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Thread: Beerflu is just a hoax circlejerk thread

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    Default Beerflu is just a hoax circlejerk thread

    A thread for all the Mitsus on the other side of the aisle to express their opinions in a safe and non-condescending environment. If this was a real threat, they wouldn't name it after a beer amirite?

    I will start you guys off with these beauties.

    https://www.rollingstone.com/culture...theory-942416/

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    Last edited by The_Rural_Juror; 03-13-2020 at 02:39 PM.
    Quote Originally Posted by 89coupe View Post
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    Beyond, bunch of creme puffs on this board.
    Everything I say is satire.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 88CRX View Post
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    Don't you grandpa simpson me.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 89coupe View Post
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    Beyond, bunch of creme puffs on this board.
    Everything I say is satire.

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    I heard most of the "corona virus" deaths are actually because the people stopped breathing.

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    Quote Originally Posted by blitz View Post
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    I heard most of the "corona virus" deaths are actually because the people stopped breathing.
    Precisely. Here are WHO's observations. It is abundantly clear that the vast majority of people die for that exact reason.

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    It is absolutely unfair to characterize these deaths as due to the beerflu if people would simply breathe more. How hard can it be? Even a kid can do it. Wake up people!
    Quote Originally Posted by 89coupe View Post
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    Beyond, bunch of creme puffs on this board.
    Everything I say is satire.

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    I’ll throw this copypasta in this circle jerk thread as to avoid politicizing the other ones. But holy fuck this is almost funny if it wasn’t actually such a serious issue

    �� MURICA!
    __________________________________
    A timeline of Trump’s statements on Coronavirus / COVID19:

    January 22: “We have it totally under control. It’s one person coming in from China. It’s going to be just fine.”

    February 2: “We pretty much shut it down coming in from China.”

    February 24: “The Coronavirus is very much under control in the USA… Stock Market starting to look very good to me!”

    February 25: “CDC and my Administration are doing a GREAT job of handling Coronavirus.”

    February 25: “I think that's a problem that’s going to go away… They have studied it. They know very much. In fact, we’re very close to a vaccine.”

    February 26: “The 15 (cases in the US) within a couple of days is going to be down to close to zero.”

    February 26: “We're going very substantially down, not up.”

    February 27: “One day it’s like a miracle, it will disappear.”

    February 28: “We're ordering a lot of supplies. We're ordering a lot of, uh, elements that frankly we wouldn't be ordering unless it was something like this. But we're ordering a lot of different elements of medical.”

    March 2: “You take a solid flu vaccine, you don't think that could have an impact, or much of an impact, on corona?”

    March 2: “A lot of things are happening, a lot of very exciting things are happening and they’re happening very rapidly.”

    March 4: “If we have thousands or hundreds of thousands of people that get better just by, you know, sitting around and even going to work — some of them go to work, but they get better.”

    March 5: “I NEVER said people that are feeling sick should go to work.”

    March 5: “The United States… has, as of now, only 129 cases… and 11 deaths. We are working very hard to keep these numbers as low as possible!”

    March 6: “I think we’re doing a really good job in this country at keeping it down… a tremendous job at keeping it down.”

    March 6: “Anybody right now, and yesterday, anybody that needs a test gets a test. They’re there. And the tests are beautiful…. the tests are all perfect like the letter was perfect. The transcription was perfect. Right? This was not as perfect as that but pretty good.”

    March 6: “I like this stuff. I really get it. People are surprised that I understand it… Every one of these doctors said, ‘How do you know so much about this?’ Maybe I have a natural ability. Maybe I should have done that instead of running for president.”

    March 6: “I don't need to have the numbers double because of one ship that wasn't our fault.”

    March 8: “We have a perfectly coordinated and fine tuned plan at the White House for our attack on CoronaVirus.”

    March 9: “This blindsided the world.” ~
    ______________________

    March 13: Trump declares a national emergency

    Author: Lisa D.

