So I am getting married on Aug 20. My best man was a tough choice but I picked my friend who is pretty much my brother, we have been friends since we were 6. His mom still invites me over for thanks giving and all that. Seemed like a reasonable choice.
Now fast forward to recently. I havent seen him since Gray Cup (where he fell asleep), he has not been involved in planning at all, I have lots of friends asking me what is going on with my stag, etc. I have texted him repeatedly asking what is going on and if I can help him at all.
The problem is he is still like a brother to me, except one of the annoying brothers you only see at Christmas. Now the other 3 guys in my wedding party are capable and around. However how do I ask one (or all) of these guys to help out or relieve the bestman?
I was asked to be in a wedding party and was sent this list:
I am thinking about sending him this and asking if he wants to back out. What do you think too douchy?Prior To Wedding
• Host the bachelor party.
• Purchase or pay for rental of own wedding attire.
• Attend rehearsal and rehearsal dinner.
Day of Ceremony
• Make arrangements to transport the groom to the ceremony and see that he is properly dressed.
• Arrive dressed at ceremony site one hour before the wedding for photographs.
• Supervise the groomsmen and ushers.
• Hold the bride's ring during the ceremony.
• Sign the wedding certificate as a legal witness.
• Forward any payment to the ceremony officiant, musicians, etc.
• Make transportation arrangements for newlyweds, maid of honor, and himself to the reception.
• Offer the first toast to the bride and groom at the reception.
• Transport the couple to the airport or honeymoon suite.
• Organize the return of all rented formalwear.
I dont know what to do. This whole wedding experience has been horrid, it has brought out the worst in some family members and friends. It has been tough cutting the list down and have pissed off a lot of people. I have tried talking to him so far but havent really given him the whole chat yet. Problem is he is a people pleaser so if I tell him I am expecting this done he will say he will get it done (although I dont think I can reasonably expect him too).
Ideas? My other three groomsman are solid guys who I could easily trust to get this done. I didnt really think about this situation when I asked him to do it. Can I 'unask' him and ask the other guy (who I should have picked to begin with) how do I do that?
TYIA