Fuck is this ever true, i'm still amazed at how big of shits my 2.5yr old takes. Me and my wife were dying at first, could not believe it.
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Both of you are confusing the generalized "home birth" term with "unassisted home birth". For low risk pregnancies under midwife care then its just as safe to have the baby at home or the hospital especially when you consider risks of travelling (which I acknowledge is super super low) and what you're exposed to in a hospital. That's whats cool about modern medicine is that people have the informed choice of what they want to do with well understood risks. In this case, one of those choices is where you want to give birth. If your missus is a medium or high risk pregnancy then you are absolutely right, the hospital is 100% where you should be having that baby because the chances of things going south with serious intervention required are very high.
Another thing to remember is that a midwife is a specialized formerly educated nurse who can order tests, write scripts, and have hospital admitting privilege's much like nurse practitioners. They take over as primary care provider for the whole pregnancy and up to 6 weeks after baby is born and they have the same equipment you'd find in any small town hospital like Camrose that don't have trauma centers. Midwives are not to be confused with doulas who are women with an online course, hairy armpits and a soothing voice.
I know Buster thinks this because he fears anything he doesn't understand and is a miserable human being as a baseline, but I will give BJStare the benefit of the doubt and assume he's referring to the truly granola people who don't believe in any form of modern medicine and think apple cider vinegar cures cancer. In those cases then yea they are dummies.
Our midwife supported pregnancy was leaps and bounds better than our primary physician one
If we hadn't been having twins, wife was going to go for a home birth with the midwife, birthing pool, the lot
All good points, but I got to see my wife splooge the contents of her uterus all over her hot doctor.
lol
On the next episode. People who let dogs give birth in their homes.
I like the idea of home birth and not dealing with all the hospital shit and being more comfortable in my own environment etc and if you knew there would be no problems I would prefer to not have to go into a hospital. Now with that said, when my daughter was born she was absolutely low risk and it turned problematic right at the very end end and I am super glad we were in a hospital and had access to their equipment in the moment that would have not been there if we were at home, so if it were to ever happen again (baby would need to be Jesus at this point) I would push for hospital for sure.
Honey!!! Get the tarp ready... the baby's coming now!!!
I can't....
The trick is to use a midwife at hospital. They reserve rooms for midwives and if things go south, there are doctors available. You get the same midwife through the whole process down to delivery, and you go home with the baby right away if everything checks out. Our 3rd, we called midwife when it was time, she beat us there had room and everything ready, we didn’t spend more than 3 hours at the hospital. Our second was the same, except labor lasted longer so we spent 5 hrs at hospital. Really, no cons. It’s like Disney vip service in comparison.
There really does need to be more education on midwives. They're great!
Oh yeah that would be way better. The worst part was having to spend the night hahaha! Well with our daughter she had to be there a few extra days too. Our son we were ready to book out after the first 10 minutes.
The idea of a midwife is great though. This one nurse we had my wife was ready to choke her out she was so fucking annoying.
@schurchill39 the quote above bolsters my point. I wasn't using the extreme example of unassisted granola eating hippies, I was talking about adverse outcomes that can even occur with the typical low risk pregnancy, and the ability to mitigate the impact of those situations. If something really really gnarly happens, I'd rather be already at the hospital, and not an ambulance ride away. It's that simple.
edit: I'm not anti-midwife at all. Or doula, or shaman, or whoever the fuck the mother wants holding her placenta after the baby crawls out. I'm just pro-modern medicine.
I also think some people are assuming it's just a choice the mom makes. If you have a midwife in Alberta, you are only given the option of a home birth if you are the lowest of low risk categories.
The "what if" crowd are being guided by feelings and not statistics, and I get it, childbirth and parenthood is a pretty emotional topic.
How are you home birth people dealing with the crime scene disaster after plus the PTSD of the scene?!
House would be on Kijiji for free faster than 89coupe could say "Builder Grade".
I have PTSD from so many things it's hard to keep track.
I did use a burner email and sent it to a friend. I only did this once. But I guess there is no shame in being an Asian and abuse this hack. Haha
I’ve heard good and bad things about midwife. My coworker absolutely hated her midwife because she kept insisting on to not use epidural. While a friend had similar experience as you. The midwife was there all ready to go before he even left the house.
We will bring up the option of midwife at our doctor appointment.
Don’t you discuss epidural beforehand? Not a big deal if you have months to make that decision.
My gf went drug free for the 2. She’s tougher than me haha.
Yeah, the wrong time to figure that out is at the spur of the moment. That's not a midwife issue.
Didn't realize no one was connected enough for C-sections. Must be rough - RIP. Maybe go fill out that survey about being poor under Trudeau and then get some NegRep.
How will you ever be The First or be Elboya without some C-sections?
Another here that used a midwife with babies born at the hospital. The level of care you get with a mimdwife is amazing in comparison to a regular physician. All of your checkups are done by the same few people and you are in and out of the hospital within a few hours of birth.
To fit in... using a regular physician is builder grade in this circumstance.
See when we had our kid. We had all that, except with a real doctor.
