Quantcast
School me on being a Dad - Page 6 - Beyond.ca - Car Forums
Page 6 of 92 FirstFirst ... 5 6 7 16 ... LastLast
Results 101 to 120 of 1830

Thread: School me on being a Dad

  1. #101
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Location
    Beaumont
    My Ride
    Touareg, Cayenne, 944s
    Posts
    717
    Rep Power
    29

    Default

    I took 3 full weeks, then worked 2 days a week for 2 weeks, then 3 days for 2 weeks, then back full time. Wife took one year then back 3 days a week now that daycare is back open.

  2. #102
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Calgary AB
    My Ride
    V8s
    Posts
    4,572
    Rep Power
    100

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Skrilla View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    Thankfully my wife is a RN so she knows most of the nurses at the hospital. I got some great ideas to make life easier for sure, much appreciated! We have an ultrasound next week to hopefully determine gender.

    Was curious, for time off, how much did you guys take off when your child was born? Was thinking 10-14 days tops but maybe that's off.
    I took about 10 weeks. My company is pretty good, they offer 17 weeks of parental leave at 85% of my salary. I had intended to take the whole 17 weeks, but the right opportunity at work came up, so I came back for that.

    We're expecting our second on July 20th, and again I'm planning on taking the whole time, but anticipate coming back a little bit early if the right role comes up.

    The first it was mostly like vacation. She was an easy baby, and both of our parents are in town, so we just enjoyed lots of family time. I'm anticipating this will be much more work for us as a couple, since we have a busy toddler to chase around.

    I would take as much time as you can justify being away from work.

  3. #103
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    Homeless
    My Ride
    Blue Dabadee
    Posts
    9,599
    Rep Power
    100

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by cjblair View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    I took about 10 weeks. My company is pretty good, they offer 17 weeks of parental leave at 85% of my salary. I had intended to take the whole 17 weeks, but the right opportunity at work came up, so I came back for that.

    We're expecting our second on July 20th, and again I'm planning on taking the whole time, but anticipate coming back a little bit early if the right role comes up.

    The first it was mostly like vacation. She was an easy baby, and both of our parents are in town, so we just enjoyed lots of family time. I'm anticipating this will be much more work for us as a couple, since we have a busy toddler to chase around.

    I would take as much time as you can justify being away from work.
    That’s an insane amount of time off.
    Last edited by killramos; 07-08-2020 at 12:35 PM.
    Originally posted by Thales of Miletus

    If you think I have been trying to present myself as intellectually superior, then you truly are a dimwit.
    Originally posted by Toma
    fact.
    Quote Originally Posted by Yolobimmer View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote

    guessing who I might be, psychologizing me with your non existent degree.

  4. #104
    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    Calgary, AB
    My Ride
    2008 Mercedes Benz C230, 1968 Chevy Impala
    Posts
    1,916
    Rep Power
    28

    Default

    If you want to learn about car seats, just message me. Did inspections/installs full time for 7 years.

    My little guy is creeping up on 2. Its been amazing but also one of the hardest things I've done. Make sure you keep it balanced, ie. if the kiddo wakes up crying in the night, take half of the turns going to sooth/change/feed. You dont get special privileges just because you get to go to work everyday. And put the phone down. They grow at a lightning pace and it will be over before you know it, so be mindful to be present.
    1968 Impala: Status: Stored
    1977 Dodge Triple E RV: Sold
    1989 Mercedes Benz 420 SEL: Sold
    2008 Mercedes Benz C230: Cruising
    2000 Bluebird TC2000: Build phase of skoolie project
    2018 Rav4 XLE: New baby friendly daily

  5. #105
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    calgary
    Posts
    2,028
    Rep Power
    96

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by killramos View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    I am personally extremely shocked the number of you who went with either a midwife/doula or having home births rather than relying on doctors and hospitals.

    Maybe it’s just a cultural thing for me but that isn’t something that would be anything resembling being on my radar.
    FYI Doula /= Midwife.

