Free Range Parenting, or Helicopter Parenting?

[spikerS]

So, I just saw this in my news feed on FB, and it got me to thinking...

http://news.nationalpost.com/2015/01...ng-home-alone/

http://www.cbc.ca/thecurrent/episode...g-kid-neglect/

In the first example, a mother left her 6 year old home alone for 90 minutes while she ran some errands, and is now charged with child abandonment, and could face 5 years in jail...

The second example, a mother chose to let her 2 children, aged 10 and 6 walk home together from the park in the neighborhood.

The topic up for debate isn't so much what you did as a kid, but what you are expected to do today as a parent.

Myself, we are guilty of both of these things. But it is very dependent on the child IMO. Our 9 year old we have no issues with leaving her home alone for an hour, while our 5 year old, we wouldn't trust her for more than checking the mail. Same goes for school. Our eldest walks alone to and from school when she feels like it, and while the first couple of times were nerve racking, we are 100% comfortable with it now.

What does Beyond think?

[Team_Mclaren]

I was taking the bus to the mall and shit by myself when i was propbably around 7. I think you are right that it depends on the kid, but the western world is too pussified on shit like this.

[FraserB]

The only reason this is even an issue is that retarded people think that there are pedophiles and criminals hiding in every bush.

By the time I have kids and raise them, I'm pretty sure all my parenting methods would be considered crimes.

[MGCM]

better lock your kids up at home and hold their hand 24/7 till they turn 18...........society..........ubur fail

[vengie]

Originally posted by Team_Mclaren
I was taking the bus to the mall and shit by myself when i was propbably around 7. I think you are right that it depends on the kid, but the western world is too pussified on shit like this.

Originally posted by FraserB
The only reason this is even an issue is that retarded people think that there are pedophiles and criminals hiding in every bush.

By the time I have kids and raise them, I'm pretty sure all my parenting methods would be considered crimes.

Both of these exactly.

[HiTempguy1]

Remember though, denying your kid treatment in Canada for cancer and basically killing them is A-OK!

[Mibz]

Originally posted by Team_Mclaren
I was taking the bus to the mall and shit by myself when i was propbably around 7. I think you are right that it depends on the kid, but the western world is too pussified on shit like this.

I read this as "I was taking the bus to the mall and shit myself when I was probably around 7".

And I thought "Yeah, I was scared of public transit at that age as well".

[blairtruck]

i want to my kid to walk to a close school as early as possibly.
my wife wants to drive our kid to a further school until they have their own vehicle by the sounds of it.

I will end up winning.

Just this morning i had a physio at 7AM. wife bikes to work at 630. but had to leave late today because of my appointment. she was bitching over text that she was gonna be super late.
when i was 5 min away i messaged saying she could leave. she wouldn't cause toddler was still asleep.

i got home, she left. kid slept for another hour.

[btimbit]

I try to teach my girlfriends 3 year old as much independence as possible, which is a foreign concept in her family. He's 3 so nothing crazy, so for the last year it's just been stuff like getting him to get his own milk when he's thirsty and do more stuff without help. Then by contrast there's a 9 year old in her family that would starve to death in a house full of food if there wasn't someone to get it for her.

I think some parents might be doing too much for their kids simply because they're afraid of being called lazy parents. I get called that all the time from my girlfriends family because I make this kid wipe his own ass. And that's certainly the main reason his mom babies him so much, because she's scared of looking like a lazy parent in front of her family, especially since her family is made up of awful parents, so she overcompensates and now is a bit of a helicopter parent.

Too many people confuse independent kids with neglected kids, that's all. They see a kid walking home alone from school and their first thought is "Where are that kids parents?" Is that kid walking home from school because mommy is busy rolling another joint? Maybe. Or maybe the kid just happens to be mature enough to walk a few blocks in broad daylight without getting lost or raped.

[btimbit]

Originally posted by Mibz
I read this as "I was taking the bus to the mall and shit myself when I was probably around 7".

And I thought "Yeah, I was scared of public transit at that age as well".

When I read that the first time I thought he was saying he literally shit himself on the bus when he was 7

[revelations]

I used to walk home to/from school at the age of 6 in Vancouver in the 1980s, 15 minutes one way. Had to contend with no school zones, crazy dogs and strange people.

Its not like there are necessarily more predators pedophiles etc. - its that they are more intensely highlighted in the media and people panic at the first sign of any trouble.

[sputnik]

I specifically bought a house within walking distance of a good school so that I wouldn't have to deal with figuring out how to get them to and from school.

Right now my wife walks my son to Kindergarten (as do all of the other moms) but the moment one kid starts walking on his own all of the other kids will shoo their moms away. When my daughter starts kindergarten I suspect my son will just be in charge of getting her to school.

That said. Leaving a six year old at home for a couple of hours to run errands is just stupid. Is it really that hard to take your son to the store to get a couple of groceries?

My son is close to that age and while he might not cause himself a great deal of trouble, should something serious happen that was out of his control he probably isn't equipped well enough to deal with it on his own.

[Quiet10]

I started walking to school by myself starting in Grade 1, and so did most of the kids in my neighbourhood at the time. It was at least a 15 minute walk... Today's society is way too pussified for sure but good luck convincing some parents that.

[max_boost]

1. Lock the kid up in a room so no escape is possible.
2. Plant a chip so they can be tracked everywhere just like your iphone.

i mean that's where we are headed right.

[clem24]

Originally posted by sputnik
That said. Leaving a six year old at home for a couple of hours to run errands is just stupid. Is it really that hard to take your son to the store to get a couple of groceries?

My son is close to that age and while he might not cause himself a great deal of trouble, should something serious happen that was out of his control he probably isn't equipped well enough to deal with it on his own.

Agreed!! I always thought it was legally something like 10 or 12 but not sure anymore. If you consider your 6 year old to be old enough to stay at home by themselves, then they are likely old enough that they aren't a PITA to bring with you. My 6 year old buckles his own seat belt and oh heaven forbid, in a mall walks/goes to the washroom by himself.

So really why leave them at home? Even when I was a kid, the rule was something like 10 or 12 years old before you can be left alone and I still say that holds true.

[baygirl]

Originally posted by sputnik
I specifically bought a house within walking distance of a good school so that I wouldn't have to deal with figuring out how to get them to and from school.

Right now my wife walks my son to Kindergarten (as do all of the other moms) but the moment one kid starts walking on his own all of the other kids will shoo their moms away. When my daughter starts kindergarten I suspect my son will just be in charge of getting her to school.

I believe here in Calgary kindergarten students aren't allowed to leave the school until the teacher sees a parent/approved caregiver. If no one is there the kid goes into the office and a parent is called.

[baygirl]

Our oldest was 9 when we started leaving her home alone for a few minutes(under 30 minutes). We gradually built it up and will now leave her for up to an hour. Our youngest on the other hand will probably be in junior high before we consider it All depends on the kid and their maturity level(for instance some nights I regret leaving spikerS home alone.

[Black Gts]

When I was 5 I walked myself to school, there was a shortcut that involved a creek or the long way over the bridge. I think I used the bridge twice.

[max_boost]

I started skipping school in gr.1 and got in so much shit for it. I couldn't tell time I would walk down the alley and through this back route to a yellow bridge, chill for a bit and then come back home. Grandma be like WTF? I did that randomly until I got busted.

[suntan]

Originally posted by baygirl

I believe here in Calgary kindergarten students aren't allowed to leave the school until the teacher sees a parent/approved caregiver. If no one is there the kid goes into the office and a parent is called.

They only do that for the first couple of weeks, after it's every rug rat for themselves.