 6-7 hours a night no problem!

[ExtraSlow]

I am feeling great actually So happy to hear this.

[spike98]

Halfway through the month boys, and still holding on strong!

I am feeling great actually and am down 6 lbs as well as a great side effect I didn't necessarily anticipate, I am back to sleeping a solid 6-7 hours a night no problem!

Im dieting and IF as well. Haven't drank or MJ since the 1st also but mostly because i'd rather eat my calories than drink them and MJ well, that leads to late night skip the dishes. Down 8lbs myself.

The lbs will slow down no doubt, but my goal is down 30 by April 1.

I still beat off like that shit owes me money though :D:D

[tirebob]

I still beat off like that shit owes me money though :D:DNot gonna lie... Abstaining from the fap is the hardest aspect of this entire thing! lol!

[ExtraSlow]

Not gonna lie... Abstaining from the fap is the hardest aspect of this entire thing! lol!

your wife is going to need a vacation in February.

[tirebob]

your wife is going to need a vacation in February.Whadaya mean February?

https://i.imgflip.com/2amp6v.jpg

[ExtraSlow]

I mean you aren't going to let her take a break until Feb.

[spike98]

Not gonna lie... Abstaining from the fap is the hardest aspect of this entire thing! lol!

I don’t doubt that. Doc put me on TRT so the drive is menacing. The wife can’t go more than once a day so it’s up to me. Haha.

[max_boost]

Not gonna lie... Abstaining from the fap is the hardest aspect of this entire thing! lol!

When George abstained in Seinfeld he became a genius. Hang in there bob and you’ll unlock that potential too!! Haha

[Tik-Tok]

When George abstained in Seinfeld he became a genius. Hang in there bob and you’ll unlock that potential too!! Haha

George was abstaining from sex too though.

[flipstah]

George was abstaining from sex too though.
tirebob is more Elaine than George

[Darkane]

I don’t doubt that. Doc put me on TRT so the drive is menacing. The wife can’t go more than once a day so it’s up to me. Haha.

Once a day? That’s uncharted territory for women as it is!

Lol. Sounds like TRT is working well, I think in general men will be in replacement a lot in the future. It’s losing its stigma.

[tirebob]

tirebob is more Elaine than George flipstah You kinda know me too well!

[nzwasp]

I don’t doubt that. Doc put me on TRT so the drive is menacing. The wife can’t go more than once a day so it’s up to me. Haha.

Ive been on TRT for 5 years now. I presume you self inject? I had a friend go on TRT for awhile and he couldnt muster up the ability to self inject so he went to his doctor every week - which to me sounds like a major pain in the arse. Injecting into your thighs you cant even feel the needle going in.

[spike98]

Once a day? That’s uncharted territory for women as it is!

Lol. Sounds like TRT is working well, I think in general men will be in replacement a lot in the future. It’s losing its stigma.

Diet, exercise, preservatives, pollution, the list goes on. My doc told me that he believes the majority of the male population these days has low (not ideal) T. It’s been a real life changer for myself.


Ive been on TRT for 5 years now. I presume you self inject? I had a friend go on TRT for awhile and he couldnt muster up the ability to self inject so he went to his doctor every week - which to me sounds like a major pain in the arse. Injecting into your thighs you cant even feel the needle going in.

I’m every three days, myself. Alternating thighs. Easy peasy. It’s routine now for me.

[schurchill39]

Add me to the list of people who have never heard the term Straight Edge before. You ol'boys are wild.

I once did 8 months without feeding the ducks due to some health issues but when I finally badgered the witness again it was extremely cathartic. I can see the desire to cut out shaking hands with the milkman strictly to see if you can, but after having been there I can confirm that it would take a stronger man than I to turn down a boxing match with the one-eyed champ ever again. Good on you Bob.

Personally I'd like to muster the will power to give up (or at least dial back) social media.

[ThePenIsMightier]

Add me to the list of people who have never heard the term Straight Edge before. You ol'boys are wild.

I once did 8 months without feeding the ducks due to some health issues but when I finally badgered the witness again it was extremely cathartic. I can see the desire to cut out shaking hands with the milkman strictly to see if you can, but after having been there I can confirm that it would take a stronger man than I to turn down a boxing match with the one-eyed champ ever again. Good on you Bob.

Personally I'd like to muster the will power to give up (or at least dial back) social media.

