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Thread: Happy Birthday Chuck Norris.

  1. 03-10-2010, 04:04 PM #1
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    Default Happy Birthday Chuck Norris.

    Well, I know the Chuck Norris thing is old and haggard by now. But today is his birthday, so why not!? He's 70 today.

    Chuck Norris Wiki

    Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

    Chuck Norris has already been to Mars, that's why there are no signs of life there.

    Chuck Norris can start a fire by rubbing two ice cubes together.

    ...etc...
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  2. 03-10-2010, 04:06 PM #2
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    70... wow hes in great shape for being 70!
    Originally posted by Mibz
    She's already exhibiting signs of turning into my Mom, I need some sort of legal recourse if a full-blown transformation occurs.
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  3. 03-10-2010, 04:09 PM #3
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    According to Einstein's theory of relativity, Chuck Norris can actually roundhouse kick you yesterday

    Crop circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*ck down

    Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

    Chuck Norris is 1/8th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a f*cuking Indian.

    Chuck Norris doesn't turn 70, 70 turns Chuck Norris.

    God said, "let there light". Chuck Norris said, "say please"

    Chuck Norris can beat Halo 3 on Legendary...with a guitar hero controller!
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  4. 03-10-2010, 04:16 PM #4
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    have a kick ass bday chuck
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  5. 03-10-2010, 04:27 PM #5
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    Chuck will never get old.

    Even after he dies, his legend will live on.
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  6. 03-10-2010, 04:31 PM #6
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    Originally posted by Kloubek
    Chuck will never get old.

    Even after he dies, his legend will live on.

    Actually, Chuck Norris died 10 years ago. The Reaper is just too scared to come and get him.
    Last edited by freshprince1; 03-10-2010 at 04:35 PM.
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  7. 03-10-2010, 04:46 PM #7
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    Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer, too bad he never cries

    Chuck Norris now has sex with men as he ran out of women

    Chuck Norris does not sleep, he waits
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  8. 03-10-2010, 05:55 PM #8
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    Chuck Norris once visited the British Virgin Islands...now they're simply known as the British Islands.

    Chuck Norris can divide by zero.

    btw that halo joke was new to me and golden.
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  9. 03-10-2010, 06:02 PM #9
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    Chuck Norris built Rome in a day.

    Under his beard Chuck Norris doesn't have a chin. He has another fist.

    When the boogey-man goes to sleep he checks his closet for Chuck Norris

    Chuck Norris once ate a whole bottle of sleeping pills. He blinked.

    Chuck Norris doesn't use a microwave because revenge is a dish best served cold.

    Chuck Norris grinds coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.


    Happy Birthday Chuck Norris!
    Arguing over the internet is like cheering on the Oilers. Win or lose, you're still a dumbass.


    Originally posted by G-ZUS
    you mack daddy
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  10. 03-10-2010, 06:03 PM #10
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    Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas. That one's mine hehe.
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  11. 03-10-2010, 06:51 PM #11
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    Chuck Norris has his cake, and eats it too
    Updated: March 10, 2022
    My list of random For Sale (some free) stuff
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  12. 03-10-2010, 06:54 PM #12
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    Originally posted by ekguy
    Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas. That one's mine hehe.
    And it's very good
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  13. 03-10-2010, 08:02 PM #13
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    Originally posted by ekguy
    Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas. That one's mine hehe.
    Actually, that really IS good. Nice job.
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  14. 03-10-2010, 08:17 PM #14
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    Originally posted by ekguy
    Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas. That one's mine hehe.
    great lie buddy
    the correct quote is "Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas"
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  15. 03-10-2010, 11:05 PM #15
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    Chuck Norris saves his urine and bottles it for sale as an energy drink. It's called Red Bull.
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  16. 03-10-2010, 11:08 PM #16
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    Originally posted by turbotrip


    great lie buddy
    the correct quote is "Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas"

    I've heard variations, " Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas " is one I have heard before, but way back in the day. I doubt he made it up either way.
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  17. 03-10-2010, 11:20 PM #17
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    Never trust a "man" who says hehe
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  18. 03-10-2010, 11:26 PM #18
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    Some say...that the Stig wears a t-shirt that says "I am Chuck Norris."

    I made that one up
    Originally posted by FraserB
    I think their main complaint is that they did not receive the stolen property they paid for.
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  19. 03-10-2010, 11:32 PM #19
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    Originally posted by Jeremiah
    Never trust a "man" who says hehe
    lol that is very true; replace those e's with a's and welcome to manhood

    but anyways its the first quote on the page http://www.commentsjunkie.com/chuck09.shtml
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  20. 03-11-2010, 01:13 AM #20
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    Originally posted by turbotrip


    great lie buddy
    the correct quote is "Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas"
    I'd never heard it before. Not like it's impossible to come up with something ourselves...I wouldn't of taken credit for it if I had heard it somewhere before.

    And happy b-day Chuck Norris!!! Have a friend who had her birthday today too hehe.
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