I don't think I'd be able to look at my tub the same. No matter how many people bleached it.
Just to jump in on the complications talk. When my daughter was born, she wasn't coming out and her heart rate started dropping so they did an emergency C-Sec 10 mins later. Turns out she had a true knot in her umbilical cord, and if they had continued to push there would have been great risk to baby and to my wife as the cord, with the knot in it, was not long enough to allow for a normal birth. That shit scared me. I often think about if we had been doing a home birth what would have happened. It's why before the wife got preggers again we agreed on planned C-sec.
Just my 2c.
Are hospitals jails now? You can leave anytime you want. They cannot stop you.
This thread is appropriately derailed now.
They're there to provide information to help you make an informed choice, and support and enable you through the process, but like any service provider, some are better than others at this and struggle to separate their own perspectives from your needs. (Realtors, midwives - who knew there were so many similarities)
Midwives have actual responsibility
Baby delivered as-is?
This is 100% the way. However for our 2nd, we didnt make it to hospital so baby came in front entryway. That was quite the event.
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Definitely, so much better than traditional doctors. Leaps and bounds. Plus they get paid less, save the taxpayers some dough
Yeah those doctors are a rude, overpaid bunch.
In some cases yes. For some things like surgeries, radiology, anesthesiology I think you 100% need the extensive training a doctor has. Midwives have proven (in my mind) like many things in this world, if you focus on and study / work toward being an expert at one thing only, you can do a great job.
No need for doctors to spend 8-12 years studying to deliver most babies.
Having SOME highly trained doctors available for when shit hits the fan with complicated pregnancies is definitely desirable.
I'm really tired of my kids being sick
We spent several months sick.... its literally the worst and super draining on everyone. Its tough dude.
But since Jan/Feb we've been super healthy... up till this morning with a sick kiddo. Hope we're just in for a quick cold/flu bug and back at it.
i feel bad for my wife, i think my oldest went to dayhome 6-7 days this month max. And my wife seems to be sick with them, i just go to work and skirt it with a little sore throat here and there :nut:
What a fucking grind haha
I probably posted to complain about it earlier, but in the fall we had a 3-month run of constant sickness, and somewhere near the tail end, we had a cold come on at the same time as pink-eye for the whole house. That was probably one of the more mentally challenging times of the last couple years. Being constantly sick and tired, then combine it with feeling like you have something stuck in your eye for a few days was simply awful haha.
Yah im with you guys on the long stretches, we're hoping to be coming to the end of one.
my 2.5'r had a rowdy goopy eye for a couple days, the baby a little bit, we managed to avoid it.
kids hate eye drops eh? Bubble gum meds are a big hit though :rofl:
Edit: i lied, just got a text, baby has an eye infection lol fml
Yeah I've been lucky that the last bout of sickness I've been away for a lot of it...ended up with a minor sniffle and sore head for a day when I was home, wife was forcing me to take oil of oregano so maybe that helped?
Worst thing about the kids meds these days is the amount of artificial colours and flavours, fuck me! We had basically stopped all artificial stuff with the toddler and it made such a difference...he's definitely back as bad as ever with his tantrums etc because for some reason fucking acetaminophen suspension needs to be purple and flavoured with something fake
The cost difference to buying kids meds in the states is staggering...100ml bottle is about $3 american vs $12 cad, mind-boggling cos it's all made in the same place
I didn't realize this thread got to 47 pages. Is there a good resource on where to start for researching things like cribs/strollers/baby seats?
I have a kid who has chronic respiratory problems. Been going on for 10 years. Not life threatening, but just a destroyer of quality of life for them (and us parents). Life sucks when you can't catch your breath, and every minor cold is a 2-3 week ordeal.
Cribs - ikea has some decent cheap options, beyond ballers might recommend West Coast Kids?
Strollers - Uppababy Vista or whatever is comparable, they're pricey but will last forever and you can get replacement parts. Lots of used ones on marketplace if you need to save some $$'s
Baby Seats - Uppababy toddler car-seat was ideal for us as you can remove it from the car (base remains) and you can carry the seat and baby around, now we've transitioned to something from Costco (no idea the brand, sorry) but its obviously stationary and doesn't come out of the car.
Congrats dude!
If Ikea sells it, buy that. Best. Combination of function and value going.
This is the beyond baller advice. For us normies, Car seat buy new from crappy tire, everything else used. Don't bother with new anything unless it protects your kid in a car accident or I used to convey food into your babies mouth. Cribs, strollers, clothes, furniture, receiving blankets, monitors etc. Don't waste your money on new as the used stuff is 80% off retail. You want an entire garbage back of 6-12mo clothes? Facebook Marketplace. You want a $500 uppawhatever stroller? $200 Facebook Marketplace.
I disagree. Ikea is cheap, and it's good at that. Function is questionable on some things, which adversely affects the value prop.
We had their high chair for a while, and it was hateful. Every person that set foot in our house, even those of us that live here, tripped on the legs constantly. It's a fucking horrible design, but it was cheap.