Are you referring to cuffing the gopher, or distributing some literature? Yanking your doodle dandy, or a Lonely Dutch Rudder?

[nzwasp]

Diet, exercise, preservatives, pollution, the list goes on. My doc told me that he believes the majority of the male population these days has low (not ideal) T. It’s been a real life changer for myself.



I’m every three days, myself. Alternating thighs. Easy peasy. It’s routine now for me.

3 days jeez - Im once every two weeks. The main things I noticed inregards to working out especially was that I used to get DOM's for 2 weeks after one workout (before TRT), now I get it for a day or so. One thing I miss before I started TRT was having hair, since starting ive amassed a carpet on my chest or back (never was able to grow any fur here) and also lost all of my hair on my head. Also now can grow a beard where as pre trt it took weeks for any facial hair to grow.

[spike98]

3 days jeez - Im once every two weeks. The main things I noticed inregards to working out especially was that I used to get DOM's for 2 weeks after one workout (before TRT), now I get it for a day or so. One thing I miss before I started TRT was having hair, since starting ive amassed a carpet on my chest or back (never was able to grow any fur here) and also lost all of my hair on my head. Also now can grow a beard where as pre trt it took weeks for any facial hair to grow.

I initially had high BF percentage so I had a hard time controlling my estrogen. I was weekly 100mg/week and my doc spread it out to 40mg every 3 days. Makes me feel much more stable and the E sides subsided. Now I feel amazing every day instead of just a few days after my shot. More stable T would have helps with the DHT which causes the balding. You can take DHT blockers but you libido will suffer. Best to just shave and get jacked.

[ThePenIsMightier]

I vote for a testosterone replacement therapy (TRT) thread split.

[spike98]

I vote for a testosterone replacement therapy (TRT) thread split.

Id be down to share my experiences. It’s definitely worth it’s own thread.

[nzwasp]

There is already a TRT thread here: https://forums.beyond.ca/threads/374124-Testosterone-Replacement-Therapy
spike98

[The_Penguin]

I'd never heard of it either. Sounds like a term the older guys are familiar with.

How often do all they guys in here with wives jerk off? Christ! :rofl:

Daily. Why?

[nzwasp]

Daily. Why?

Maybe he thinks once you have a wife can satisfy you sexually whenever you are in the mood (some more submissive wives might do this, I have some religious friends who also seem to think this is the way). Takes two to be in the mood and whilst many guys on this board seem to have partners in sync I don’t think it’s the case for many others incl myself.

[tirebob]

Maybe he thinks once you have a wife can satisfy you sexually whenever you are in the mood (some more submissive wives might do this, I have some religious friends who also seem to think this is the way). Takes two to be in the mood and whilst many guys on this board seem to have partners in sync I don’t think it’s the case for many others incl myself.This is correct for sure... One thing I can say after over 24 years with the same partner, there definitely is an ebb and flow to the relationship in bed. So many stresses and things affect frequency over time, and there are periods where you go a long time not interested in sex, but at the same time it can come raging back when you are not expecting it. It can create a lot of stress on a relationship when one partner is not feeling it and the other is too, and those feelings can compound the problem even when it is nothing to do with your not loving your partner.

I think the very best thing any couple can do is to talk about it and get it all out on the table. It may not fix it right there and then but if you both know what is going on in each others heads then there is a lot less chance of animosity which is a killer to any relationship. The fact is there are many long term couples in low sex situations who are still extremely happy and satisfied while there are other couples that still go at it almost daily and both are normal situations. I think the worst thing is having expectations that are unreasonable for ones own individual relationships or basing your own relationship off of the ones your buddies have with their partners.

[nzwasp]

This is correct for sure... One thing I can say after over 24 years with the same partner, there definitely is an ebb and flow to the relationship in bed. So many stresses and things affect frequency over time, and there are periods where you go a long time not interested in sex, but at the same time it can come raging back when you are not expecting it. It can create a lot of stress on a relationship when one partner is not feeling it and the other is too, and those feelings can compound the problem even when it is nothing to do with your not loving your partner.

I think the very best thing any couple can do is to talk about it and get it all out on the table. It may not fix it right there and then but if you both know what is going on in each others heads then there is a lot less chance of animosity which is a killer to any relationship. The fact is there are many long term couples in low sex situations who are still extremely happy and satisfied while there are other couples that still go at it almost daily and both are normal situations. I think the worst thing is having expectations that are unreasonable for ones own individual relationships or basing your own relationship off of the ones your buddies have with their partners.