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    Fine gloves are off with regards to politicizing. Trudeau just told everyone that there is not such thing as asymptomatic transmission and not everyone should get tested.

    The truth comes out now that there is plenty of toilet paper available. The liberal media perpetuated this hoax to help drive up tp sales. Proof: https://www.theglobeandmail.com/busi...oducer-kruger/+

    Further proof that this is a hoax perpetuated by the do-nothing libs.

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    Last edited by The_Rural_Juror; 03-13-2020 at 04:13 PM.
    Quote Originally Posted by 89coupe View Post
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    Beyond, bunch of creme puffs on this board.
    Everything I say is satire.

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    Quote Originally Posted by blitz View Post
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    I heard most of the "corona virus" deaths are actually because the people stopped breathing.
    No. 100% of Corona death are because the people were living when they got it.

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    This is all overblown by the fake news media. If it is so dangerous, why aren't we all dead?!?! More people die from explosive farts every year. That is a fact!
    Quote Originally Posted by 89coupe View Post
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    Beyond, bunch of creme puffs on this board.
    Everything I say is satire.

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    Like the asshole he is, Trudeau didn't "pull out all of the stops" for "Team Canada" on COVID until his wife tested positive. I hope he gets sick
    Last edited by nicknolte; 03-13-2020 at 08:14 PM.

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    People were speculating he didn't want to limit flights till his wife got back home. If true, what a piece of shit move.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kg810 View Post
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    People were speculating he didn't want to limit flights till his wife got back home. If true, what a piece of shit move.
    Did they release details on HOW they are restricting flights?
    Quote Originally Posted by killramos View Post
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    You realize you are talking to the guy who made his own furniture out of salad bowls right?

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kg810 View Post
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    People were speculating he didn't want to limit flights till his wife got back home. If true, what a piece of shit move.
    Lol, as if private jets aren't being allowed anyways.

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    Quote Originally Posted by ExtraSlow View Post
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    Did they release details on HOW they are restricting flights?
    As of this moment not really. It's basically an advisory and a "warning"

    They are looking into limiting the amount of inbound flights from affected areas so they have enough resources to handle arrivals and ensure they won't have the infection. Which I have no zero confidence that'll be effective at all.

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    Quote Originally Posted by nicknolte View Post
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    Like the asshole he is, Trudeau didn't "pull out all of the stops" for "Team Canada" on COVID until his wife tested positive. I hope he gets sick
    If this is "all the stops" we are screwed. Thankfully it's a fake illness to drive up sales at Costco.
    Quote Originally Posted by 89coupe View Post
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    Beyond, bunch of creme puffs on this board.
    Everything I say is satire.

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    Im confused about what this thread is.

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    Quote Originally Posted by dirtsniffer View Post
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    Im confused about what this thread is.
    In 2020 we finally learn how to wash our hands.

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    Quote Originally Posted by dirtsniffer View Post
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    Im confused about what this thread is.
    Something that should be in the new Coronavirus sub-forum, that's what.
    Quote Originally Posted by killramos View Post
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    You realize you are talking to the guy who made his own furniture out of salad bowls right?

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    Mods obviously realize how much of a hoax this is by not legitimizing it with a subforum.
    Quote Originally Posted by 89coupe View Post
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    Beyond, bunch of creme puffs on this board.
    Everything I say is satire.

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    Quote Originally Posted by ExtraSlow View Post
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    Something that should be in the new Coronavirus sub-forum, that's what.
    It should really be a permanent feature too, to document what we lived through for future generations.

    We promise we won’t completely forget about this pandemic next time.
    Originally posted by Thales of Miletus

    If you think I have been trying to present myself as intellectually superior, then you truly are a dimwit.
    Originally posted by Toma
    fact.
    Quote Originally Posted by Yolobimmer View Post
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    guessing who I might be, psychologizing me with your non existent degree.

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