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Xtrema
05-26-2005, 02:58 PM
Donation
The United Way realized that it had never received a donation from the city's most successful lawyer. So a United Way volunteer paid the lawyer a visit in his lavish office.

The volunteer opened the meeting by saying, "Our research shows that even though your annual income is over two million dollars, you don't give a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give something back to your community through the United Way?"

The lawyer thinks for a minute and says, "First, did your research also show you that my mother is dying after a long, painful illness and she has huge medical bills that are far beyond her ability to pay?"

Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbles, "Uh... no, I didn't know that."

"Secondly," says the lawyer, "my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair and is unable to support his wife and six children."

The stricken United Way rep begins to stammer an apology, but is cut off again.

"Thirdly, did your research also show you that my sister's husband died in a dreadful car accident, leaving her penniless with a mortgage and three children one of whom is disabled and another has learning disabilities requiring an array of private tutors?"

The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten, says, "I'm sorry, I had no idea"

And the lawyer says, "So... if I didn't give any money to them, what in hell makes you think I'd ever give any to you?"






> Man driving down road ....
>
> Woman driving up same road ...
>
> They pass each other ....
>
> The woman yells out the window, PIG!
>
> Man yells out window, B 1 T C H!
>
> Man rounds next curve. Crashes into a HUGE PIG in middle of road, and
dies.
>
> Thought For The Day: If only men would listen....

euro tang
05-26-2005, 03:18 PM
That first one is harsh, but still funny.