That is right, and my thoughts about it are I don't expect my wife to fulfill all my sexual needs if she's not feeling up to it. I don't pressure her or anything like that (I know that this is definitely a situation many women prob do face as I said above) and I don't think she should feel the need to have sex with me just to keep me happy in the relationship. Our situation is a little bit different than men or women who simply refuse to have sex at all (reddit.com/r/deadbedrooms). My wife has a debilitating condition in that sense which has no current cure (save from some experimental stem cell type treatment in the USA that cost 80K USD right now). I think the worst thing for me is I am jealous of other couples I know or meet that they have more sex than I do and that's one thing I hope to improve this year because Im sure its very irrational thinking.

[killramos]

I think this thread can be renamed to: “Just old people things”

[nzwasp]

I think this thread can be renamed to: “Just old people things”

Im 40 now and I dont think of myself as that old. However I remember going to my dad's 40th when I was 15 and I thought he was ancient.

[max_boost]

Im 40 now and I dont think of myself as that old. However I remember going to my dad's 40th when I was 15 and I thought he was ancient.

lol so true. I'm turning 40 this year. 20 seems like yesterday tbh.

When my dad was 40, I was already 20. I can't even imagine being a dad to a 19 year old right now. :eek: :eek:

[Disoblige]

lol so true. I'm turning 40 this year. 20 seems like yesterday tbh.

When my dad was 40, I was already 20. I can't even imagine being a dad to a 19 year old right now. :eek: :eek:

That is a mind twist for sure. That is one thing I envy about those who have kids early. It does pay off later, but at what cost?

From age 20-30 for those with kids, I do not envy that at all. I feel like everyone I know who had kids from 18-22 just ended up getting fat, drinking a lot at parties/get-togethers and not do much because they're so busy with the kid(s).

[riander5]

I think this thread can be renamed to: “Just old people things”

:rofl:

[tirebob]

That is a mind twist for sure. That is one thing I envy about those who have kids early. It does pay off later, but at what cost?

From age 20-30 for those with kids, I do not envy that at all. I feel like everyone I know who had kids from 18-22 just ended up getting fat, drinking a lot at parties/get-togethers and not do much because they're so busy with the kid(s).We did tons of stuff. What kind of stuff are you talking about that is something you can't do by having kids early?

[Disoblige]

We did tons of stuff. What kind of stuff are you talking about that is something you can't do by having kids early?
I'm not saying those who had kids early CAN'T do stuff, but those who I know that did, ended up being pre-occupied/lazy and not do much stuff.
But when I say stuff, I mean go on trips without the kiddo, do more adventurous things and not using having a kid as a reason not to (riding motorcycles, bungee jumping, etc.), traveling for an extensive period of time, even going out for dinner locally on a regular basis, enjoying the lifestyle of a DINK.

Don't hit me :(

[ExtraSlow]

Lots of people have kids early and still live that same life. I know a few. Not me, my social life ended, but people do it.

[tirebob]

I'm not saying those who had kids early CAN'T do stuff, but those who I know that did, ended up being pre-occupied/lazy and not do much stuff.
But when I say stuff, I mean go on trips without the kiddo, do more adventurous things and not using having a kid as a reason not to (riding motorcycles, bungee jumping, etc.), traveling for an extensive period of time, even going out for dinner locally on a regular basis, enjoying the lifestyle of a DINK.

Don't hit me :(Haha! No not at all man... That said, we still did all that stuff but maybe reeled in a bit for sure. The thing is, when you have kids and enjoy being a parent, you would rather do shit with them as a family even if it is less dink'ish' and you really don't care so it isn't like you feel you're losing out on stuff and, and in fact you feel like you are getting to do things that are so amazing your single friends just don't understand! lol! I am not saying it is like that for everyone of course, but when you get it, you get it.

Besides, I will say I am super happy and grateful that in our 40's we were empty nesting and now actually can still enjoy our time as adults who are old enough to appreciate stuff that is actually important to us and young enough to keep going for a long time to come.

That said, I have zero issue with dinks and have no issue with people who simply don't want kids. Who the fuck is anyone to tell someone else how to live their lives, right?

[legendboy]

Bob, props for trying straight edge out. Definitely a healthier lifestyle. I don't have the will power to go completely straight edge or the will or want too