    A Doula is a support person and will be with you during the birth, but they don't have any medical involvement.


    To O.P
    First off congrats! its a amazing time and live in the moment.
    My wife and I had a doula (which I personally highly recommend) and she was phenomenal.

    My Tips:
    Birthing process
    1) Take over the room, lights off play music, move the bed in any way you want. Keep your wife moving as much as possible.
    2) Snacks! Bring a lot of snacks... My wife labored for nearly 18 hours (hence why a doula is phenomenal)
    3) Keep her hydrated - Even if she doesn't want water, have her drink some every 10 mins

    At Home
    1) Have your baby introduced to a bottle ASAP!! This will allow you to take over 1 night feed and allow mom an extra couple hours of sleep - this is a big deal.
    We had our son introduced to a bottle on day 3, and wife pumped all milk required.
    2) Move baby to their own crib/ room relatively quickly (We moved our son into his crib at 4 weeks) This will drastically improve sleep for both of you
    3) Don't buy new things - they are expensive as hell, kids out grow things extremely fast and things are cheap on kijiji/ marketplace
    4) Dr Chase Kolik Gripe Water ,this stuff has been gold in our house as our son was/ is quite gassy - Get the good stuff, not the alcohol free. Its very gentle on baby so no worries.

    Again live in the moment and good luck! If you want me to elaborate on any of this PM me.

  6. #106
    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Location
    Calgary
    My Ride
    13 Cayenne Turbo
    Posts
    274
    Rep Power
    20

    Default

    I just had my second on the 23rd. Definitely a change having a toddler plus a little one. I took off 2 weeks, back to work this week but still working from home so I can still go help with nap time and anything else that's needed. So far so good though and wife hasn't needed much help.

  7. #107
    Join Date
    Jun 1987
    Location
    SK
    My Ride
    Fit Dugan Signature (2016)
    Posts
    3,375
    Rep Power
    100

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by BavarianBeast View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    For the love of god don’t snip the poor fella
    No kidding, what on earth is with the complete acceptance and encouragement of genital mutilation for boys?
    Originally posted by SJW
    Once again another useless post by JRSCOOLDUDE.
    Originally posted by snowcat
    Don't let the e-thugs and faggots get to you when they quote your posts and write stupid shit.
    Originally posted by JRSC00LUDE
    I say stupid shit all the time.
    ^^ Fact Checked

  8. #108
    Join Date
    Jun 2014
    Location
    Calgary
    Posts
    1,100
    Rep Power
    20

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Skrilla View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    Oh there is no way I'm peaking haha.
    The nurse made me look with my second and it was pretty intense.....

    Quote Originally Posted by killramos View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    I am personally extremely shocked the number of you who went with either a midwife/doula or having home births rather than relying on doctors and hospitals.

    Maybe it’s just a cultural thing for me but that isn’t something that would be anything resembling being on my radar.
    Im really surprised too but after reading the posts i would probably go midwife/hospital route too. We got lucky with our kids because the nurses were all amazing but i could see the experience being way better with an actual person being there the whole time helping my wife out
    Quote Originally Posted by Mitsu3000gt View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    and I did not have the only say in the matter (most people just want it done ASAP and don't care about quality).
    Quote Originally Posted by Mitsu3000gt View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    If anything we made a better decision because we had a consensus and were all on the same page.

  9. #109
    Join Date
    Oct 2014
    Location
    alberta
    Posts
    324
    Rep Power
    16

    Default

    vengie- your advice on the bottle made me laugh. I had a friend say breastfeeding is the only way to go this way they never had to help with bottles.

  10. #110
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    Calgary
    My Ride
    Ford, Acura
    Posts
    2,219
    Rep Power
    56

    Default

    I took a month off with my first born and was planning for the same amount of time with my second until covid happened and it turned into 3 months. Not only was it beneficial for my wife to have me around as we navigated life with a baby, but it really helped me and forming a bond with the tiny human who is now screaming at me all the time. I wouldn't have traded that time for anything in the world. We try not to give any unsolicited advice to any new parents because we know how brutal and scary most of that advice can be, but the one piece of advice I do give any expecting dads is take as much time off as you possibly can because its time you will never get back and your wife could really use a hand.

