Official Kijiji Funnies Thread

[ThePenIsMightier]

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Nothing really, but saves some bored Kijiji idiot from causing you grief when you don’t accept their lowball.

My offer was more than fair, you cunt!!!

[dirtsniffer]

I'm actually ok with the flames on the underside of the hood. That's about it hahah. Tooth grill is A+

[13TTFX4]

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My offer was more than fair, you cunt!!!

My Gf went through this last night she was selling her tiburon stupid cheap because it needs some work and she gets her new car today. had like a hundred inquiries so set up multiple showings guy says he wants to come check it out nothing more. one showing went long so messaged guy that he might have to wait 15 minutes and then he goes on a tangent he's driving from calg to edmonton for it and that she needs to stop showing it immediately but keep in mind he never said this and didnt give a deposit or even say he was seriously interested. she was more than polite and he proceeded to yell at her and called her a stupid b**** said he wanted her last name and that he was going to find her. Luckily she's much calmer than me and just hung up.

[dirtsniffer]

https://www.facebook.com/marketplace...ok_story_share

[killramos]

Poor deluded bastard. FB marketplace is a hilarious concept because you can creep the seller for extra lulz

[dirtsniffer]

I should have captured the photo with the giant illest sticker across the rear window.

[killramos]

Dunno. Low standards across the front is at least as hilarious.

[TomcoPDR]

B+ for the effort. Unless some of u find that insanely hilarious

Got a chuckle outta me, but not a spit my coffee pissing my pants rofl

[SKR]

Here's a fucker who's off by at least one zero. (Edit: The 3, 5 and one of the 0s can't all be in the asking price together. One of them has to go.)

https://www.kijiji.ca/v-cars-trucks/...box/1567906688

86 c10 long box
$3,500.00
Posted 54 minutes ago
Alberta Beach, AB T0E 0A0

Seized 305 , 700r4 , long box lowered back end , needs too be restored, needs too be trailered

[SkiBum5.0]

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Here's a fucker who's off by at least one zero. (Edit: The 3, 5 and one of the 0s can't all be in the asking price together. One of them has to go.)

https://www.kijiji.ca/v-cars-trucks/...box/1567906688

Almost every square body is laughable on Kijiji. People just right out to lunch. “Almost no rust” means it needs cab corners or floors or drip rails. Usually all of the above

[SKR]

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Almost every square body is laughable on Kijiji. People just right out to lunch. “Almost no rust” means it needs cab corners or floors or drip rails. Usually all of the above

Yeah "almost rust free, just needs cab corners, fenders and rockers." Right on.

[ianmcc]

[SKR]

Sometimes it's fun to put "wired for subs" into a Canada-wide search and just marvel at the trash that comes up.

[ThePenIsMightier]

The last two things I've sold on Kijiji, the Buyer paid the full amount with E-transfer days before picking it up. All I asked for was a deposit to hold and I prolly would've taken like $20 so it's enough that they don't really want to lose it, but if they do, it makes my minor inconvenience worth something.

Is this becoming more common? Would you give a Seller $250 for something you're not picking up for almost a week?
I sure as fuck wouldn't.

[firebane]

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The last two things I've sold on Kijiji, the Buyer paid the full amount with E-transfer days before picking it up. All I asked for was a deposit to hold and I prolly would've taken like $20 so it's enough that they don't really want to lose it, but if they do, it makes my minor inconvenience worth something.

Is this becoming more common? Would you give a Seller $250 for something you're not picking up for almost a week?
I sure as fuck wouldn't.

I had a old motorbike on Kijiji once and sold it for $800 I think. Guy said he couldn't pick up for 2 weeks but would send the money so I wouldn't sell it.

2 weeks later he showed up and took his bike.

Had a Jeep cherokee for sale and sold it for $900 and the guy was from Llyodminister and paid EMT and said he'd be by in 5 days and he was and picked it up.

[ThePenIsMightier]

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I had a old motorbike on Kijiji once and sold it for $800 I think. Guy said he couldn't pick up for 2 weeks but would send the money so I wouldn't sell it.

2 weeks later he showed up and took his bike.

Had a Jeep cherokee for sale and sold it for $900 and the guy was from Llyodminister and paid EMT and said he'd be by in 5 days and he was and picked it up.

So, what is making us look so awesome and trustworthy?
How can we capitalize on this, further?
Can this trick @SKR into trusting me again?

[ExtraSlow]

Last truck I sold was pre-bought by a beyond member who didn't even take it for a test drive, just did daily interact e-transfers from him and his wife until it was paid in full and then he came and picked up the keys.

[ThePenIsMightier]

Meh. I think that's different from my lukewarm 4.2 rating on Kijiji.

[JfuckinC]

I put something up for free and left it out for the guy and he gave me a 4 star review haha, what a cunt!

[03ozwhip]

I just bought a set of wheels from a lady from BC. I've been in contact with her for over a month. She asked for a 250 deposit, I agreed to 50, they were worth losing 50 if she wanted to be a fuck.

She drove to calgary from BC this past weekend and I picked them up. Best transaction I've ever done.