Marriage, joint-accounts, and sharing cars

[G]

Joint accounts. When we got married she closed all her accounts and dumped all her money into mine. Money has never been the source of arguments because we both trust each other.

[codetrap]

We have a shared joint chequing and saving's account. Both of us use the same credit card. Cars are in both our names, though I consider the mazda her's, and the Outlander mine. Bike is in my name only, because she doesn't have a license.

We set it up this way based on a relationship counselor's advice. It eliminates all the financial power issues and sets a precedent of working together. It's OUR money, OUR home, OUR vehicles, and OUR family. None of this her account or my account and I can spend my money however I want. In my opinion, that's just enabling selfish behavior. We communicate constantly about purchases and we make those decisions together. If we want to buy something, we usually just go and get it. Our only caveat is that if you're gonna spend more than $100, let the other one know. There is no nagging about money as we're both responsible enough to handle it in a mature fashion.

Edit: If this isn't your way of doing it, that's fine of course. Everyone is different.

[ExtraSlow]

Money is often cited as the number 1 source of martial discord and relationship breakup. Whatever system you work with, make sure it works for both of you.

[Aleks]

1 joint account for everything. Been like that for 7 years before we even got married. No issues with her driving my cars either (unless it's a manual) So far so good.

[JustinMCS]

Originally posted by Mibz
This is exactly what we've done for years.

We each get paid into our individual accounts and put $X into the joint account each payday. We've got a handful of ING savings accounts that automatically pull from the joint for things like vacation, emergency and extra mortgage payments. It just keeps things more organized. Most bills, mortgage, insurance, etc all get billed directly to the joint account. Some go on a credit card which then gets paid from the joint.

Whatever's left in our personal accounts is ours to blow on whatever petty shit we choose.

It works for us. I imagine it doesn't work for everybody.

This is how we do it as well.

We have our own accounts and one joint where all the bills go and we each put in the same amount each month to cover bills. No fights, no mess, no wondering if a bill got paid. We both have access to the account also. Very simple!

[Sugarphreak]

...

[taemo]

not yet married but basically we both have our own accounts.
bills gets withdrawn from my account and she just sends me money every 15 days.
we independently pay for our own car insurance, CC and personal expense.

[FraserB]

Originally posted by taemo
not yet married but basically we both have our own accounts.
bills gets withdrawn from my account and she just sends me money every 15 days.
we independently pay for our own car insurance, CC and personal expense.

So you're still dating and she rents from you.

[Dave P]

Joint account for all the bills.
Seperate accounts for fun money.

We share her jeep, I drive my truck haha

[Mitsu3000gt]

The best way to do it IMO is as follows:

1) One joint account you both pay into equally (or proportionate to respective incomes if one is significantly higher/lower than the other). From this you pay the mortgage, bills/utilities, home improvements, furniture, or anything else that is "shared".

2) Completely separate accounts for everything else. This eliminates any arguments surrounding money, which is pretty much the #1 cause of arguing for most people I would think. As long as you don't do anything that prevents paying your share into the joint account, it doesn't matter what you spend your money on. This way you can't get mad because she bought $500 shoes, and she can't get mad because you bought new rims for your car, or whatever.

3) This also keeps gift giving a surprise, which is nice. With joint accounts, the other person will always know if you spent $1000 a Tiffany's or whatever a week before her bday.

That is my opinion anyway, but lots of people have the full-joint account and it seems to work just fine.

[CLiVE]

All money goes into a joint account, all bills get paid from this account. We also have a joint savings account. We view it as our money - doesn't matter who has the higher income.

After seeing what my parents went through, I am a firm believer in complete transparency. She can see all of my investment accounts, etc. and vice versa. Large purchases we consult eachother.

I view our financial situation as everything going into 1 bucket....that has a hole in it that drains to market mall.



Cars, we have always shared them all. Had up to 6 cars, and she drove whatever she felt like.

[CLiVE]

Originally posted by Mitsu3000gt
The best way to do it IMO is as follows:


3) This also keeps gift giving a surprise, which is nice. With joint accounts, the other person will always know if you spent $1000 a Tiffany's or whatever a week before her bday.