    Quote Originally Posted by vengie View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    FYI Doula /= Midwife.

    A Doula is a support person and will be with you during the birth, but they don't have any medical involvement.


    To O.P
    First off congrats! its a amazing time and live in the moment.
    My wife and I had a doula (which I personally highly recommend) and she was phenomenal.

    My Tips:
    Birthing process
    1) Take over the room, lights off play music, move the bed in any way you want. Keep your wife moving as much as possible.
    2) Snacks! Bring a lot of snacks... My wife labored for nearly 18 hours (hence why a doula is phenomenal)
    3) Keep her hydrated - Even if she doesn't want water, have her drink some every 10 mins

    At Home
    1) Have your baby introduced to a bottle ASAP!! This will allow you to take over 1 night feed and allow mom an extra couple hours of sleep - this is a big deal.
    We had our son introduced to a bottle on day 3, and wife pumped all milk required.
    2) Move baby to their own crib/ room relatively quickly (We moved our son into his crib at 4 weeks) This will drastically improve sleep for both of you
    3) Don't buy new things - they are expensive as hell, kids out grow things extremely fast and things are cheap on kijiji/ marketplace
    4) Dr Chase Kolik Gripe Water ,this stuff has been gold in our house as our son was/ is quite gassy - Get the good stuff, not the alcohol free. Its very gentle on baby so no worries.

    Again live in the moment and good luck! If you want me to elaborate on any of this PM me.
    This is all great advice! One note on the snacks front though is that make sure what ever you bring or give her is easy to throw up so things like muffins and soft fruit will be easier than granola bars.

    The bottle thing is also key the only thing I would add is that I believe its more about consistency than it is about early age as they can't form an association for quite a while. But if you're consistent with the bottle then once that ability to associate boob + bottle = food then you are ahead of the game. Our first was really good with the bottle but I wasn't consistent with it and we had about 3 months there where it was a fight to get him back on it. Also, your kid will end up having a preference for a bottle type and it probably won't be any of the first 2-3 that you buy because kids are assholes.

    Gripe water is the shit. It was the only thing that calmed our son down, it was our life blood for a little bit because he was so gassy. The second one hasn't needed it but we have a bottle on standby just in case.

    I'd also recommend getting the app or the book Wonder Weeks. It had phenomenal information about the gestation of baby then about all of their developmental leaps. Just when you think they are in a routine they will switch it up and turn into terrorists, this book/app helps explain what new skills they are learning and why the sudden change in their behavior.

    Also, you're a ways away from this point now but when baby is here you're going to probably want a way to track naps, feeds, diapers, medication etc so find a good app to track that. We've used BabyTime for both kids because it syncs between our phones and its been clutch. Things are going to be a blurr and you and momma are going to forget when baby last ate or was changed so it really helps with your sanity. Plus when they start having legit naps and not sporadic sleeping its good to track that and get a bit of a feel of how that is going. Mind you, my wife and I are engineers so maybe we just like data....


    EDIT: Side note, midwives carry the same amount of equipment with them everywhere they go that you would find in a level 1 hospital like High River. If you are a low risk pregnancy you're more than covered with medical training and equipment regardless of where you choose to have your kid and if there is an unexpected issue they are more than capable of handling it to get you transferred to emergency care (regardless if you are at the hospital or home). Again, like many people have mentioned just because you have a midwife doesn't mean you have to have a home birth, if you feel more comfortable in a hospital then the midwife will deliver your baby there. You get the same level of care and experience with a midwife regardless of where you choose to have the baby and I would say there is no argument that the total experience with a Midwife from pre to post birth far exceeds the random Doctor/Nurse combo you're going to get come delivery. Its more about having the same person who saw you through your whole pregnancy be there for the actual birth and do all of the follow up. It was a really educational experience for me and instilled a ton of confidence in us.
    Last edited by schurchill39; 07-08-2020 at 03:50 PM.
    Quote Originally Posted by rage2 View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    ...Last thing I want is someone reading my posts and losing their cock over it...
    Quote Originally Posted by Sugarphreak
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    Meh, they all look like Jackie Chan to me
    Quote Originally Posted by ExtraSlow View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    I'm generally cute.

