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Thread: Having kids: anyone regret it?

  1. #241
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    Quote Originally Posted by ExtraSlow View Post
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    I know someone of relatively modest means who was paying $1450 a month in daycare for a single kid. Fucking hell.
    Well then. I would have stopped at one also lol . That's about as high as I've heard. 1000-1200 seems to be average for daycares. Im jealous of parents that have family members watch over their children for even a couple days a week.
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    Quote Originally Posted by thinmyster View Post
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    Well then. I would have stopped at one also lol . That's about as high as I've heard. 1000-1200 seems to be average for daycares. Im jealous of parents that have family members watch over their children for even a couple days a week.
    That's one of the main reasons we haven't left Calgary. Not for childcare specifically, since my wife doesn't work outside the house, but just the proximity and close relationships with grandparents. It's great having two sets of grandparents here, there's always at least one person willing to drop what they're doing to come hang out with a kid or two.

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    Quote Originally Posted by killramos View Post
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    I feel like always having an excuse not to is the lesser evil to “had kids cause was bored”
    Agreed lol. But if you want kids no situation is perfect.
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    Quote Originally Posted by cjblair View Post
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    That's one of the main reasons we haven't left Calgary. Not for childcare specifically, since my wife doesn't work outside the house, but just the proximity and close relationships with grandparents. It's great having two sets of grandparents here, there's always at least one person willing to drop what they're doing to come hang out with a kid or two.
    I feel like we have definitely lost that at 3. My parents are across the city so its not really doable most days and my parents still work. My wifes parents live the community over and they've only babysat maybe a handful of times in the past 6 years lmao. Always "busy".
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  5. #245
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    I think the flip side of the convo is worth bringing up. Does anyone regret not having kids? I wanted them when I was growing up, but decided in my early twenties that I absolutely didn't want them. As much as I adore my nieces and nephews (blood and not blood), I'm stoked to give them back and be like - ok heeerrreeee you go!

    I am always being asked/told - "oh, when are you gonna have kids? You should have kids, they're great. Definitely should have them because they're such a blessing. Life is so unfulfilled without kids, you should have them."

    Uh no thanks. I like disposable income. I like sleeping in until 2pm. I like doing whatever the fuck I want.

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    Amen dannie lol

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    Quote Originally Posted by dannie View Post
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    I think the flip side of the convo is worth bringing up. Does anyone regret not having kids? I wanted them when I was growing up, but decided in my early twenties that I absolutely didn't want them. As much as I adore my nieces and nephews (blood and not blood), I'm stoked to give them back and be like - ok heeerrreeee you go!

    I am always being asked/told - "oh, when are you gonna have kids? You should have kids, they're great. Definitely should have them because they're such a blessing. Life is so unfulfilled without kids, you should have them."

    Uh no thanks. I like disposable income. I like sleeping in until 2pm. I like doing whatever the fuck I want.
    I fucking hate people like that. So high up on their pedestal. They're the ones that have th regrets, they just want other people to know the regret they feel.

    I have a kid, I dont regret it, but he's an asshole sometimes and we butt heads alot. He's a pre-teen so he's always right and I love to show him why he's wrong, it works for us lol

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    Quote Originally Posted by 03ozwhip View Post
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    I fucking hate people like that. So high up on their pedestal. They're the ones that have th regrets, they just want other people to know the regret they feel.

    I have a kid, I dont regret it, but he's an asshole sometimes and we butt heads alot. He's a pre-teen so he's always right and I love to show him why he's wrong, it works for us lol
    Haha! I was such an asshole with our kids in some ways... Like even when they were super little and we would play snakes and ladders or hi ho cheerio and simple little board games, I would destroy them and never let them win! It would drive my wife nuts but I would be like "don't cry ya big baby... Learn how to play better!" Haha! To this day we are all super competitive at games and rub shit in like crazy when we win.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 03ozwhip View Post
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    I fucking hate people like that. So high up on their pedestal. They're the ones that have th regrets, they just want other people to know the regret they feel.
    I don't know what kinda sadist would try to convince someone else to have kids just for the pleasure of seeing them regret it. In fact I've never had people try to convince me one way or the other. If your friends are pushing you to have kids its probably more likely that they're looking to be able to have play dates and do parent things together. After having our first it was like getting membership into a social club or AA support group lol. Friends and colleagues started confiding and sharing their experiences about their children immediately. It also becomes another go to topic for small talk. Used to be sports or weather but once someone you know has kids around the same age the small talk almost always turns to complaining/bragging about kids.