When we had our second kid, we replaced it with a Stokke Tripp Trapp. It was ~15x the cost, and ~20x better. Worth every penny, IMO.
edit: +1 for buying used. We bought nearly everything new, and ended up giving it away or selling it for pennies on the dollar :rofl:. I think our $750 nuna stroller got us maybe $200 on kijiji? And it was hardly used.
Huh, weird. We loved the Ikea high chair for our kids. Maybe they changed the design. Or maybe I'm weird. That's possible.
Thanks for the tips. I'm totally down for used on stroller/crib. I was looking at convertible cribs, because the narrative is that they last longer. I just didn't know which brands to look for/avoid when I check out the jeej and FB marketplace. My sister is having her second kiddo ~ 6 months ahead of us, so we should have a decent set of hand me downs, but I'll still need the big ticket items.
And I at least knew that car seats had to be brand new. And thanks! I haven't really mentioned it too many places, since last time we spread the news too early, and things didn't go as planned.
We called the Ikea chair "the grandparent tripper". Otherwise it's decent, super stable, and can be hosed down.
Ikea came out with a different design to their high chair. The tripping variety is the Antilop $22. Vs the Langur $130 (L shaped leg so less tripping). We have the Langur chair and the crib from Ikea.
Stroller we have is the City Select Lux with big wheels. I like it folds away pretty flat for how big it is and lots of storage for all the baby shit you can imagine. Converts to toddler seats also and has adapters for different infant carriers. Might be tall for some short people. But with it you know you got the bang for buck stroller and look in disgust at the UppaBaby owners as the degenerates they are with too much money. :D
Baby seat we have the NUNA infant carrier, most plush we have found and the baby liked being in it, which was weird.
Buy on sale when you can. Buy Buy baby used to price match West Coast kids sale prices. All this shit goes on sale.
Buy buy baby was closing down, and honestly, the closeout prices didn't seem that great.
We walked through west coast kids, but I can't see myself ever buying anything there.
@you&me is right, go to WCK and test that shit out there, see if it fits in the car do all of this and buy only when on sale.
We have so much WCK-purchased stuff. Fortunately it was almost all bought by grandparents haha.
They have decent car seat sales. I'm pretty sure they do ~30% off on their Diono seats periodically. The Diono seats are great. @ThePenIsMightier will tell you they are way too heavy, but unless you're taking it out of the car all the time, that doesn't much matter. They're super easy to get your kid in and out of, which I've noticed is the biggest differentiator from the budget Graco one both sets of grandparents bought. Graco are light and cheap, but the UX is horrible (for us, anyways).
I think any WCK stuff we had was from grand parents too... they went nuts first go 'round. :rofl:
We're a little past that point, especially because we eventually reached peak baby gear and coasted on hand-me-downs for a while, but I always recall the sales being shitty and the prices being ~20% higher as a baseline... Maybe things have gotten better more recently :dunno:
One point about some of the better baby gear, if you manage to keep it in OK condition, the resale value can be quite strong... IIRC, we sold a couple of our Stokke highchairs last year for ~$300, vs (I think) ~$400 new... Maybe that was still a post-covid market bump, but I was happy with the ROI/TCO.
I got really turned off the WCK.
Pretty sure their commissions/margins on certain products were hilariously higher than others and it really coloured their “reccomendations”.
I agree with go to WCK to look around if you need it same day, otherwise buy online for better deals.
Yeah I didn't enjoy wck either. I want less human interaction.
Buy the fanciest, used strollers on Kijiji, absolutely bag skate them for 2 years and then sell for a profit.
I made hundreds off our Maclaren and City Select strollers while the original buyers lost hundreds.
And BJ-stare can BJ-Me! Those fuckin Diono car seats were made of depleted uranium. Yes, I didn't have to move them frequently but I sure do remember the few times I did. (Every fucking plane trip somewhere...)
*shudder...
I love my diono. I just have Amazon deliver a new one to whenever I am going lmao
You limp wrists bitching about the weight of your Di-"oh-nos" got me curious, 'cause I always thought our Clek was on the heavy side... Looks like the foonf weighs about 5lbs more than the biggest Diono.
Like TPIM said, doesn't really seem like an issue outside of the few times a year you actually need to remove it for a trip or a deep cheerio removal.
I took our diono to Cuba as our travel car seat.
Never. Again.
We had a Thule stroller, the one with 3 wheels. Loved it. Easy to push and folds up with one hand. Definitely buy everything user. Less car seat maybe... we had a WCK crib with all the extras to go from a crib to toddler bed to a single bed....sold it for less than 1/5th purchase price after 3 or 4 years.....still have the matching dresser tho. Cheep Ikea high chair was awesome by me. Loved just taking it to the yard and hit it with the high pressure hose to clean it.
Our travel seat is the Evenflo Titan (Sale Walmart). Cheap, light, and replaceable. Kid likes it too. Easy to travel with.
Her main seat is the Graco 4ever (sale from WCK), put it in the car once. Never move it... Sell the car with it.
Well life comes at you fast. Baby came 6 weeks early yesterday. Everything good all things considering. Staff at the rocky view have been amazing.
You sure have to get your act together when the day comes. Will be a long 2+ weeks before we get to go home though.