  11. #111
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    calgary
    Posts
    2,028
    Rep Power
    96

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by gwill View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    vengie- your advice on the bottle made me laugh. I had a friend say breastfeeding is the only way to go this way they never had to help with bottles.
    This is definitely the alternative.
    But personally I'm not a dickhead and would prefer to help my wife in any way possible.

  12. #112
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    Location
    Calgary AB
    My Ride
    V8s
    Posts
    4,572
    Rep Power
    100

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by killramos View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    That’s an insane amount of time off.
    Ya it’s a lot. Our company is driving pretty hard towards gender equality, and parental leave is an obvious area where typically men don’t take much time off, so they strongly encourage it. I could go on, but maybe save it for next time we get a coffee.

    In the grand scheme though, 3 weeks vs 10 or even 20 is inconsequential as far as my work is concerned. I only have one shot to spend that kind of time with my kids, I’m gonna take advantage of it, at least to some extent.

  13. #113
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    Homeless
    My Ride
    Blue Dabadee
    Posts
    9,599
    Rep Power
    100

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by cjblair View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    Ya it’s a lot. Our company is driving pretty hard towards gender equality, and parental leave is an obvious area where typically men don’t take much time off, so they strongly encourage it. I could go on, but maybe save it for next time we get a coffee.

    In the grand scheme though, 3 weeks vs 10 or even 20 is inconsequential as far as my work is concerned. I only have one shot to spend that kind of time with my kids, I’m gonna take advantage of it, at least to some extent.
    It’s pretty cool of them for sure.

    How much to take off is definitely a complicated juggling act career wise.
    Originally posted by Thales of Miletus

    If you think I have been trying to present myself as intellectually superior, then you truly are a dimwit.
    Originally posted by Toma
    fact.
    Quote Originally Posted by Yolobimmer View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote

    guessing who I might be, psychologizing me with your non existent degree.

  14. #114
    Join Date
    Jun 2002
    Location
    A Calgarian now living in the 604
    My Ride
    V167
    Posts
    5,512
    Rep Power
    46

    Default

    I had booked 1 week off for baby. I instantly turned that into 2 as soon as we returned home. I then worked usual hours for 2 weeks until we were told to shut down re COVID. Since that time I've been working 1/2 days only by choice. Going into month 5 now.

    COVID + WFH has been a blessing in disguise. I am self employed, so this has essentially been a paid paternity leave. Without COVID being the push to WFH I don't think I would have worked reduced hours for this long. Staying at home and seeing all the stuff happen during the day that I would have otherwise missed has made me realize how important these early months are. Take as much time off as possible, you will never regret it. I will definitely try and do this for future kids as well.

  15. #115
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Location
    Calgary
    My Ride
    Born in Stuttgart
    Posts
    330
    Rep Power
    16

    Default

    I just had my second child last month and have a two year old as well.
    Be prepared you will be tired all the time for the first three months so buy stronger coffee. I reccomend death wish coffee or make sure you are well stocked up on your favortie caffine source.
    Take as much time off as you can (see point one) you will be tired and will need to try to watch the baby while your wife sleeps etc.