I hear you, but I either just take out cash to buy her a gift, or tell her...don't check the account for a few days. lol

[taemo]

Originally posted by FraserB


So you're still dating and she rents from you.

lol
engaged and getting married next year.
we just both didn't see any values with a joint account.
we can both sign in to our personal bank accounts so it's not like we are hiding anything.

[Mitsu3000gt]

Is it true that in a divorce, neither person can get at money they don't know about? Seems like that would be another advantage to separate finances.

[..*JDM Hatch*..]

Joint account. I spend my money and hers, make her ask before she can put gas in her car lmfao,JFK.

But yes joint acc, works easier with everything going in and coming out of that account. Separate savings accounts though.

[LollerBrader]

Originally posted by bigbadboss101
For those of you who are married, or living together with your other half, please feel free to share your current arrangements. Do you all have a joint bank account? With me I am thinking we can still have our separate accounts, but have one joint account where we would put X amount in to start with. Then monthly we can put in x amount. This joint account we would use for expenses that we use together. But when it comes to buying stuff and toys for self and each other we will use $ from our own accounts. Do you see any problem with this set up?

How about vehicles? With not so nice cars we probably don’t care too much. How about your newer, nicer cars? My colleague said his wife banged up the front of his truck a few times trying to park it in their garage. I park my cars (may it be the nice one or my beater) usually far away when I am in public. Places like Walmart and others most people don’t care too much for others’ cars. I don’t see my wife-to-be parking far away or not curbing the wheels though.

One joint account, and two personal accounts.
One joint CC, two personal low-limit CCs.

Both paychecks go into Joint accnt, and an equal allowance goes from joint pool to personal every month.

[03ozwhip]

Originally posted by codetrap
We have a shared joint chequing and saving's account. Both of us use the same credit card. Cars are in both our names, though I consider the mazda her's, and the Outlander mine. Bike is in my name only, because she doesn't have a license.

We set it up this way based on a relationship counselor's advice. It eliminates all the financial power issues and sets a precedent of working together. It's OUR money, OUR home, OUR vehicles, and OUR family. None of this her account or my account and I can spend my money however I want. In my opinion, that's just enabling selfish behavior. We communicate constantly about purchases and we make those decisions together. If we want to buy something, we usually just go and get it. Our only caveat is that if you're gonna spend more than $100, let the other one know. There is no nagging about money as we're both responsible enough to handle it in a mature fashion.

Edit: If this isn't your way of doing it, that's fine of course. Everyone is different.

thats exactly us to a T. it works for us. we have "fights" over money, but its not even really a fight, but just my way to jab at her for buying clothes. shes the manager at a womens clothing store so she gets ridiculous cheap clothes and sometimes shell com home saying she spent $4 and i flip out (jokingly).

just my way of telling her "you just spent $4 on clothes yesterday" lol

[baygirl]

What about debt accumulated before you were together? Part of the reason our finances are still separate is that I do NOT want him paying off my debt from before. Did you guys help your spouses out, or were they on there own paying it off?

[rage2]

Originally posted by Mibz
It's not her judgment that makes us laugh, it's the lengths you go to in an attempt to avoid that judgment.

"Alright, my brother will buy the TV and give it to me as a gift. Then I'll just sneak him some money, that way she can't get mad".

Thanks, she reads beyond, now I'll definately forward your post screenshot to your wife.

Originally posted by benyl
Yup, and if you are cheap asian like me and don't want to pay account fees for more than 1 account!

Please, account fees are waived if you have over $10k in the account, and you get twice that every pay period lol.

[rage2]

Originally posted by baygirl
What about debt accumulated before you were together? Part of the reason our finances are still separate is that I do NOT want him paying off my debt from before. Did you guys help your spouses out, or were they on there own paying it off?

That was an easy one for us, I had no debt, and she had hers and paid it off herself. While I would pay for everything, I don't believe in paying off old debts of gf's.

Other beyonders don't follow this rule from what I've heard!