My 30 day challenge- quitting the erbs and mental health
First I suck at writing stuff like this. So I'll just write down whatever comes out of me and go from there.
So I'm quitting the devils lettuce. Been smoking for around 18 years daily. Swicthed to the vape a couple years back and was alot better on the lungs.
Weed helps bring me down after the work day has ended 5-6pm. It also helps me concentrate on projects or when doing things around the house. I think I work better when im on it. I Never ever smoke at work.
I drink water like crazy when im smoking and through out the evening, i also munch out 2-3 snacks per night. This in turn keeps me up all night going to the bathroom. Usually 3-6 times per night. The wife always knows if I had a good sleep if the toilet seat is down in the morning haha.
Im a business owner of 3 years and doing well so it doesn't affect the daily. Im healthy, barely drink alcohol anymore except when camping which is every second weekend during summer. And then a couple times during winter. We take vitamins almost daily.
The reason for me quitting other then my huge sleeping issues is that the last couple years I've really been able to tell my anxiety is getting worse. I've used weed as a crutch to help turn my mood around when I get home. Little things bug me alot. Being a business owner the stress some days is pretty high.
Lately my moods have been like a light switch. I can be the happiest person, and then something small will happen and its like all the life comes out of me and I shut down, no talking and you can clearly tell something is wrong. It sucks. And I don't want any part of that. My brain never stops, I wish I could turn it off like other people.
I was told from a therapist that I have social anxiety? I get really anxious in big crowds, malls, I would just rather not be there. Which in turn has turned me into a home body, well for 20 years. I had a fucked up childhood, both parents divorced 2-3 times, lots of fighting. I got into the hard drugs and alcohol. Dealing drugs, fighting, generally just hanging out with the wrong people. I turned that all around at the age of 23 when I bought my first house. I grew up poor, which had always motivated me to work harder.
I'm creating this thread because I know there are lots of others like me. And maybe this can help someone out. I'm quitting cold turkey. All my products are packed away and I'm ready to do this to see the changes. Hopefully this helps with my sleep, anxiety, and mood changes.
- - - Updated - - -
Day 1. Very ancy, feel like I keep needing to go out and smoke. Felt freezing cold all evening. Slight headache. Had a positive day
Sleep- took an ativan 830pm. Had a hard time staying a sleep, gushing sweat like crazy -maybe 2-3 hrs of sleep
Day 2. Still ancy, feel like I keep needing to go out and smoke. Still felt cold and slight headache towards the end of the night. Positive day.
Sleep- ativan 830pm. Had a hard time staying awake and feel asleep quick. Stayed sleeping all night. Slept 7hrs
Day 3. Ancy feeling was alot less in the evening. Positve day even know we had some speed bumps. Ativan at 830 this will be my last one for sleep. Stayed sleeping most of the night around 7hrs which is not usual for me. Not drinking 7 glasses of water in the evening and eating 2-3 snacks is definitely helping my sleep. I've also been tracking my weight, which i will start to update if i see a difference.
Day 4 - Had a positive day, slept from 10-7 didn't wake up once.
Day 5 - Another positive day, didn't do much, didn't get many steps in. But could not get to sleep until 2am. Slept 2-7am (solid sleep). Maybe time to set a daily weekend step goal to wear me down. Started to get frustrated so took an ativan around 1am to help.
Day 6. Had a great day, keeping busy with little projects def helps. Also had a camomile tea before bed, first time its ever knocked me out like that. Slept 1030-7 solid.
Day 7. Had a great Sunday. A bit edgy towards the end of the night. But zero sleep. Had a camomile tea at 830 and my eyes were closing. Toss and turned, checked the clock at 1am and took an ativan. Didn't work. Grrrrrr Mondays. I don't know if I've ever not slept through out the night, super weird.
Day 8. Pretty good day, but the sleep! Had a camomile at 8 along with a meditation thingy on Spotify at 930. Don't remember the hearing end of it. Here's the fun part, 230am wake up toss and turn for 20 min, throw my head phones in and do the mediation thing again. Right back to sleep! Will be trying that again tonight for sure.
Last edited by B.Spilner; 10-27-2020 at 07:25 AM.
Cereal Killer.
@iambrianspilner