  16. #116
    Join Date
    Jun 1987
    Location
    SK
    My Ride
    Fit Dugan Signature (2016)
    Posts
    3,375
    Rep Power
    100

    Default

    I just hope you do a better job than I did with Rurr Jurr. I know it's a little late son but, I finally bought that pack of cigarettes I went out to get in 1993.
    Originally posted by SJW
    Once again another useless post by JRSCOOLDUDE.
    Originally posted by snowcat
    Don't let the e-thugs and faggots get to you when they quote your posts and write stupid shit.
    Originally posted by JRSC00LUDE
    I say stupid shit all the time.
    ^^ Fact Checked

  17. #117
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Edmonton area
    My Ride
    Has wheels
    Posts
    1,114
    Rep Power
    34

    Default

    Instead of starting a new thread, I'm just going to piggy back off of this one.

    Expecting our first little one in the summer and finally went shopping for some stuff last week and there are tons of options for everything, obviously.

    So I'm looking for some help in recommendations with your must haves and things you found helpful to have.

    Also if there are decent sites to review different car seats / strollers etc. It seems as though every site I've come across are just terrible haha.

    Any help would be much appreciated.

  18. #118
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Upstairs
    My Ride
    Natural Gas.
    Posts
    13,332
    Rep Power
    100

    Default

    This isn't popular with the aspen crown, but get the graco for both. Wal mart and Costco both sell em. Buy a base for the infant seat for each car.

    There's better stuff than graco out there, but not better value. It's a baby not a fashion accessory.
    Quote Originally Posted by killramos View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    You realize you are talking to the guy who made his own furniture out of salad bowls right?

  19. #119
    Join Date
    Jan 2019
    Location
    The Big Char.
    My Ride
    *The First*
    Posts
    4,136
    Rep Power
    100

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ExtraSlow View Post
    This quote is hidden because you are ignoring this member. Show Quote
    This isn't popular with the aspen crown, but get the graco for both. Wal mart and Costco both sell em. Buy a base for the infant seat for each car.

    There's better stuff than graco out there, but not better value. It's a baby not a fashion accessory.
    x2 sort of. I recommend the Baby Trends brand for infant car seats because it had a handle that meant your hand was in a natural position when lugging it around. If your palms are facing forward, it's a lot more difficult and awkward.

    Save the Diono car seats for Aspen. Fuck those completely. Horribly heavy and fragile.

    Buy a used City Select stroller on Kijiji for like $700 and sell it in two years for $650. Or, scavenge hard and get one for $600 that you sell for a profit in two years.

  20. #120
    Join Date
    Oct 2014
    Location
    alberta
    Posts
    324
    Rep Power
    16

    Default

    We have 2 babies a year apart at home right now. The wife decided peg perrego strollers and car seats. Biggest help early on was a good swing. A good bouncy chair.

    Both babies were born in summer so a good shade protector for spending time outside was crucial. Our back yard has turned into a jungle gym as we aren't taking the kids out much.

    We picked up a Pickler recently which has been awesome for the older baby inside the house. Also the kitchen helper/stool device has been perfect for when cooking in the kitchen. The older baby likes helping or being involved.

    Added options to consider for the wife are anything to help with simplifying some dinners. I bought a souve vide machine and one of the insta pots.

Page 6 of 92 FirstFirst ... 5 6 7 16 ... LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. One Dad’s Twitter Photo Essay on His Daughter’s Perilous Walk to School

    By speedog in forum Society / Law / Current Events / Politics
    Replies: 32
    Latest Threads: 09-08-2014, 12:07 PM
  2. Kitchener dad arrested at school after daughter draws picture of gun

    By Tik-Tok in forum Society / Law / Current Events / Politics
    Replies: 17
    Latest Threads: 02-26-2012, 05:13 AM
  3. Rich Dad Poor Dad

    By Mys73ri0 in forum Real Estate / Finance
    Replies: 59
    Latest Threads: 04-14-2011, 12:24 PM
  4. Replies: 20
    Latest Threads: 09-23-2009, 07:41 AM
  5. Input Survey for School Naming - New West Calgary High School

    By urban.one in forum Society / Law / Current Events / Politics
    Replies: 7
    Latest Threads: 05-22-2009, 09:04 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •