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Thread: Fake coronavirus news! I am not running out of toilet paper!

  1. #61
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    Quote Originally Posted by ercchry View Post
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    Rejoice! There is now a bidet for the masses!
    How is that different than a battery operated Waterpik that I currently use for my guest bathroom? These companies...stealing all my great ideas.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 89coupe View Post
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    Beyond, bunch of creme puffs on this board.
    Everything I say is satire.

  2. #62
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    Bunch of amateurs in here.

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    2007 GMC 2500 Duramax
    1981 GMC C1500 454

  3. #63
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    Quote Originally Posted by SKR View Post
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    Bunch of amateurs in here.
    It's a bit cold outside for that, isnt' it? I just shaved my ass. I don't want icicles replacing my ass hairs.
    Quote Originally Posted by 89coupe View Post
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    Beyond, bunch of creme puffs on this board.
    Everything I say is satire.

  4. #64
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    Quote Originally Posted by The_Rural_Juror View Post
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    It's a bit cold outside for that, isnt' it? I just shaved my ass. I don't want icicles replacing my ass hairs.
    The cool air can be invigorating, and it's good to let your neighbors know that the effects of recessions and self isolation manifest themselves in unpredictable ways. Seeing you go out in the yard and blast yourself with a garden hose, with little regard for your own well being or anyone else's, will put them on their heels to say the least.
    2007 GMC 2500 Duramax
    1981 GMC C1500 454

  5. #65
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    Quote Originally Posted by SKR View Post
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    Bunch of amateurs in here.

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    Still amateur

  6. #66
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    Quote Originally Posted by SKR View Post
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    Bunch of amateurs in here.

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    But what if I want a vodka mix?

  7. #67
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    Like wiping your ass with a kitten :
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    Quote Originally Posted by killramos View Post
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    You realize you are talking to the guy who made his own furniture out of salad bowls right?

  8. #68
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    Quote Originally Posted by ExtraSlow View Post
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    Like wiping your ass with a kitten :
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    I stopped counting after I turned into a ferret. My ferret story is evolving.
    Quote Originally Posted by 89coupe View Post
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    Beyond, bunch of creme puffs on this board.
    Everything I say is satire.

  9. #69
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    Don't act like you didn't take this new piece of data and ferret it away somewhere for future use. You can lie to ExtraSlow, but don't lie to Phil Collins' mullet.
    Quote Originally Posted by killramos View Post
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    You realize you are talking to the guy who made his own furniture out of salad bowls right?

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    On this auction site, since I ain’t no Beyond baller. This local auction house that deals with big store returns, oh man so many packs of TP to bid on now.


  11. #71
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    Went to Costco today, they only had Charmin TP $25.98 30 rolls. No Kirkland Signature. Too bad. Next week Charmin goes on sale $5 off.

    Always used Kirkland. Charmin any good?
    Originally posted by GTS Jeff
    You know those bored stay at home moms who's entire lives revolve around driving their kids to soccer, various cleaning accessories, and worrying about neighbourhood rapists? The kind of people that watch the View and go "uh huh..." Those unfulfilled people who try to fill the void in their empty lives by writing whiny letters to the editor complaining about shit that no one really cares about?

    Well imagine if instead of writing that letter to the editor, she just posts on a car forum for car enthusiasts. That's Kritafo.

  12. #72
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    It is the apocalypse, apparently.
    Quote Originally Posted by killramos View Post
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    You realize you are talking to the guy who made his own furniture out of salad bowls right?

  13. #73
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    Bought another dozen rolls of TP today at Huntington Superstore. They had almost an entire isle full of the stuff. Shortage averted?
    Quote Originally Posted by killramos View Post
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    You realize you are talking to the guy who made his own furniture out of salad bowls right?

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    Low egg inventory at Costco over the past few weeks.
    Quote Originally Posted by 89coupe View Post
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    Beyond, bunch of creme puffs on this board.
    Everything I say is satire.

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    Good gawd I can't imagine going to Costco right now. Superstore is bad enough. Safeway by comparison is almost pleasant.
    Quote Originally Posted by killramos View Post
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    You realize you are talking to the guy who made his own furniture out of salad bowls right?

  16. #76
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    Quote Originally Posted by The_Rural_Juror View Post
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    Low egg inventory at Costco over the past few weeks.
    We've been buying straight from a farmer for a few months now. No supply problems for me!

    I don't think he'll let a ferret near his chickens though, sorry

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tik-Tok View Post
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    I don't think he'll let a ferret near his chickens though, sorry
    Of course not, they are COVID carriers.
    https://www.the-scientist.com/news-o...-2-study-67374

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    Whoa whoa whoa...fake news, edge case, non-peer reviewed, anecdotal, lib media, illogical, yo momma.
    Quote Originally Posted by 89coupe View Post
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    Beyond, bunch of creme puffs on this board.
    Everything I say is satire.

  19. #79
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    Had a little moment today that had be reminiscing back to those simpler times when toilet-paper and booze seemed like our biggest worries. Bought a 30 pack of double rolls of the kitten brand today. After I was done stocking up the four bathrooms in my modest duplex, there were none left to put in the linen closet where I normally store excess paper products. I guess that means my toilet paper count is still above 30 rolls, although it feels like less when it's dispersed . . . .
    Quote Originally Posted by killramos View Post
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    You realize you are talking to the guy who made his own furniture out of salad bowls right?

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    Quote Originally Posted by ExtraSlow View Post
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    Had a little moment today that had be reminiscing back to those simpler times when toilet-paper and booze seemed like our biggest worries. Bought a 30 pack of double rolls of the kitten brand today. After I was done stocking up the four bathrooms in my modest duplex, there were none left to put in the linen closet where I normally store excess paper products. I guess that means my toilet paper count is still above 30 rolls, although it feels like less when it's dispersed . . . .
    This is just a misdirection when wave 2 comes.

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