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    Quote Originally Posted by tirebob View Post
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    Haha! I was such an asshole with our kids in some ways... Like even when they were super little and we would play snakes and ladders or hi ho cheerio and simple little board games, I would destroy them and never let them win! It would drive my wife nuts but I would be like "don't cry ya big baby... Learn how to play better!" Haha! To this day we are all super competitive at games and rub shit in like crazy when we win.
    Haha! Thats exactly me. I ain't losing for your feelings homeboy, get better LOL

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    Quote Originally Posted by Manhattan View Post
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    I don't know what kinda sadist would try to convince someone else to have kids just for the pleasure of seeing them regret it. In fact I've never had people try to convince me one way or the other. If your friends are pushing you to have kids its probably more likely that they're looking to be able to have play dates and do parent things together. After having our first it was like getting membership into a social club or AA support group lol. Friends and colleagues started confiding and sharing their experiences about their children immediately. It also becomes another go to topic for small talk. Used to be sports or weather but once someone you know has kids around the same age the small talk almost always turns to complaining/bragging about kids.
    Ya before I had my boy there were a few different people that said things like that to me. We aren't friends anymore. You are right though, but there are also the people that degrade you for only having one kid.

    I've had people literally say to me "you're really going to let your kid grow up by himself without someone to play with?" Wtf kind of shit is that to say.

    Sorry to get a bit off topic, but there are people like that out there too.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 03ozwhip View Post
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    I fucking hate people like that. So high up on their pedestal. They're the ones that have th regrets, they just want other people to know the regret they feel.

    I have a kid, I dont regret it, but he's an asshole sometimes and we butt heads alot. He's a pre-teen so he's always right and I love to show him why he's wrong, it works for us lol
    It was just another POV bro, she wasn’t targeting you lol

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    Quote Originally Posted by max_boost View Post
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    It was just another POV bro, she wasn’t targeting you lol
    Lol I think you misread/misunderstood what I was saying. Not directed at anyone here, these are personal experiences, I was literally replying in agreeance with her. @max_boost
    Last edited by 03ozwhip; 01-14-2021 at 08:31 PM.

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    Quote Originally Posted by 03ozwhip View Post
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    Lol I think you misread/misunderstood what I was saying. Not directed at anyone here, these are personal experiences, I was literally replying in agreeance with her. @max_boost
    Oh haha ya you’re right I mis-read it lol my bad

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    Quote Originally Posted by dannie View Post
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    I think the flip side of the convo is worth bringing up. Does anyone regret not having kids? I wanted them when I was growing up, but decided in my early twenties that I absolutely didn't want them. As much as I adore my nieces and nephews (blood and not blood), I'm stoked to give them back and be like - ok heeerrreeee you go!

    I am always being asked/told - "oh, when are you gonna have kids? You should have kids, they're great. Definitely should have them because they're such a blessing. Life is so unfulfilled without kids, you should have them."

    Uh no thanks. I like disposable income. I like sleeping in until 2pm. I like doing whatever the fuck I want.
    I've dated women who were expressly against kids. My position is that I'm not against not having kids, but I'm not down with the idea of never having kids. I know it sounds weird, but basically if I'm in a relationship where we weren't able to have kids for whatever reason (medical, fertility, etc.), then I can be at peace with it. But I'm not okay with being in a relationship with someone where that is completely off the table.
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  16. #256
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    Quote Originally Posted by ExtraSlow View Post
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    I know someone of relatively modest means who was paying $1450 a month in daycare for a single kid. Fucking hell.
    that cant possibly be recently ..... can it? that sounds like boom time (pre 2015) prices

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    Quote Originally Posted by revelations View Post
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    that cant possibly be recently ..... can it? that sounds like boom time (pre 2015) prices
    Kids & Company was about $1,500/kid within the last five years.
    Can confirm.

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    Quote Originally Posted by revelations View Post
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    that cant possibly be recently ..... can it? that sounds like boom time (pre 2015) prices
    Not like any surplus of spaces has occurred since then. People can’t afford to have one parent work anymore.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Yolobimmer View Post
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    guessing who I might be, psychologizing me with your non existent degree.

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    That price was a few years ago. Kids U I think.
    Quote Originally Posted by killramos View Post
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    You realize you are talking to the guy who made his own furniture out of salad bowls right?

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    Bright path wanted 1300 for my toddler in the burbs
    Fuck that

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